Sneaky95

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Offline (the 08/30/2014 at 5:11am)

Sneaky95

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 8 February 1995 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1748
  • Number of comments : 13
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About Sneaky95 : Names Matthew Valentin ima sneaky Puerto Rican or so I've been told lol

Sneaky95's page activity

Visits<b>annamaria55555</b> - the 10/01/2014 at 6:35pm<b>msmama1985</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 11:27am<b>Zeus1070</b> - the 03/26/2014 at 8:43pm<b>Rababco</b> - the 02/20/2014 at 1:59am<b>Kaylea816</b> - the 01/23/2014 at 10:57pm<b>LuckyStar15</b> - the 07/22/2013 at 5:19am<b>Paintonmyarms214</b> - the 06/20/2013 at 7:34pm<b>justineelizabeth</b> - the 06/06/2013 at 1:51am<b>ignoremeimweird</b> - the 05/04/2013 at 10:25am<b>supersavvy</b> - the 04/30/2013 at 10:33am<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 04/26/2013 at 9:50am<b>dead_insects</b> - the 04/10/2013 at 7:16pm<b>xToryBear</b> - the 04/02/2013 at 1:46am<b>Tika876</b> - the 03/30/2013 at 11:29pm<b>gman123999</b> - the 03/29/2013 at 6:34pm<b>cb1002630</b> - the 03/26/2013 at 12:02am<b>hernaaandez</b> - the 03/25/2013 at 11:37pm<b>dancinwookie</b> - the 03/25/2013 at 9:40pm

Sneaky95's FML badges

50 favourites

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I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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Sneaky95's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked into the living room, only to find my brother wanking off to an episode of My Little Pony. FML

by bestiality, not even once / 06/14/2013 at 6:29pm / Ireland (Waterford) / Intimacy

Today, I ordered some burgers at a fast food joint. When I said, "No lettuce," the cashier looked dumbfounded and asked, "What's that?" I literally had to say, "The green stuff" before she got it. I'm losing hope. FML

by thatisfuckedup / 06/13/2013 at 6:12pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend dumped me, accusing me of lying to him about "being a hermaphrodite". His almost total lack of knowledge about female anatomy led him to believe that my clitoris is actually an extremely tiny penis. FML

by Hannah / 06/13/2013 at 12:19pm / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend actually yelled, "Why are you making this all about YOU?!" after I confronted her over cheating on me. FML

by a single fuck / 05/23/2013 at 12:40pm / Germany (Berlin) / Love

Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time to meet my parents. They were having a heated argument because my mom had bought "the wrong toilet paper" and my dad was angry because "she should know that he has a sensitive anus". FML

by Sonofa / 05/17/2013 at 11:52am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up to the sound of my newborn screaming. I frantically hopped out of bed and stumbled into the nursery where I was met by the priceless sight of my five-year-old daughter attempting to breastfeed her understandably frustrated little brother. FML

by SkeetinKeaton / 05/06/2013 at 2:29am / United States / Kids

Today, I was out with my grandma when a pair of very shady guys approached us in the street, hands in their pockets. Without breaking stride, she pulled a knife out of her handbag and told them they'd better keep walking. They did. What the fuck, gran? FML

by emasculated 10000% / 05/04/2013 at 1:05pm / Sweden (Kronobergs Lan) / Miscellaneous

Today, my parents threatened to kick me out of the house if I didn't agree to convert to their new brand of Christianity. This is a day after they ranted at me about how I should speak my mind more and not let myself be controlled by other people. FML

by Anonymous / 04/28/2013 at 4:19pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got caught masturbating, twice, by the same person. FML

by Anonymous / 04/28/2013 at 3:53pm / Saudi Arabia / Intimacy

Today, I popped a pimple while stopped at a red light. When I looked over the woman in the car next to me was laughing, and had her camera phone out. FML

by msarosi / 04/28/2013 at 6:28am / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, my car was stolen from the parking garage, the same one I work at as a security guard. FML

by naps aren't what they used to be / 04/27/2013 at 6:05pm / United States / Work

Today, I had to go to the emergency room with my sister, due to involuntary muscle spasms she was having. They gave her a muscle relaxer which caused her to be extremely tired and loopy. She decided to start singing loudly with a song she made up about butt fucking. FML

by seekerglow176 / 04/27/2013 at 8:42am / United States (Massachusetts) / Health

Today, I was walking through a rough part of town, when a woman screamed that I'd stolen her bag. I was tackled to the ground by a large guy, who then gave my bag to her. FML

by whathehell / 04/27/2013 at 4:28am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, I was getting ready to have sex with my boyfriend for the first time. It seems he thought I was a much larger cup size than I really am, because when he saw my actual boobs, he said, "Aaaaaaand they're gone". FML

by Anonymous / 04/27/2013 at 12:11am / United States / Intimacy

Today, my son had to help out at the local retirement home for his community service. He got in serious trouble and came whining to me about it after he tried threatening some of the residents into taking part in a Harlem Shake video. FML

by Shitty genes, no two ways about it. / 04/26/2013 at 8:21pm / Australia (Western Australia) / Kids