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Soloman212

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Soloman212
  • Town/Country : McAllen, USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2176
  • Number of comments : 648
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Soloman212 : I've discovered that taking a hit of heroin into my left pupil allows me to type and read for a short while so I make use of such time lurking FML and posting comments. My life doesn't suck so I don't post any FML's. Being a baboon is so much betyjdyjko gdmlu lqrbd

Soloman212's last visitors

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Soloman212's FML badges

Perfectionist

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Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

See all of Soloman212's badges

Soloman212's favorite FMLs

Today, I discovered that if you slip on ice, imitating Mario from Super Mario Bros when he attempts to stop himself slipping, won't work in real life. I now have a broken nose, as well as a blood trail running from my driveway into my kitchen. FML

#7568710
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6170) - you deserved it (23828)

On 01/25/2010 at 1:17pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I found out my little sister was a stripper. At the same time, she found out that when I said I was having a "quiet birthday with some friends," what I really meant was "hiring a stripper to jump out of a cake." FML

#7420693
282 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46055) - you deserved it (7427)

On 01/18/2010 at 3:26pm - misc - by Jon (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, the little boy I nanny for finally stood up and went 'pee-pee on the potty'. I started cheering and clapping, making a big deal out of it. I flushed while he smiled proudly and pooped on the floor. FML

#7278236
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23014) - you deserved it (2861)

On 01/11/2010 at 1:08pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, at work a female co-worker was struggling with a stack of boxes in her hands. Her pantyhose was falling down and she asked me to help her. So I pulled up her pantyhose. When I looked up, she had a horrified look on her face. She was asking me to help her hold the boxes. FML

#6934352
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6888) - you deserved it (46761)

On 12/25/2009 at 3:10am - work - by harrassment101 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I tried to rid my son of his pacifier. He still uses it to sleep. My son is 20 years old. FML

#6783679
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27583) - you deserved it (20137)

On 12/16/2009 at 8:57pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I got an email from the company that manages my cat's microchip informing me that I had to update my information that had been entered by the local Humane Society. Apparently, they listed my cat "Coral" as the owner, and me as the pet. To change it, they needed the cat's signature. FML

#5663418
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45859) - you deserved it (3720)

On 10/05/2009 at 3:23pm - animals - by APetsPet (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was walking with my boyfriend down the street and a really hot guy walked past with no shirt on. While distracted by his hardened stomach muscles, I promptly walked into a pole, then became single. FML

#4994498
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13087) - you deserved it (62332)

On 09/02/2009 at 5:21am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, I was hurrying for the bus home from work. It was raining and I had my umbrella up. As I hurried by two women, I felt my umbrella hit one of them on the head. I turned to apologise and saw her standing with her hands on her newly bald head. My umbrella had lifted her wig off her head. FML

#4950874
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37884) - you deserved it (4022)

On 08/31/2009 at 10:48am - misc - by Karen (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I found out that 15 years ago my father threw out my college acceptance letters so that I could stay home and take over the family's funeral home business. FML

#4508324
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (83428) - you deserved it (2706)

On 08/13/2009 at 7:29pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was babysitting some kids and helping them make a poster about insects. They couldn't think of any more insects to add so I suggested a spider, and got told to "not be a dumbass, spiders aren't insects they're arachnids." The girl is six. FML

#4079125
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14944) - you deserved it (45874)

On 07/27/2009 at 12:52pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend of 3 years. I got reservations for a romantic dinner, and at the end, fireworks would spell out my proposal. The whole thing had taken weeks to plan out and had cost me a lot of money. She proposed to me at a subway station first. FML

#3561385
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45372) - you deserved it (6615)

On 07/07/2009 at 7:04pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I witnessed a horrible car accident and was interviewed by the local news. During the interview I said, "It was terrible. It was like watching a silent movie... but there was sound!" The interview has been aired 6 times. FML

#2612293
322 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28753) - you deserved it (72694)

On 06/04/2009 at 9:07pm - misc - by LadyChristina25 - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I was taking a nap. Apparently, my two year old daughter decided to crawl on top of the covers on my bed because she was scared since there was a thunder storm. I thought she was one of our cats so I kicked her off. She hit the wall. FML

#2532710
1159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69272) - you deserved it (179869)

On 06/02/2009 at 2:03pm - animals - by fmlfmlfml (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I won $200 a contest at a bar. The manager took me to a vault where money collected from the strippers go into a pool. He told me that at least half of the bills were slid through a strippers butt crack so I was to "choose wisely". FML

#2427031
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38699) - you deserved it (7819)

On 05/30/2009 at 7:39am - money - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I was hanging out at my school with some friends when my mom came to pick me up. A girl I knew wanted a hug before I left. I turned around to hug her and a clip on my backpack got stuck on her tank top. I tuned away the clip pulled the shirt ripping it and exposing her naked chest. FML

#1342086
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58634) - you deserved it (7358)

On 04/26/2009 at 12:11am - misc - by Mikey (man) - United States (Illinois)



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