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Shmatterhorn

Offline (17 hours ago) | Search for a member

Shmatterhorn

26Fucked!

ShmatterhornShmatterhorn
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 15 July 1966 (49 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6929
  • Number of comments : 321
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Shmatterhorn : anime fan, just looking for some fun

Shmatterhorn's page activity

Visits<b>UberMom</b> - 18 hours ago<b>Much2Much4U</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 3:11am<b>missmorggan</b> - the 01/16/2016 at 8:33am<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 9:19pm<b>jamaarlove</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 4:21am<b>joco4</b> - the 01/14/2016 at 11:04am<b>LivToFail</b> - the 01/13/2016 at 10:46pm<b>krfenton8</b> - the 01/12/2016 at 10:52am<b>AndesFults</b> - the 01/11/2016 at 11:13pm<b>CogadhTallon</b> - the 01/11/2016 at 2:00am<b>AyeJay101</b> - the 01/08/2016 at 6:47am<b>msizziec</b> - the 01/08/2016 at 2:42am<b>mds9986</b> - the 01/08/2016 at 12:34am<b>HighlandShadows</b> - the 01/07/2016 at 6:39pm<b>Tyrez</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 12:11pm<b>Crazion</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 9:06am<b>ThirteenThirteen</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 3:53am<b>Y0UI34574RD</b> - the 12/27/2015 at 10:23pm

Fucked!<b>UberMom</b> - 12 hours ago<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 01/16/2016 at 3:19am<b>joco4</b> - the 01/14/2016 at 5:04pm<b>AndesFults</b> - the 01/12/2016 at 5:13am<b>HighlandShadows</b> - the 01/08/2016 at 12:40am<b>Crazion</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 3:06pm<b>GeneralMotors</b> - the 12/14/2015 at 8:13pm<b>KatieKoala</b> - the 11/11/2015 at 8:37am<b>Idekanymore123</b> - the 10/20/2015 at 2:00am<b>kibster9</b> - the 10/12/2015 at 12:52am<b>Anushka</b> - the 07/15/2015 at 12:52am<b>dakatabg</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 10:38pm<b>jelly_bennett</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 7:47pm<b>kimg0885</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 3:15pm<b>False_Stupidity</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 9:44pm<b>Akazuki</b> - the 03/12/2015 at 11:56pm<b>StillUsesMyspace</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 8:01pm<b>snarkytruth</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 3:28am

Shmatterhorn's FML badges

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of Shmatterhorn's badges

Shmatterhorn's favorite FMLs

Today, I got into a fight with my mother. Her idea of a birthday present to me is buying me a husband. Yes, buying. She told an asshat she found online about my trust fund, and now they're both trying to put together "the wedding of the millennium". She still doesn't understand why I'm mad. FML

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years drunkenly proposed to me, while sitting on the crapper, with the door open. FML

#20927152
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46534) - you deserved it (4722)

On 10/20/2013 at 3:06am - love - by ShittyProposal - United States (Ohio)

Today, I slept over at my friend's house. Her dad made breakfast for us. While fixing a plate, my friend said, "Careful, my dad clips his nails in the kitchen." She said it with a sarcastic, joking tone, and laughed afterwards. While eating, I found a toenail in my food. Her response? "I told you." FML

#20926236
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48791) - you deserved it (5346)

On 10/19/2013 at 11:04am - misc - by sleepysophie (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, my mom let me stay home from school, because I was sick. We both agreed not to tell my dad, since he's adamant that I never miss even one day of school. A few hours after my mom left for work, he came back home, with another woman. FML

#20925128
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71805) - you deserved it (3406)

On 10/18/2013 at 12:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, we had a safety meeting at my warehouse job. They had an entire power point based around their message, "Stop getting hurt; it costs the company too much money." FML

#20925040
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40835) - you deserved it (4070)

On 10/18/2013 at 10:29am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, after holing myself up in my room for the day, I eventually turned my phone back on and told my girlfriend that my grandma passed away today. She replied, "Ask me if I fucking care," then accused me of not caring about our relationship because I went offline all day. FML

#20918838
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50770) - you deserved it (4708)

On 10/13/2013 at 12:20pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I went home after work with my best friend who I am also secretly in love with. We had a few drinks, were getting touchy, and one thing led to another. Before leaving, I got the courage to ask her out on a real date. Her only reply was, "I don't want to lose such a good friend." FML

Today, I got proposed to. I have been dating my boyfriend for 3 years and we have 2 kids. It was perfect, except it was my ex-boyfriend who proposed to me. FML

#20901818
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48879) - you deserved it (5809)

On 09/30/2013 at 10:47am - love - by courtnayy (woman) - United States

Today, my dad asked me to stop calling him "dad" because it’s too weird for his girlfriend’s kids to hear, because they call him dad. FML

#20901637
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56101) - you deserved it (2723)

On 09/30/2013 at 4:04am - kids - by meens42 - United States

Today, I summoned the courage to talk to my friends about the money they owe me for my photography services at their wedding. We had agreed on a fair price, but now they're pissed, claiming that I'm being selfish and should consider it my wedding gift to them. FML

#20897064
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47384) - you deserved it (5320)

On 09/26/2013 at 5:31pm - money - by cheese (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I bought some really expensive face wipes that were supposed to cure my awful acne. I was excited to use them until I found out my mom had used them all wiping down her car. FML

Today, I found my brother wearing nothing but underwear. That would have been okay if it weren't my lingerie. FML

Today, I helped my brother propose to his girlfriend of 5 years in the spot where they had first met. As he delivered his heartfelt speech, a sizable crowd appeared. When he got down on one knee, she punched him in the gut, yelled, "I never loved you", and ran away. Now he won't talk to me. FML

#20887080
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52188) - you deserved it (3323)

On 09/18/2013 at 9:45pm - love - by ElizaZee (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I met my birth mother. My dad won't talk to me, my mom won't stop crying and thinks I'm replacing her, and the rest of my family won't stop calling me a bitch. I'm 21, and I just wanted to meet the woman who pushed me head-first out of her vagina. FML

Today, I read a seemingly serious article online about giving your smartphone some extra charge by putting it in the microwave for one minute. My phone is now fried. FML

#20864782
533 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19625) - you deserved it (141789)

On 09/02/2013 at 4:37pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arkansas)



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