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SkoomaKi

Offline (the 01/26/2015 at 10:12pm) | Search for a member

SkoomaKi

12Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 7972
  • Number of comments : 1781
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 41 posted

About SkoomaKi : (Skuu-ma-kee)

Lurked since early 2010, then I finally decided to make an account in 2011.

I like all regular commenters =)

Enjoy my tales.

The Moderators - Stories tell of Gods who walk among the FML commenters, keeping peace and prosperity throughout the community.

Perdix - Some say he is commenter who has been here since the beginning of FML, even the universe.

DocBastard - Legends tell of a medically fascinated doctor. Not much is known about him, just his intellect.

NoorFML - No one knows much about her, except her relations with Ezio (her husband). She is also a ninja.

Baustigt - Tales tell of an owner just as crazy as her dog. The dog, named Dula, can destroy worlds.

KyleeKay – Myths explain this girl’s obsession with the workings of human emotion. Her rational and ideal advice is wise to follow.

ManInTheMachine – A cyborg whom's consciousness is formed by it's computer program forming random code.

SkoomaKi's page activity

Visits<b>ThatSlappinBass</b> - 13 hours ago<b>TheTshirt</b> - 14 hours ago<b>hahatofunny</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 2:23pm<b>LavaHoppers</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 10:39pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 1:39pm<b>plasmarider</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 10:44am<b>ThatLobster</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 8:40am<b>PandahHeart</b> - the 04/05/2015 at 11:08pm<b>Wondermage</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 10:56pm<b>lonkite101</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 8:28am<b>DoomSkuller</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 11:49pm<b>Sylenwer</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 1:26pm<b>saifnaqvi11</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 10:06am<b>beaglegal</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 7:16pm<b>cheesyfeet2001</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 5:45pm<b>monsterblonde</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 1:03am<b>BeautifulLiesx</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 8:29pm<b>Malteser95</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 11:34am

Fucked!<b>plasmarider</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 4:44pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 10:47pm<b>AHzulu</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 5:48am<b>vikingchick</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 3:46pm<b>ClockworkPoleaxe</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 9:14am<b>Cautocracy</b> - the 02/13/2015 at 6:29pm<b>ebonyirony</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 10:06pm<b>hippodankamus</b> - the 02/04/2015 at 12:30pm<b>LeashaJoy5595</b> - the 02/01/2015 at 6:29am<b>buster113</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 6:26pm<b>xanderpanda999</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 6:33am<b>Zx_MaSsAcRe_xZ</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 10:38pm

SkoomaKi's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of SkoomaKi's badges

SkoomaKi's favorite FMLs

Today, I learned the hard way not to take off your shirt with a toothpick in your mouth. FML

#19521815
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6919) - you deserved it (25353)

On 04/24/2012 at 12:36pm - health - by monkeycannon7 - United States (Virginia)

Today, while putting on a load of laundry, I squeezed the detergent bottle and it made a noise like a woman's orgasm. After laughing, I realised that I'm probably too immature to be washing my own clothes. FML

#19521311
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10453) - you deserved it (25664)

On 04/24/2012 at 10:03am - intimacy - by mmmtortilla (woman) - Spain (Pais Vasco)

Today, I paid for someone else's pee so that I could pass my drug test. I didn't pass the drug test. FML

#19520767
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8307) - you deserved it (63463)

On 04/24/2012 at 4:29am - work - by xharmonyx - United States

Today, I left my number on my receipt for a cute waitress. As I was leaving the bar, she came running out and called me over. I obviously got excited. Turns out I'd forgotten to sign my slip. FML

#19516000
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10719) - you deserved it (19145)

On 04/23/2012 at 9:22am - love - by Dave (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was walking across a pedestrian crossing and waved at the driver of the car who'd stopped, just to say thank you. She stuck her middle finger up at me. FML

#19515959
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21010) - you deserved it (2561)

On 04/23/2012 at 9:00am - misc - by hoggypig -

Today, due to nervousness, I threw up while proposing to my girlfriend. FML

#19515625
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34094) - you deserved it (3413)

On 04/23/2012 at 5:51am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I realized just how awful my relationships have been when I discovered I emotionally connect with women on Jerry Springer. FML

#19511364
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17405) - you deserved it (5109)

On 04/22/2012 at 2:14pm - love - by Coquette (woman) - United States

Today, I came down with food poisoning of some sort. After hours of scrambling to the toilet to vomit and empty my bowels, my three-year-old daughter got fed up and is now trying to potty-train me. FML

#19511225
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22516) - you deserved it (2407)

On 04/22/2012 at 1:12pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out the bed I sleep in is the bed I was conceived in. FML

Today, I found out the bed I sleep in is the bed I was conceived in. FML

Today, I met a hot guy at the bar and we hit it off instantly. After a few drinks, he called a cab for us. When it arrived, I seducingly asked, "My place or yours?" He responds, "Both. I'll go to mine and you go to yours" and walked away. The cab driver laughed the whole way home. FML

#19509709
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26734) - you deserved it (11036)

On 04/22/2012 at 3:01am - misc - by ultraattitude - United States (California)

Today, I met a hot guy at the bar and we hit it off instantly. After a few drinks, he called a cab for us. When it arrived, I seducingly asked, "My place or yours?" He responds, "Both. I'll go to mine and you go to yours" and walked away. The cab driver laughed the whole way home. FML

#19509709
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26734) - you deserved it (11036)

On 04/22/2012 at 3:01am - misc - by ultraattitude - United States (California)

Today, I met a hot guy at the bar and we hit it off instantly. After a few drinks, he called a cab for us. When it arrived, I seducingly asked, "My place or yours?" He responds, "Both. I'll go to mine and you go to yours" and walked away. The cab driver laughed the whole way home. FML

#19509709
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26734) - you deserved it (11036)

On 04/22/2012 at 3:01am - misc - by ultraattitude - United States (California)

Today, I discovered I have really bad dandruff. I learned this when I went indoor mini golfing and my whole upper body lit up like a Christmas tree underneath the black light. Among my friends I'm now known as the abominable snowman. FML

#19509348
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20781) - you deserved it (3953)

On 04/22/2012 at 1:24am - health - by Andrew7847 (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out my fiancé has been cheating on me for the past month. The lady he has been seeing is a choreographer that was teaching him how to dance salsa for our wedding rehearsal. FML

#19509327
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29647) - you deserved it (2160)

On 04/22/2012 at 1:20am - love - by Gennifer - United States (New Jersey)



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