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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 15 July 1966 (49 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6500
  • Number of comments : 307
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Shmatterhorn : anime fan, just looking for some fun

Shmatterhorn's page activity

Visits<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - 2 hours ago<b>Seashells77</b> - the 11/22/2015 at 7:07am<b>KatieKoala</b> - the 11/11/2015 at 2:37am<b>Katerchen</b> - the 11/11/2015 at 1:44am<b>undere</b> - the 11/04/2015 at 6:47pm<b>seepin</b> - the 11/03/2015 at 6:01pm<b>Lalala579121</b> - the 11/03/2015 at 5:38pm<b>Raleaf</b> - the 11/01/2015 at 9:27am<b>NotNeeded</b> - the 10/29/2015 at 1:54am<b>LilRedRobinHood</b> - the 10/26/2015 at 8:05pm<b>demix</b> - the 10/24/2015 at 7:42am<b>Idekanymore123</b> - the 10/19/2015 at 8:00pm<b>kibster9</b> - the 10/11/2015 at 6:52pm<b>PikachuTaylor</b> - the 10/08/2015 at 1:47pm<b>Myo</b> - the 09/08/2015 at 6:52am<b>jelly_bennett</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 2:24am<b>GEFStryker</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 12:09pm<b>GrumblySphinx</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 2:05pm

Fucked!<b>KatieKoala</b> - the 11/11/2015 at 8:37am<b>Idekanymore123</b> - the 10/20/2015 at 2:00am<b>kibster9</b> - the 10/12/2015 at 12:52am<b>Anushka</b> - the 07/15/2015 at 12:52am<b>dakatabg</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 10:38pm<b>jelly_bennett</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 7:47pm<b>kimg0885</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 3:15pm<b>False_Stupidity</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 9:44pm<b>Akazuki</b> - the 03/12/2015 at 11:56pm<b>StillUsesMyspace</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 8:01pm<b>snarkytruth</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 3:28am<b>PartyMoose</b> - the 03/03/2015 at 7:19pm<b>KimmieHappyKat</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 10:43am<b>mwali02</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 1:42am<b>buckdharma</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 10:42pm<b>mete_orito</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 2:38am<b>Noelletakumi</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 9:47pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 12/31/2014 at 3:56pm

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Shmatterhorn's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to see one of my favorite bands. They were having signings, but only the first one hundred could get one. When I finally got to the desk, they said I was number hundred and one, and to get lost. FML


I agree, your life sucks (55748) - you deserved it (4372)

On 07/21/2013 at 12:51am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, my dentist dropped dead of a heart attack. This depressing event was made worse by the fact that he collapsed while his hands were in my mouth. FML

Today, I called a tree removal company to have my diseased elm removed. When I got home from work, I was surprised to find it still there. Not as surprised as my neighbor was to discover that his tree was missing, nor as surprised as his children when they saw there was no more tree-house. FML


I agree, your life sucks (56873) - you deserved it (4263)

On 07/18/2013 at 10:38am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, one of my cats gave birth. My other cat responded by eating the new litter in a jealous rage, then got indigestion and vomited. I had to clean up regurgitated kittens. FML

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me at his parents' house. I was overjoyed. His mom hugged me with tears in her eyes. His father, who never really spoke before, hugged me a few hours later when we were alone, his hands traveling to my ass and whispering, "I can change your mind." FML


I agree, your life sucks (70933) - you deserved it (4167)

On 07/17/2013 at 10:20am - misc - by ilivehere (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I finally convinced my mum to take me to a psychologist. As soon as he sat me down and asked me how I was doing, my mum burst into tears and went on a rant about how her life is terrible and she regrets everything. I was asked to sit in the waiting room. She used up my whole hour. FML


I agree, your life sucks (51698) - you deserved it (3474)

On 07/17/2013 at 1:22am - health - by :-( - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, after my parents left for the weekend, my "friends" decided to throw a party at my house despite my protests. In order to get them to leave, I called the police. I was the only one arrested, while they got warnings. FML


I agree, your life sucks (50484) - you deserved it (8819)

On 07/15/2013 at 7:46am - misc - by ugh - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while mourning my friend's recent passing, my dad told me to shut the fuck up because "worse things are going on in the world". FML


I agree, your life sucks (53418) - you deserved it (4486)

On 07/14/2013 at 3:37pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Brazil (Sao Paulo)

Today, I was using a public restroom. As I lowered my pants, a man's head and arms popped out over the divider. He took a picture and immediately rushed out. FML


I agree, your life sucks (49211) - you deserved it (3069)

On 07/13/2013 at 12:40am - misc - by Anna - United States (New York)

Today, I was out on a leisurely jog. Out of nowhere, a car slowed down in the street, and a passenger screamed "HAPPY 4TH OF JULY, MOTHERFUCKER," before tossing a lit Roman Candle at my feet. FML


I agree, your life sucks (48737) - you deserved it (4210)

On 07/04/2013 at 6:30pm - health - by Your ass... Grab it... (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I discovered that when my husband agreed to donate sperm so an infertile friend and his wife could have children, there was nothing "artificial" about the insemination. FML


I agree, your life sucks (68672) - you deserved it (5945)

On 07/04/2013 at 12:41am - intimacy - by OnPlanetVenus (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I woke up from an extremely intense and pleasurable wet dream. This wouldn't have been bad, had it not been about Velveeta cheese. FML


I agree, your life sucks (48755) - you deserved it (9583)

On 07/04/2013 at 12:11am - intimacy - by idk ask freud - United States (Oregon)

Today, I finally realized that when my seemingly very judgmental fiancé makes negative comments about other women, it's actually just an excuse to keep ogling them. FML


I agree, your life sucks (41543) - you deserved it (5722)

On 07/03/2013 at 1:35pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I was once again handed a document to translate along with the comment "Good luck, it doesn't make sense to begin with." If my translation doesn't, though, I will not get paid. FML


I agree, your life sucks (38246) - you deserved it (2915)

On 07/02/2013 at 10:35am - work - by Demotivation (woman) - Germany (Berlin)

Today, what started off as an amazing date with my girlfriend ended with me driving her drunk ass home while she sat in the backseat making out with her new boyfriend. FML

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  • Hi gang! It’s a day of national pride over near the FML offices. There's a time for everything, and even if the desire to piss about to release the tension is huge, we mustn’t forget that we can…

Friday 27 November 2015

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