Shmatterhorn

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Offline (the 12/07/2016 at 2:09am)

Shmatterhorn

32Fucked!

ShmatterhornShmatterhorn
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 15 July 1966 (50 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 8981
  • Number of comments : 348
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About Shmatterhorn : anime fan, just looking for some fun

Shmatterhorn's page activity

Visits<b>Tiaxlnr</b> - the 11/13/2016 at 10:31pm<b>BlueAlpaca</b> - the 10/09/2016 at 1:05am<b>iwillcallpolice</b> - the 10/07/2016 at 9:27am<b>SixthSinEnvy</b> - the 10/06/2016 at 1:05pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 10/03/2016 at 9:08pm<b>disturbedgd</b> - the 10/01/2016 at 3:11pm<b>chyiochan</b> - the 09/14/2016 at 8:29pm<b>ItnHmn</b> - the 09/07/2016 at 4:51am<b>fishingforubies2</b> - the 09/02/2016 at 7:12pm<b>joco4</b> - the 08/26/2016 at 2:26am<b>Brightbulb</b> - the 07/24/2016 at 4:52pm<b>slapstick1982</b> - the 07/18/2016 at 2:40pm<b>frankmz</b> - the 07/15/2016 at 4:09pm<b>BlueBaronBitch</b> - the 06/25/2016 at 9:03am<b>darkangel7410</b> - the 06/23/2016 at 3:54am<b>crackie</b> - the 06/19/2016 at 7:47pm<b>raven83</b> - the 06/12/2016 at 8:44am<b>MagicalPony3783</b> - the 05/05/2016 at 5:02pm

Fucked!<b>disturbedgd</b> - the 09/15/2016 at 5:10am<b>ItnHmn</b> - the 09/01/2016 at 7:07am<b>Brightbulb</b> - the 07/16/2016 at 6:36am<b>BlueBaronBitch</b> - the 06/25/2016 at 3:03pm<b>Mcstud1y</b> - the 03/17/2016 at 5:22am<b>FujisakiChihiro</b> - the 02/20/2016 at 5:23am<b>UberMom</b> - the 02/05/2016 at 10:55am<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 01/16/2016 at 3:19am<b>joco4</b> - the 01/14/2016 at 5:04pm<b>AndesFults</b> - the 01/12/2016 at 5:13am<b>HighlandShadows</b> - the 01/08/2016 at 12:40am<b>Crazion</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 3:06pm<b>GeneralMotors</b> - the 12/14/2015 at 8:13pm<b>KatieKoala</b> - the 11/11/2015 at 8:37am<b>Idekanymore123</b> - the 10/20/2015 at 2:00am<b>kibster9</b> - the 10/12/2015 at 12:52am<b>Anushka</b> - the 07/15/2015 at 12:52am<b>dakatabg</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 10:38pm

Shmatterhorn's FML badges

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

See all of Shmatterhorn's badges

Shmatterhorn's favorite FMLs

Today, I went on a date. He stole my credit card. FML

by elphi / 12/15/2012 at 1:11am / United States (Illinois) / Money

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, one of the girls who has made it her job to ruin my life cornered me in the hallway at school. She tried to insult me, and for the first time in my life I had a scathing comeback. My elation quickly ended when she violently shoved my face into the water fountain. FML

by ShadowReiku / 12/13/2012 at 3:39am / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my friend was complaining to me about her problems. I tried to be a good, understanding friend, listening and giving advice. When it was my turn to vent, she interrupted me, saying, "Sorry, but I don't really care." FML

by sushichick / 12/12/2012 at 7:44am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, after weeks of begging, I finally got an interview at my dream job. Turns out, they only agreed to interview me because they thought I was someone else. FML

Today, I sent in an assignment from my batshit insane teacher. The assignment was to read a poem, analyze it, and make a comic of its plot. This would've been fine if the teacher who assigned it to me didn't teach math. FML

by bestnameright / 12/09/2012 at 10:53pm / United States (District of Columbia) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, after having sex, my girlfriend left my apartment after furiously ranting at me, because I made her come "too many times" and that it's "unfair" to her. What? FML

by AllegroRubato / 12/04/2012 at 3:09pm / Chile (Region Metropolitana) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I faced a dilemma. If I don't let the cat sleep in my bedroom, she spends all night howling at the door, waking up my 2-year-old in the process. If I do let her in, the dog gets distressed and chews the contents of the bin. If I let both of them in, I have no room to sleep. FML

by SweetheartSusie / 12/04/2012 at 4:19am / United Kingdom / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, the battery cables on my car came loose, thus resetting my car's electronics to factory settings. The anti-theft system is now turned on, and I can't start my car with it on. Luckily, it turns off with a remote. The remote broke about six months ago. FML

Today, I was working the dart game at my local amusement park when a couple paid to play. They were highly intoxicated, and they thought the object of the game was to hit me with the darts. FML

by hawksbc / 11/28/2012 at 10:14am / United States (Iowa) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my step-mom threw out some of the "boxes of junk" in my room, because apparently, I'm a pack rat. I guess she and everyone else in my family won't be receiving those Christmas presents. FML

by WritingWrongs / 11/25/2012 at 8:28am / United States / Money

Today, a nearby volcano erupted for the second time. We were all urged to keep our windows and doors closed in case of ash clouds. My father responded by opening every window and door and shouting, "Come at me, bro!" FML

by vanillatwilight2 / 11/20/2012 at 11:50pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my English professor accused me of plagiarizing a poem I submitted, because she'd read it online earlier that day. The poem was mine; I posted it after writing it for her class, and even after logging into the site to prove it, she reported me to the school. FML

Today, my brother decided to join me on my first date. Not only did he answer the door with a bat, he also got inside the car and sat next to my date, pushing me to the back. He stayed the entire time, and walked me back to the house. My mom laughed and gave him $20. It was a dare. FML

by Mmkay1515 / 11/12/2012 at 10:47pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I finally met the girl I've been talking to on phone for a while and found her charming in person as well. There's just one problem: she has more facial hair than I do. FML

by x / 11/11/2012 at 9:16pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, due to a health insurance mix up, my schizophrenic girlfriend has been off her meds for a little over a week. She's convinced I can read her mind, and if I don't stop "pretending" she'll slit my throat in my sleep. Her medication won't be available for at least another two weeks. FML