Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Shaowolf

Offline (20 hours ago) | Search for a member

Shaowolf

3Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 20 March 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 971
  • Number of comments : 28
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About Shaowolf : Professional Badass

Shaowolf's page activity

Visits<b>darthgagemo</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 2:45pm<b>toshaleigh</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 11:10pm<b>SecretSociety7</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 6:21am<b>bombielol</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 5:34am<b>delilablue95</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 11:31pm<b>iPixiee</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 7:24pm<b>sam882</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 10:49am<b>RaspberryFlower</b> - the 01/20/2015 at 5:25pm<b>pks2014</b> - the 01/20/2015 at 8:15am<b>drgestrocka</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 10:49pm<b>jmcgee17</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 6:04pm<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 4:58pm<b>GrimmCrimm45</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 2:23pm<b>willt9797</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 12:54pm<b>davidpropert</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 10:25am<b>flupsht</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 10:07am<b>AlwaysWatching</b> - the 01/16/2015 at 3:53pm<b>Cooldude6158</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 7:18am

Liked!<b>Cooldude6158</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 1:18pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 2:13pm<b>Amber_Naomy</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 1:25pm

Shaowolf's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of Shaowolf's badges

Shaowolf's favorite FMLs

Today, I was working the drive-thru at McDonalds, and as I handed out a Diet coke to the customer, the man started growling and yelled "HULK SMASH!" He smashed the cup with two fists and drove off. I was drenched in soda. FML

#16827191
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36694) - you deserved it (4595)

On 06/24/2011 at 12:46am - work - by Sam (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I went to the vending machine, put in a dollar, and reached down to grab my snack. The slot door wouldn't open, so I pushed it harder. I got my hand in, but the door got stuck again, this time with my hand inside. I tried to push with my other hand. It got stuck too. FML

#15006025
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25690) - you deserved it (9018)

On 02/16/2011 at 6:58pm - misc - by CandyMachine (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, he stopped, got off, walked into the kitchen grabbed a doughnut, and came back to finish while he ate it. FML

#14813410
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33754) - you deserved it (6821)

On 02/02/2011 at 3:59pm - intimacy - by jessica - United States (Utah)

Today, while in my room sleeping, my little brother deemed it necessary to come in and drop a book on my face. When I sat up with a now bloody nose, he looked at me, pointed, and said "You've just been facebooked" and ran away giggling. FML

#14806356
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43437) - you deserved it (7947)

On 02/02/2011 at 12:57am - kids - by Malakai - United States

Today, my boyfriend dumped me because his iPod app said I was cheating. FML

#14797285
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45951) - you deserved it (4936)

On 02/01/2011 at 1:52pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Delaware)

Today, this guy I have a huge crush on came with me to my house to study. I was warmly welcomed by my drunken mother laying naked on the floor. FML

#14779228
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34161) - you deserved it (2601)

On 01/30/2011 at 9:03pm - misc - by madelynn (woman) - United States

Today, I went to see "Black Swan" with my parents, not realizing that it was basically a porno. So I sat next to my dad while Mila Kunis and Natalie Portman had passionate lesbian sex on a twenty foot screen. And I'm pretty sure I heard the old guy behind us jacking off. FML

#14689182
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36489) - you deserved it (6627)

On 01/23/2011 at 7:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, in the middle of the night, my girlfriend whispered "Are you asleep?" I chose not to respond, to see what she'd do. She then let rip a loud, stinking fart, giggled, and went back to sleep. FML

#14610611
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14450) - you deserved it (36905) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 4:53am - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, I was getting it on with my boyfriend. I started to come, screaming, "Ah... ah... ah... AHH!" To which he added, "Staying alive! Staying alive!" FML

#14608705
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30868) - you deserved it (19964) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 1:24am - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, I had to repeat my order in Starbucks three times because the barista was staring at my chest. FML

#14572536
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25509) - you deserved it (11677)

On 01/13/2011 at 11:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland

Today, I realized explosive diarrhea can happen, and at the most inopportune times, such as on the day of MY wedding. At the alter while my husband said his vows. FML

#8658648
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55389) - you deserved it (2920)

On 02/26/2010 at 5:23am - love - by pain (woman) - Japan

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. After about 10 minutes, when we change positions, he shouts: "Power Rangers - Transform!" FML

#4636801
259 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58402) - you deserved it (11696)

On 08/18/2009 at 7:45pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting a bit steamy. After a few minutes, he jumps up and runs over to the closet and puts on a long brown jacket putting the hood over to his eyes. He looks me in the eyes and says 'I am Obi Wan Kenobi and I'm going to slay you with my light saber'. FML

#4223881
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50544) - you deserved it (9554)

On 08/02/2009 at 3:17am - misc - by dam01 (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting a bit steamy. After a few minutes, he jumps up and runs over to the closet and puts on a long brown jacket putting the hood over to his eyes. He looks me in the eyes and says 'I am Obi Wan Kenobi and I'm going to slay you with my light saber'. FML

#4223881
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50544) - you deserved it (9554)

On 08/02/2009 at 3:17am - misc - by dam01 (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I had just a few dominoes left to complete the whole project that I've been working on for about three weeks. I pressed record on my video camera, flicked the first domino, and watched with pride. When it finished, I realized I hadn't actually pressed record. FML

#2766675
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44683) - you deserved it (29444)

On 06/10/2009 at 7:39am - misc - by DamnDominoes (woman) - United Arab Emirates (Dubai)



Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML
  • Madonna must be the only person breathing a sigh of relief right now thanks to all the idiots arguing about the colour of a dress. Thanks to a badly-lit photograph, everyone seems to have forgotten that she super…

Friday 27 February 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: