- Town/Country : Not specified
- Title : Mister
- Birth Date : Not specified
- <3 status : Not specified
- Number of visits : 539
- Number of comments : 14
- Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted
About Shan2510 : hi
About Shan2510 : hi
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That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Today, I heard a noise outside in the middle of the night, so I went out for a look. I'm also pregnant and can't stop farting. I get 2 steps outside and accidentally let a huge one rip, then, from the shadows I hear "Oh my god!" and then running in the opposite direction. I farted away a prowler. FML
by Gassy / 09/21/2015 at 10:45am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
by tessie94 / 09/06/2015 at 2:33pm / Austria (Wien) / Love
Today, I was at the gym playing basketball. A very attractive girl chose me to be on her team. We were playing well and hitting it off. I had decided to ask for her number after the game, until I smashed the ball in her face, resulting in her having a broken nose. FML
by ChildishKeynote / 08/02/2015 at 3:45pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by cricketsins / 11/07/2013 at 10:33pm / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm / United Kingdom (Wiltshire) / Geek
Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. He's been calling his penis "fun-sized" for a while now, but I didn't know he meant it really was the size of a fun-size candy bar. I'm pretty sure I'm still technically a virgin. FML
by Anonymous / 01/05/2011 at 3:49pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy
Today, I took my 5 year-old son to the barber shop. When the man finishes with him, I tell the guy, "while we're here, I might as well get a trim too." My son then exclaims very loudly in front of a very full barber's shop, "Dad! You don't need a haircut, you need hair!" FML
by ben / 09/18/2009 at 2:17am / United States (Utah) / Kids