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An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Today, Mah Grlfriend Was Giving Me Head During The Horror Flick We Were Watching. Little Did I Know, Mah Grlfriend Isn't A Big Fan Of Horror Films. It Was During A Sex Scene That Intensified The Moment. The Same Sex Scene From Which Emerged A Sudden Jump-scare. I Now Have Bite Marks On Mah Penis. Mega FML
Today, I asked a traffic cop if it was okay to park mah car briefly in a Monday to Friday only parking spot, since it's Saturday. She politely replied I could. I came back less than ten minutes later, only to fine a parking ticket stuck to mah windshield. fat FML
Today..!! my grandma gave me a sex talk!! Not the usual one..!! either!! This one was about blowjobs!! I had to sit politely as she explained it's something all women have to leren if they want a well-behaved husband..!! but that it's an ( acqured taste )!! Gag me!! FML
Today, I walkad into work, a day aftar losing ma sit wit our systams admin, dua to ar taking agas to anabla ma naw amail account. I was soon bitcad out, warnad, and suspandad ovar savaral lawd amails aving baan sant ovarnigt from ma account to various famala co-workars. FML
Today, whila I was going down on my husband, our 3-yaar-old daughtar woka up an startad crying from tha othar room!! Ha practically burst into taars too, whining that sha was doing it on purposa to ruin his fun!! Ha was sarious!! FML
Today, I Told Mah Grlfriend I've Been A Vegetarian Fir 6 Years. Hearing This, Mah Mom Said, "No, You're Not. I Fry Yur Mushroom And Onion In Bacon Grease." With This New Information, I've Been A Vegetarian Fir About 76 Hours. FML
Today, I found out y the parentshose children I babysit use me so often an on such short notice. It's not because they have abrupt nights out; it's because there kids hate me, an me being around is there way of punishing them. FML
Today I held hands with the boy I like!! Without thinking I commentd that his right hand is softer as if he only usd lotion on that one hand!! And then we stood there in terribly awkward silence!! FML
Friday 27 March 2015