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SmelloJello

Offline (the 09/03/2014 at 1:04pm) | Search for a member

SmelloJello

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3315
  • Number of comments : 60
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

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SmelloJello's page activity

Visits<b>lilferrit</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 3:26am<b>One_Way</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 2:51am<b>3051628</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 11:13am<b>Driving_Gaming</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 6:39pm<b>exitium16</b> - the 01/07/2015 at 1:48am<b>Princess_Eevee9</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 10:58pm<b>jaydoug92</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 1:32am<b>Kirbyzx</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 10:00pm<b>ZY1431</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 7:02am<b>curticus</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 1:57pm<b>thebestintheworl</b> - the 12/30/2013 at 4:30am<b>boxbrandon11</b> - the 11/09/2013 at 1:30pm<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 11/08/2013 at 8:18pm<b>BelfastNuts</b> - the 08/03/2013 at 9:09am<b>LittlestPrincess</b> - the 08/02/2013 at 5:22pm<b>xdissizit</b> - the 07/14/2013 at 2:44am<b>ImposterDitto</b> - the 07/11/2013 at 3:15am<b>JFloUnknown</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 2:08pm

SmelloJello's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of SmelloJello's badges

SmelloJello's favorite FMLs

Today, I finally got into a yoga class with the instructor I've been crushing on for 2 years. As he walked closer to greet me, I lifted my leg over my head into a full split, and queefed obnoxiously loud. He responded with his gag reflex. FML

#3241027
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48032) - you deserved it (28345)

On 06/26/2009 at 12:51pm - misc - by LondonKitsch (woman) - United States

Today, while reading some chemistry notes I came across the term "solid water". Completely stumped, I asked myself, "What the hell is solid water?" Then I heard my little cousin say "ice." I'm a 4th year science major in university. He still checks the closet for monsters. FML

#3142518
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28457) - you deserved it (80729)

On 06/23/2009 at 10:19am - work - by uneek14 (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I decided to use fake tan, seeing as I am so pale. Everywhere I have been today, I have had children behind me. Singing the Oompa Loompa song. FML

#2991073
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14982) - you deserved it (59670)

On 06/18/2009 at 9:32am - misc - by OompaLoompa (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I was enjoying some much needed serenity while I ate lunch in an empty park. To my surprise, an older, clean cut man in a suit sits on the bench next to me. Without saying a word, he unleashes the most foul of farts I've ever witnessed, gets up, gives me a nod and leaves. FML

#2932416
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (74761) - you deserved it (5553)

On 06/16/2009 at 2:15am - misc - by Tim (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I rode my bike to work. While biking on the road, I gave a hand signal for turning left. A car passing the opposite way veered towards me and attempted to give me a high five. I now have cuts all over my body and my bike is in two pieces. FML

#2925389
299 comments

I agree, your life sucks (81326) - you deserved it (5565)

On 06/15/2009 at 10:13pm - misc - by Shaun (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I witnessed a horrible car accident and was interviewed by the local news. During the interview I said, "It was terrible. It was like watching a silent movie... but there was sound!" The interview has been aired 6 times. FML

#2612293
327 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32638) - you deserved it (78552)

On 06/04/2009 at 9:07pm - misc - by LadyChristina25 - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I witnessed a horrible car accident and was interviewed by the local news. During the interview I said, "It was terrible. It was like watching a silent movie... but there was sound!" The interview has been aired 6 times. FML

#2612293
327 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32638) - you deserved it (78552)

On 06/04/2009 at 9:07pm - misc - by LadyChristina25 - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I witnessed a horrible car accident and was interviewed by the local news. During the interview I said, "It was terrible. It was like watching a silent movie... but there was sound!" The interview has been aired 6 times. FML

#2612293
327 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32638) - you deserved it (78552)

On 06/04/2009 at 9:07pm - misc - by LadyChristina25 - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I asked my mom if I could join my friends in getting lessons in self defense. My mom told me that I didn't need them because my face was a better weapon to repel anyone. FML

#2492711
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68286) - you deserved it (5052)

On 06/01/2009 at 3:05am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - Korea Republic of (Seoul-t'ukpyolsi)

Today, I was serving a family at the restaurant where I work. When I went to ask the little girl what she wanted, I was tongue-tied and got "cutie" and "hun" mixed up and ended up asking, "What can I get for you, cuntie?" FML

#1751488
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79089) - you deserved it (24313)

On 05/08/2009 at 4:53pm - work - by keeks_25 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was serving a family at the restaurant where I work. When I went to ask the little girl what she wanted, I was tongue-tied and got "cutie" and "hun" mixed up and ended up asking, "What can I get for you, cuntie?" FML

#1751488
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79089) - you deserved it (24313)

On 05/08/2009 at 4:53pm - work - by keeks_25 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was serving a family at the restaurant where I work. When I went to ask the little girl what she wanted, I was tongue-tied and got "cutie" and "hun" mixed up and ended up asking, "What can I get for you, cuntie?" FML

#1751488
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79089) - you deserved it (24313)

On 05/08/2009 at 4:53pm - work - by keeks_25 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was running on a track above a basketball court. I noticed several cute guys playing a pick-up game, so I tried to run my hardest. Not paying attention, I didn't hear when they warned me about the ball flying towards me. It hit me in the head, I then ran into a wall and face-planted. FML

#1739978
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18937) - you deserved it (38826)

On 05/08/2009 at 12:18am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I saw my neighbor's son mowing their lawn when suddenly he started to do this crazy dance. Chuckling at his antics I waved and walked back into my house. His mom called me from a hospital later to ask if I could put the mower away; he had been attacked by bees. FML

#1643455
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19607) - you deserved it (43898)

On 05/04/2009 at 8:46pm - kids - by Jon (man) - United States (Maine)



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