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SkoomaKi

Offline (the 01/26/2015 at 10:12pm) | Search for a member

SkoomaKi

13Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 7981
  • Number of comments : 1781
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 41 posted

About SkoomaKi : (Skuu-ma-kee)

Lurked since early 2010, then I finally decided to make an account in 2011.

I like all regular commenters =)

Enjoy my tales.

The Moderators - Stories tell of Gods who walk among the FML commenters, keeping peace and prosperity throughout the community.

Perdix - Some say he is commenter who has been here since the beginning of FML, even the universe.

DocBastard - Legends tell of a medically fascinated doctor. Not much is known about him, just his intellect.

NoorFML - No one knows much about her, except her relations with Ezio (her husband). She is also a ninja.

Baustigt - Tales tell of an owner just as crazy as her dog. The dog, named Dula, can destroy worlds.

KyleeKay – Myths explain this girl’s obsession with the workings of human emotion. Her rational and ideal advice is wise to follow.

ManInTheMachine – A cyborg whom's consciousness is formed by it's computer program forming random code.

SkoomaKi's page activity

Visits<b>HedgeOfTheHogs</b> - 14 hours ago<b>ThatSlappinBass</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 9:58am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 8:52am<b>hahatofunny</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 2:23pm<b>LavaHoppers</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 10:39pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 1:39pm<b>plasmarider</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 10:44am<b>ThatLobster</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 8:40am<b>PandahHeart</b> - the 04/05/2015 at 11:08pm<b>Wondermage</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 10:56pm<b>lonkite101</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 8:28am<b>DoomSkuller</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 11:49pm<b>Sylenwer</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 1:26pm<b>saifnaqvi11</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 10:06am<b>beaglegal</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 7:16pm<b>cheesyfeet2001</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 5:45pm<b>monsterblonde</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 1:03am<b>BeautifulLiesx</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 8:29pm

Fucked!<b>HedgeOfTheHogs</b> - 8 hours ago<b>plasmarider</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 4:44pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 10:47pm<b>AHzulu</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 5:48am<b>vikingchick</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 3:46pm<b>ClockworkPoleaxe</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 9:14am<b>Cautocracy</b> - the 02/13/2015 at 6:29pm<b>ebonyirony</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 10:06pm<b>hippodankamus</b> - the 02/04/2015 at 12:30pm<b>LeashaJoy5595</b> - the 02/01/2015 at 6:29am<b>buster113</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 6:26pm<b>xanderpanda999</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 6:33am<b>Zx_MaSsAcRe_xZ</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 10:38pm

SkoomaKi's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of SkoomaKi's badges

SkoomaKi's favorite FMLs

Today, I was making love to my fiancée, when she dug her nails into my back and told me to "choke" her like I did last night. I was at work last night. FML

#20698818
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (81986) - you deserved it (5586)

On 06/01/2013 at 3:51am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I told my boyfriend I wanted to spice up our sex life. He suggested incorporating bacon. He was serious. FML

#19959638
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24931) - you deserved it (5597)

On 07/19/2012 at 4:29pm - intimacy - by cortanaisahobot - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I walked too close to a first-aid kit sticking out of a wall at work, and it cut my arm. Laughing at the irony, I opened it to get a band aid out. It was empty. FML

#19928485
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25169) - you deserved it (2419)

On 07/12/2012 at 2:28pm - work - by Ian Artis - United States

Today, I realized just how much of a bitch I am when I grounded my son for not telling me what he got me for my birthday. FML

#19861407
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6257) - you deserved it (80907)

On 06/28/2012 at 4:29pm - kids - by MeanMother - United States (Missouri)

Today, I woke up to a punch in the balls. FML

#19860691
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23771) - you deserved it (3949)

On 06/28/2012 at 1:36pm - misc - by whoslade (man) - United States

Today, I got a new set of acrylic nails put on. While driving home, I had an urge to pick my nose. My car then went over a speed-bump. I now feel like my brain is bleeding. FML

#19769783
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8211) - you deserved it (40525)

On 06/11/2012 at 8:42am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my parents think it's so hot outside that it's okay for them to work in the garden naked. FML

#19692459
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31066) - you deserved it (2273)

On 05/28/2012 at 6:15am - misc - by Ladieda (woman) - Netherlands (Gelderland)

Today, on Facebook, my sister posted a ton of photos of herself wearing a skimpy bikini, commenting that she looked hideous and fat. I can't stand attention-seeking fuckballs, so I called her on it. My mother then condemned me for "mocking" my sister, and grounded me for an entire month. FML

#19689652
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32662) - you deserved it (5460)

On 05/27/2012 at 5:53pm - misc - by namenlos (man) - Australia

Today, in the middle of a localised drought, and an accompanying hosepipe ban, my mother has decided that she still needs to water her lawn. To balance out the water usage, she's placed a complete ban on the use of our shower until the weather lets up. FML

#19684423
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20120) - you deserved it (1515)

On 05/26/2012 at 4:41pm - misc - by gazza (man) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I realized the only reason my phone ever rings is because someone needs help with their computer. FML

#19672620
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17801) - you deserved it (1938)

On 05/24/2012 at 12:41pm - misc - by that guy - United States

Today, my boyfriend started laughing during sex because my boobs are slightly different. He then broke up with me after I pointed out that his nuts aren't exactly even either. FML

#19621100
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36103) - you deserved it (5943)

On 05/14/2012 at 6:31am - intimacy - by anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. Trying to be sexy, I told him what I was doing with my vibrator. I heard a loud bang, followed by him shouting, "Why don't you just fucking marry it, then?!" and then hanging up. FML

#19608230
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30219) - you deserved it (9472)

On 05/11/2012 at 6:02pm - intimacy - by 504-A1 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I woke up, only to find my arm was still asleep. I tried to move it just a tiny bit, but somehow ended up punching myself in the face. FML

#19602885
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20078) - you deserved it (4594)

On 05/10/2012 at 3:14pm - misc - by Amy (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went to a party dressed as a zombie. Everyone admired my hilarious "zombie dancing". Those were my regular dance moves. FML

#19602686
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20830) - you deserved it (4779)

On 05/10/2012 at 2:10pm - misc - by tinydancer (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was at my job life-guarding, when a woman pushed the spine-board over, hitting me on the back of my head. She laughed, but I now have a concussion and a stiff neck, and my co-workers can't stop laughing at the "irony." FML

#19591635
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17845) - you deserved it (1362)

On 05/08/2012 at 10:00am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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