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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 6202
  • Number of comments : 751
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Soloman212 : I've discovered that taking a hit of heroin into my left pupil allows me to type and read for a short while so I make use of such time lurking FML and posting comments. My life doesn't suck so I don't post any FML's. Being a baboon is so much betyjdyjko gdmlu lqrbd

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Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

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You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

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Soloman212's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up to the sound of my newborn screaming. I frantically hopped out of bed and stumbled into the nursery where I was met by the priceless sight of my five-year-old daughter attempting to breastfeed her understandably frustrated little brother. FML


I agree, your life sucks (68375) - you deserved it (6316)

On 05/06/2013 at 2:29am - kids - by SkeetinKeaton (man) - United States

Today, I was out with my grandma when a pair of very shady guys approached us in the street, hands in their pockets. Without breaking stride, she pulled a knife out of her handbag and told them they'd better keep walking. They did. What the fuck, gran? FML


I agree, your life sucks (53020) - you deserved it (7450)

On 05/04/2013 at 1:05pm - misc - by emasculated 10000% (man) - Sweden (Kronobergs Lan)

Today, for the third time this week, a telemarketer called me. Seriously annoyed, I told him in German that I don't speak English, in an attempt to get rid of him. He then started delivering his product pitch in German. FML


I agree, your life sucks (53295) - you deserved it (11987)

On 04/28/2013 at 9:57am - misc - by Anonymous - China (Shanghai)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend in public. She happily said yes, and the surrounding crowd cheered for us. About 10 minutes later, after the excitement died down, she leaned over and quietly said, "Actually, I don't want to marry you. I only said yes so I wouldn't disappoint the crowd." FML


I agree, your life sucks (76957) - you deserved it (11028)

On 04/26/2013 at 5:17am - love - by Anonymous -

Today, I saw a woman in the neighbouring apartment taking a shower without pulling the blinds of her bathroom window. As a good Samaritan, I waved my arms to attract her attention that she forgot the blinds. She noticed me, opened the window, did a weird boob dance and middle fingered me. FML


I agree, your life sucks (42802) - you deserved it (14698)

On 04/21/2013 at 10:56pm - misc - by Magicali (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I found out that Yale had actually accepted me seventeen years ago. My mother apparently burned my acceptance package and letters because she didn't want me to upstage her UChicago degree. FML

Today, my boyfriend said he felt like eating icing. So I baked him cupcakes, put icing on them and decorated them. When I handed them to him, he picked off the decoration, licked the icing and handed the cupcake back to me, saying, "I told you that's all I wanted." FML


I agree, your life sucks (26071) - you deserved it (51078)

On 04/15/2013 at 1:11am - misc - by Cupcakes (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I baked my friend a cake for his 21st birthday. When I arrived at his house, his girlfriend, who hadn't made him anything, screamed at me for "making her look bad." She then took the cake, banned me from the party, and kicked me out. FML

Today, I dressed up as Batman for a comic book convention. I was hit by a car on the way there by a man dressed up as the Joker for the same convention. FML


I agree, your life sucks (64171) - you deserved it (21142)

On 04/13/2013 at 1:04am - misc - by ironies a b*tch - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boyfriend of 2 weeks said that he was going to cook me dinner. After waiting for the frozen pizza that he decided to make for me to be completely cooked, he said, "Oh I hate this part", reached into the oven with his bare hands and took out the pizza, all while screaming. He is 24. FML


I agree, your life sucks (53861) - you deserved it (11485)

On 04/11/2013 at 11:42am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I tossed half a sausage to a dog sitting beside a park bench. It wasn't until he lunged for it and dragged the man beside him off of the bench that I realized it was a seeing eye dog. FML


I agree, your life sucks (32019) - you deserved it (25219)

On 03/20/2013 at 7:53pm - animals - by SolaceInRage (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I asked my boyfriend where he went to lunch. He said he went to Wendy's. I teased him and asked if he got tired of eating burgers and Frosty's all the time. His response? "What? No, I mean at Wendy's. You know, the hot girl from work?" FML


I agree, your life sucks (38529) - you deserved it (6297)

On 02/27/2013 at 12:36pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, it's been two months since I got a kitten. He loves to hide, and then surprise me by jumping out of his hiding place. It was quite a surprise when he launched himself out of my bag during class. FML


I agree, your life sucks (49103) - you deserved it (6288) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/28/2013 at 2:52pm - animals - by Kitten_Love - Sent from mobile version

Today, someone sent my boss a CD full of documents for an upcoming trial. It's my job to sort through the evidence, so he gave it to me. I looked on the CD. There's only one file; a 1020-page PDF of all the documents we need, and the pages weren't scanned in order. FML


I agree, your life sucks (31350) - you deserved it (2307)

On 01/03/2013 at 6:36pm - work - by fucked five ways to friday (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, a homeless man asked me for some money to eat. He ate the five dollars I gave him. FML


I agree, your life sucks (28426) - you deserved it (4079)

On 11/13/2012 at 6:34am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

G.E. Gallas's illustrated FML

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