Spider

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Spider

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 11 June 1982 (33 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 62949
  • Number of comments : 65
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

About Spider : in relationship, full time employed, generally happy

Spider's page activity

Visits<b>bisousmaddie</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 7:00am<b>tigershark44</b> - the 03/27/2016 at 8:14pm<b>faerieonacid</b> - the 03/23/2016 at 7:07am<b>senor_octubre</b> - the 02/11/2016 at 10:23pm<b>hugoni2000</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 8:45am<b>stormrunner987</b> - the 12/09/2015 at 3:29pm<b>jonloran</b> - the 10/24/2015 at 4:53am<b>puppie406</b> - the 09/26/2015 at 12:18am<b>Nail9797</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 2:33pm<b>sexymomo1234</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 8:22pm<b>Kamorka</b> - the 05/28/2015 at 4:10pm<b>somethingstupd</b> - the 05/28/2015 at 1:19pm<b>badmandilon</b> - the 05/28/2015 at 11:16am<b>nityasomaiya</b> - the 05/28/2015 at 6:22am<b>roxzanne22</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 7:02pm<b>bryce0110</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 2:09pm<b>KushTreats</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 12:43am<b>jayyvonblood</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 1:47am

Spider's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

See all of Spider's badges

Spider's favorite FMLs

Today, as I was getting into work, I saw a co-worker of mine walking in front of me. We're really good friends and we joke around a lot, so I jokingly whistled at him and slapped his butt. Turns out it wasn't my friend, it was the new guy. Hello, sexual harassment charges. FML

by introuble / 08/23/2009 at 12:48am / United States (New York) / Work

Today, after my partner of two years broke up with me, I decided to have a heart to heart with my mother about it. Her advice was to clean the house. I asked how that would make me feel better. She said that she wasn't sure, but at least the house would be clean. FML

by Loveless / 08/22/2009 at 8:43pm / United States (West Virginia) / Love

Today, my husband came home from shopping with my 4 year old daughter and showed me a shirt she picked out herself. The shirt read "My mom's easy i'm living proof." Apparently she just liked the colours and her father agreed. FML

by naughtyshirt / 08/22/2009 at 5:29am / Australia (New South Wales) / Kids

Today, I found out that just because your boyfriend asks you to marry him doesn't mean that he will show up at the wedding. FML

by Loveless / 07/19/2009 at 9:06pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, I got all my co-workers motivated. We were all going to quit and walk out the door. I went first. I gave an emotional speech to my boss and threw my uniform to the ground. Then I turned around to to see the rest follow, they all began laughing. They didn't. They WANTED me to quit. FML

by ineedanewjob / 04/08/2009 at 8:34pm / United States (Missouri) / Work

Today, I waited in line to get into a club with my girlfriend, the bouncer only let her in, she told me to call her if I needed anything and left me. We were supposed to celebrate my birthday. FML

by intranator / 04/08/2009 at 5:43pm / Jordan (Amman Governorate) / Love

Today, my girlfriend told me that she had an ultrasound tomorrow morning. With a confused look on my face, she said to me "don't worry, it's not yours." FML

by Crazy09 / 04/08/2009 at 1:43pm / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, I was at work laminating a large photo. While I was doing this, I had a sudden itch on my nut sack. So I quickly scratched it away. When the customer came to pick up the print, I noticed that one of my pubic hairs had laminated itself on the cheek of the woman in the photograph. FML

by StevieMe / 04/08/2009 at 10:48am / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I was at a gay bar and asking a really convincing drag queen about her daily routine. I asked how she tucked her penis in. She responded, "Um, I'm a woman." I said, "Oh I'm sorry, are you pre-op or post-op?" She said, "No, I always have been and always will be a woman, asshole." FML

by thatwasmiz / 04/08/2009 at 2:38am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend and I were outside tanning in the sun. I asked her if she could put some sunscreen on my back. Thinking it would be funny, she used the lotion to write "I Love Little Boys". I work as a children's swimming instructor. FML

by Anonymous / 04/08/2009 at 12:03am / Canada (British Columbia) / Kids

Today, I saw the blueprints for my family's new house. My room is half the size of the room next to it. The room next to it is my step mom's walk-in closet. FML

by Powerfool / 04/07/2009 at 6:07am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally gave the guy I was with for over a year a blowjob. Right after he tells me "I don't want a girlfriend but I want you to be my best friend." FML

by LALALA3 / 02/16/2009 at 6:20pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy

Today, I finally gave the guy I was with for over a year a blowjob. Right after he tells me "I don't want a girlfriend but I want you to be my best friend." FML

by LALALA3 / 02/16/2009 at 6:20pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy

Today, I was hooking up with a girl in my apartment when I told her I didn't have a condom. She started laughing and upon realizing my look of confusion, said "Oh, you actually thought I was going to have sex with you?" FML

by pineapple456 / 02/16/2009 at 4:09pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy

Today, I was hooking up with a girl in my apartment when I told her I didn't have a condom. She started laughing and upon realizing my look of confusion, said "Oh, you actually thought I was going to have sex with you?" FML

by pineapple456 / 02/16/2009 at 4:09pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy