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ShinyArcanine

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ShinyArcanine

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 1018
  • Number of comments : 25
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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ShinyArcanine's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of ShinyArcanine's badges

ShinyArcanine's favorite FMLs

Today, I went on a date with a girl I like. Afterwards, I drove her home, and we just sat there awkwardly. I thought she wanted to kiss me but was nervous, so I jokingly said "What're you waiting for? Christmas?" I guess she took that as a "Get the hell out", because she broke into tears and left. FML

#21395685
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18518) - you deserved it (23858)

On 04/18/2015 at 10:38am - love - by fuck (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, a friendly game of Cards Against Humanity somehow ended in a screaming match, my best friend's mother pulling out her tits, and me getting bit in the foot by a dog. FML

Today, I started lactating. That would be fine if I had a kid. Or was pregnant. Or wasn't 16. FML

Today, a guy attacked me and tried to steal my bag. I tried to defend myself by biting him as hard as I could. I then woke up to my husband screaming in pain. FML

#21360466
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33007) - you deserved it (3904)

On 02/21/2015 at 3:28pm - misc - by poncho55 (woman) -

Today, I had sex with my girlfriend for the first time. Even after several hours I wasn't able to climax. My girlfriend now thinks that I don't like her body, and the reason I couldn't orgasm is because I don't like having sex with her. We spend the rest of the night in silence. FML

Today, I found out that my boyfriend wasn't really bedridden sick on Valentine's Day. A Super Smash Bros game date with his friends was just more important. FML

#21358314
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45) - you deserved it (4877)

On 02/17/2015 at 10:40pm - love - by superscript - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. I'm extremely uncomfortable with eye contact, but he kept staring into my eyes the entire time. I had to sing the F.U.N. song from Spongebob in my head to stop myself having an anxiety attack. FML

#21356336
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36462) - you deserved it (5076)

On 02/14/2015 at 10:41pm - intimacy - by jessybear777 - United States (Missouri)

Today, my 15 year old sister asked which animal rice comes from. She believed every word when my mum told her it's harvested from tiny cows in Asia. FML

#21340484
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27827) - you deserved it (2269)

On 01/19/2015 at 7:45pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I found out my 7-year-old daughter really did lie about my husband's "other girlfriend" as revenge for being grounded, and that he never cheated on me at all. We're well into our divorce proceedings and he won't forgive me for not believing him when he denied it. FML

#21327839
304 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23420) - you deserved it (42562)

On 12/31/2014 at 2:00pm - kids - by skanula414 (woman) - Sweden (Skane Lan)

Today, after we had sex, my boyfriend told me how my orgasms used to make him think I was having a seizure. FML

#21327166
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27358) - you deserved it (3745)

On 12/30/2014 at 1:15pm - intimacy - by GladYoureConcerned (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, on a first date with a guy, I spilled ice cream all over my pants. He bought me some more, and as I was thanking him, he said, "You've never had a guy treat you right, have you?" I said no and started crying. FML

#21322290
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39311) - you deserved it (4367)

On 12/22/2014 at 8:28pm - love - by Soulara89 (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my husband sent me a link to an article titled "5 ways you are unknowingly destroying your husband and killing your marriage." FML

Today, my daughter wasn't feeling well, so we allowed her to sleep in bed with us. She snuggled right up with my husband. I felt a little jealous until she turned around and cuddled with me, just long enough to throw up all over me. She then flipped back over and snuggled with her dad. FML

#21314569
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33528) - you deserved it (3608)

On 12/09/2014 at 5:39pm - kids - by SickMaMa - United States (New York)

Today, my wife was giving me a blowjob when I foolishly asked her how she got so good at giving them. She looked straight into my eyes and replied, "Practising on about six guys before you." FML

#21308641
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31254) - you deserved it (18284)

On 11/30/2014 at 8:07am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was getting to second base with a really hot guy, but I couldn't stop laughing when he said my boobs were "soft like cake." He got so embarrassed that he lost his boner. FML

#21303170
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33264) - you deserved it (9185)

On 11/21/2014 at 4:56am - intimacy - by weirdthingtosay (woman) - United States (Washington)



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