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Shortay123's FML badges
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Shortay123's favorite FMLs
Today, I had to move back in with my dad and brother. After getting settled, I had to shower. I got everything ready and when I got in, it smelled strongly of pee. The stink was so intense I could barely breathe. Cleaning doesn't even help. I'm stuck here for at least a month. I hate living with men. FML
by Anonymous / 11/02/2010 at 2:06am / United States (Wisconsin) / Health
by Anonymous / 10/24/2010 at 8:36pm / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy
by Doritos / 06/17/2010 at 4:06am / United States (Hawaii) / Intimacy
Today, I thought about my boyfriend and all the things we used to do together years ago. Today, I also spent the day doing my now husband's laundry and watching him sit on the couch with his hand inside his underwear. FML
by Bruja5 / 02/07/2010 at 12:15am / United States (New Jersey) / Love
Today, my dad found out I got a tattoo behind his back and is really really upset. When I got home from work my car wasn't in the driveway. When I asked my dad where it was, he replied "you'll get it back when your tattoo comes off." FML
by tattooooooface / 01/28/2010 at 8:08am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I really wanted something to drink. I looked in the fridge, and found some of my grandma's soy milk. I decide to take a swig, and instead of tasting soy, I tasted rotten chicken. Turns out my grandma knew I drink her soy milk and decided to swap it with expired chicken broth. FML
by souped / 12/10/2009 at 12:41am / United States (Colorado) / Work
Today, my mom told me that I am going to end up getting myself pregnant. I am 21 and a virgin. She continued to yell at me and call me a liar all night. I don't know which is worse, being a 21 year old virgin or my mother accusing me of lying about it. FML
by virginmary / 12/06/2009 at 3:07am / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous
by wobbles / 12/04/2009 at 12:28am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by IlikeGreenPlants / 11/25/2009 at 9:41pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was exercising, laid on my back, lifting weights over my head. My boyfriend thought it would be funny to casually sit by my feet and suddenly tickle them mercilessly. Caught off guard, I started wiggling, laughed and dropped the weights. On my face. FML
by 20lbknockout / 10/20/2009 at 12:26am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health
by Chensticles / 10/13/2009 at 9:25pm / Miscellaneous
by Hairball / 09/01/2009 at 2:05pm / United States (South Carolina) / Work
Today, while I was walking downtown a homeless person asked me for a dollar. I thought it would be funny to wave the dollar in his face and taunt him. I guess he thought it would be funny to stab me in the leg with a pencil. FML
by who_could_it_be / 08/06/2009 at 9:35am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, a moth was flying around my house. Annoyed, I picked up a shoe to crush it with. The moth landed on a light fixture on the ceiling, so I made my move. Dead, the moth slipped gracefully through air and onto my head. So did the light fixture. FML
by Anonymous / 08/02/2009 at 5:20pm / Canada / Miscellaneous
Today, I asked a buddy of mine if he wanted to see a movie. He said he was busy that day, so I decided to go alone. Midway through, the couple behind me is making out and kicking my seat. I turn around, and it's my ex-girlfriend making out with my buddy. FML
by frankfukhergood / 07/09/2009 at 1:49am / Canada / Miscellaneous
- Today, I’m on vacation in Tunisia. Having trouble with the heat at night, I tried sleeping outside… Today, I’m in Mexico for an internship. I was at a party when a drunk guy harangued me, calling me… Today, I’m in China, and I took my Golden Retriever to the groomer’s to get him cleaned up, because…