About SpazTheGreat : I rock my socks off.
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SpazTheGreat's favorite FMLs
by phlyingphuck / 07/19/2009 at 11:12am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was going on a first date with a girl I really like. We were going to see the new Harry Potter movie, and she told me she was getting all dressed up. It was only after I picked her up I realized she meant that she was dressing nicely. I was dressed as Harry Potter. FML
by harrysolo / 07/18/2009 at 9:26pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was eating a croissant. After eating half of it and about to take another bite, a spider crawled out of one of the holes of flaky deliciousness and descended down a thread of web to the table, where it scuddled away. There was a whole family of them living in there. FML
by homedoggieo / 07/14/2009 at 7:57pm / United States (North Carolina) / Animals
Today, I called my boyfriend and when he answered, I said the dirtiest thing I could think of to him on the phone. After a long silence, I heard, "Lacey? Is that you?" I accidentally called my dad. FML
by crazyt446 / 07/11/2009 at 11:13am / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy
Today, I was taking a shower and I saw a new body wash that said "radiance ribbons." That sounded a little effeminate, but it smelled manly enough and the only alternative was normal soap, so I used it. Just now, I stepped out into the sun and found out what "radiance ribbons" means. I sparkle. FML
by takinabreak / 07/10/2009 at 1:03pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
by wetboy / 07/05/2009 at 6:07am / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous
by litup / 07/04/2009 at 6:48pm / United States (Virginia) / Transportation
by R_U_CEREAL / 07/04/2009 at 4:58am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy
Today, I looked in my pocket for the phone number of a girl I met last night at a party. I remembered us talking and exchanging phone numbers. When I found the piece of paper, I discovered that instead of writing her number down, I had drunkenly written down my own. FML
by mrdave / 07/04/2009 at 1:54am / Canada (Ontario) / Love
by Cococautly / 07/04/2009 at 12:49am / Canada (Ontario) / Love
Today, I was in my new boyfriend's apartment for the first time. As I was flipping through his photo albums, I came across one full of disturbingly candid pictures of me. I found some as early as my trip to the state fair, three years ago. I met my boyfriend two months ago. FML
by Anonymous / 07/01/2009 at 3:18pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was riding on the back of my dad's motorcycle. After a few minutes, the vibrations from the engine became way too much for me and I couldn't control myself. I had such an intense orgasm, sitting right behind my father, with my arms around his waist. FML
by Anonymous / 06/25/2009 at 12:01am / United States (New York) / Intimacy
Today, my friend decided to come clean to his parents about his pot usage. He told them that he did it with me on many occasions. His parents decided it would be the right thing to call my parents. Thanks a lot asshole. FML
by jerk / 06/24/2009 at 2:44am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, my girlfriend was upset, so I tried to cheer her up by telling her how much I love her and how beautiful she is. After a minute, her face started to light up. I thought it had worked until I realized that she was being cheered up by the friends she was talking to online. FML
by Anonymous / 06/23/2009 at 10:50pm / United States (Tennessee) / Love
Today, I walked into my house to find several of my friends there for a surprise sweet sixteen party my mom was throwing for me. Everything was going great until the doorbell rang and a clown walked in. My mom hired a clown for my sweet sixteen. My friends took pictures. FML
by sweetsixteen / 06/22/2009 at 2:23pm / United States / Miscellaneous
- Today, I’m a French teacher abroad, and as my beard has a huge hole near my chin, my students call… Today, I’m on vacation in Tunisia. Having trouble with the heat at night, I tried sleeping outside… Today, I’m in Thailand and I met a monk. The conversation was so deep and interesting that, without…