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SkoomaKi

Offline (the 01/26/2015 at 10:12pm) | Search for a member

SkoomaKi

26Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 8293
  • Number of comments : 1781
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 41 posted

About SkoomaKi : (Skuu-ma-kee)

Lurked since early 2010, then I finally decided to make an account in 2011.

I like all regular commenters =)

Enjoy my tales.

The Moderators - Stories tell of Gods who walk among the FML commenters, keeping peace and prosperity throughout the community.

Perdix - Some say he is commenter who has been here since the beginning of FML, even the universe.

DocBastard - Legends tell of a medically fascinated doctor. Not much is known about him, just his intellect.

NoorFML - No one knows much about her, except her relations with Ezio (her husband). She is also a ninja.

Baustigt - Tales tell of an owner just as crazy as her dog. The dog, named Dula, can destroy worlds.

KyleeKay – Myths explain this girl’s obsession with the workings of human emotion. Her rational and ideal advice is wise to follow.

ManInTheMachine – A cyborg whom's consciousness is formed by it's computer program forming random code.

SkoomaKi's page activity

Visits<b>hugoni2000</b> - 12 hours ago<b>_ExcitedPotato_</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 1:15am<b>XmasaX</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 5:03am<b>ashleyrose465</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 2:01am<b>rouslov</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 12:41am<b>Amateur_Dank</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 2:02am<b>DaRito</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 8:16pm<b>Superwalkatural</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 11:11pm<b>tanziir1</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 6:01pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 9:29pm<b>Pandabae</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 7:15pm<b>BlackHawkSavior</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 7:05pm<b>toebeans19</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 5:34pm<b>Micool</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 4:30pm<b>WordBea</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 9:46am<b>BettyMouse</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 6:59am<b>senor_octubre</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 6:36pm<b>furstur</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 12:26am

Fucked!<b>rouslov</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 6:42am<b>DaRito</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 2:17am<b>tanziir1</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 12:01am<b>BlackHawkSavior</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 1:06am<b>BettyMouse</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 12:59pm<b>furstur</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 6:26am<b>iluvmonkeys</b> - the 06/13/2015 at 10:33pm<b>Aly_donawho</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 6:12am<b>kmaheynoway</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 7:25pm<b>___Unknown__08</b> - the 05/06/2015 at 7:18pm<b>thebakingseal</b> - the 05/06/2015 at 2:06pm<b>elizabeth_black</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 2:40pm<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 4:11am<b>HedgeOfTheHogs</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 1:23am<b>plasmarider</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 4:44pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 10:47pm<b>AHzulu</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 5:48am<b>vikingchick</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 3:46pm

SkoomaKi's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of SkoomaKi's badges

SkoomaKi's favorite FMLs

Today, I was making love to my fiancée, when she dug her nails into my back and told me to "choke" her like I did last night. I was at work last night. FML

#20698818
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (85335) - you deserved it (5840)

On 06/01/2013 at 3:51am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I told my boyfriend I wanted to spice up our sex life. He suggested incorporating bacon. He was serious. FML

#19959638
248 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24983) - you deserved it (5603)

On 07/19/2012 at 4:29pm - intimacy - by cortanaisahobot - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I walked too close to a first-aid kit sticking out of a wall at work, and it cut my arm. Laughing at the irony, I opened it to get a band aid out. It was empty. FML

#19928485
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25226) - you deserved it (2427)

On 07/12/2012 at 2:28pm - work - by Ian Artis - United States

Today, I realized just how much of a bitch I am when I grounded my son for not telling me what he got me for my birthday. FML

#19861407
274 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6272) - you deserved it (81086)

On 06/28/2012 at 4:29pm - kids - by MeanMother - United States (Missouri)

Today, I woke up to a punch in the balls. FML

#19860691
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23854) - you deserved it (3960)

On 06/28/2012 at 1:36pm - misc - by whoslade (man) - United States

Today, I got a new set of acrylic nails put on. While driving home, I had an urge to pick my nose. My car then went over a speed-bump. I now feel like my brain is bleeding. FML

#19769783
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8237) - you deserved it (40597)

On 06/11/2012 at 8:42am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my parents think it's so hot outside that it's okay for them to work in the garden naked. FML

#19692459
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31104) - you deserved it (2276)

On 05/28/2012 at 6:15am - misc - by Ladieda (woman) - Netherlands (Gelderland)

Today, on Facebook, my sister posted a ton of photos of herself wearing a skimpy bikini, commenting that she looked hideous and fat. I can't stand attention-seeking fuckballs, so I called her on it. My mother then condemned me for "mocking" my sister, and grounded me for an entire month. FML

#19689652
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32731) - you deserved it (5467)

On 05/27/2012 at 5:53pm - misc - by namenlos (man) - Australia

Today, in the middle of a localised drought, and an accompanying hosepipe ban, my mother has decided that she still needs to water her lawn. To balance out the water usage, she's placed a complete ban on the use of our shower until the weather lets up. FML

#19684423
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20177) - you deserved it (1520)

On 05/26/2012 at 4:41pm - misc - by gazza (man) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I realized the only reason my phone ever rings is because someone needs help with their computer. FML

#19672620
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17851) - you deserved it (1943)

On 05/24/2012 at 12:41pm - misc - by that guy - United States

Today, my boyfriend started laughing during sex because my boobs are slightly different. He then broke up with me after I pointed out that his nuts aren't exactly even either. FML

#19621100
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36173) - you deserved it (5951)

On 05/14/2012 at 6:31am - intimacy - by anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. Trying to be sexy, I told him what I was doing with my vibrator. I heard a loud bang, followed by him shouting, "Why don't you just fucking marry it, then?!" and then hanging up. FML

#19608230
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31662) - you deserved it (9724)

On 05/11/2012 at 6:02pm - intimacy - by 504-A1 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I woke up, only to find my arm was still asleep. I tried to move it just a tiny bit, but somehow ended up punching myself in the face. FML

#19602885
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20140) - you deserved it (4601)

On 05/10/2012 at 3:14pm - misc - by Amy (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went to a party dressed as a zombie. Everyone admired my hilarious "zombie dancing". Those were my regular dance moves. FML

#19602686
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20912) - you deserved it (4790)

On 05/10/2012 at 2:10pm - misc - by tinydancer (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was at my job life-guarding, when a woman pushed the spine-board over, hitting me on the back of my head. She laughed, but I now have a concussion and a stiff neck, and my co-workers can't stop laughing at the "irony." FML

#19591635
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17906) - you deserved it (1365)

On 05/08/2012 at 10:00am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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