Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Offline (the 08/26/2014 at 8:54pm) | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 1 November 1995 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1648
  • Number of comments : 16
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About SgrA : SgrA*

SgrA's page activity

Visits<b>pearlgalaxy</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 12:07am<b>iunpossible</b> - the 04/10/2014 at 9:41pm<b>emm212</b> - the 03/27/2014 at 3:43am<b>MattBenid</b> - the 03/19/2014 at 4:36pm<b>datfacedoe</b> - the 02/25/2014 at 2:22am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 02/23/2014 at 7:12am<b>Credibleskills</b> - the 02/02/2014 at 9:16am<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/22/2014 at 5:52am<b>Toutejulie</b> - the 12/23/2013 at 5:44pm<b>The_Tenth_Doctor</b> - the 12/21/2013 at 2:34pm<b>Trollx</b> - the 12/06/2013 at 9:25am<b>ReignInBlood</b> - the 12/05/2013 at 4:17pm<b>Candycake</b> - the 12/02/2013 at 8:07pm<b>jaderade323</b> - the 12/02/2013 at 1:19am<b>ladyfingers</b> - the 11/29/2013 at 10:22am<b>brwneyes</b> - the 11/29/2013 at 6:29am<b>carleybeak</b> - the 11/27/2013 at 9:36am<b>music8484</b> - the 11/25/2013 at 12:04am

SgrA's FML badges

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of SgrA's badges

SgrA's favorite FMLs

Today, as my wife and I were getting intimate, I thought I would try a little "dirty talk". I whispered in her ear that I would "dick her down good". She couldn't stop laughing. FML


I agree, your life sucks (28827) - you deserved it (56647)

On 11/05/2013 at 10:26am - intimacy - by Something I said? (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I found out that, although I have the same job title and complete the same work as my male colleagues, I get paid 15% less, purely because I'm a girl. FML


I agree, your life sucks (57054) - you deserved it (8249)

On 10/30/2013 at 6:27pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Havering)

Today, my sex-crazed ex wrote me a letter so bad, it haunts me that I let a guy with such terrible grammar skills touch my boobs. FML


I agree, your life sucks (45949) - you deserved it (11487)

On 10/01/2013 at 6:47am - intimacy - by whatdoesitmatter (woman) - India (Tamil Nadu)

Today, I confessed to my boyfriend that I was in love with his best friend. He confessed that he was too. FML


I agree, your life sucks (47134) - you deserved it (23152)

On 08/21/2013 at 7:45pm - love - by me (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, my superior gave me a box of ethernet cables which were previously attached to mainframes storing classified data. He requested I cut them in half so that the residual data would leak out. Not only does this guy make twice my salary, there was no convincing him otherwise. We cut them up. FML

Today, while taking a walk in the forest, someone approached me and asked to borrow the knife I had clipped to my pocket. I happily obliged, assuming he just needed it as a tool. Instead, he used the knife to mug me, taking my cellphone and my wallet. I was robbed with my own knife. FML

Today, one of my cats gave birth. My other cat responded by eating the new litter in a jealous rage, then got indigestion and vomited. I had to clean up regurgitated kittens. FML

Today, after going out to dinner with my girlfriend, we went back to my place and things started getting hot. I went in the bathroom and put on a green condom. She wouldn't have sex with me because it looked "like a cucumber" and "cucumbers are nasty." FML


I agree, your life sucks (54091) - you deserved it (14817)

On 06/25/2013 at 12:22am - intimacy - by dan (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my boyfriend and I had a threesome. He suggested we have another guy. It ended up devolving into a twosome, and I wasn't part of it. FML


I agree, your life sucks (80381) - you deserved it (18248)

On 06/22/2013 at 2:39am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, while bagging my groceries at a store, a lady came over to me, took a good look at the food I'd bought, picked out an item and put it in her bag. When I confronted her, she called security on me and told them I wanted to steal her stuff. I got thrown out and she walked away with a smirk. FML


I agree, your life sucks (52298) - you deserved it (3426)

On 06/20/2013 at 4:35am - money - by what_the_hell (woman) - Finland (Southern Finland)

Today, I won an argument against a sexist co-worker. When I left later on, I jumped into my car to drive home, but managed to reverse it into a parked excavator. Guess who's going to hear virginal jokes about women drivers from now on. FML


I agree, your life sucks (35950) - you deserved it (17207)

On 06/19/2013 at 12:18pm - work - by fuck the man-dominated construction business (woman) - Finland (Southern Finland)

Today, my grandma's new dildo arrived in the mail. We buried her yesterday. FML


I agree, your life sucks (73914) - you deserved it (4363)

On 06/17/2013 at 12:43pm - intimacy - by hinting (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, while sexting my girlfriend, I accidently sent a picture to her father instead of her. He sent back a link to a penis enlargement company's website. FML


I agree, your life sucks (32637) - you deserved it (69278)

On 06/04/2013 at 8:15am - misc - by tinypenis - United States (New York)

Today, my 6-year-old son was so angry at me for not buying him overpriced candy at the airport, that he told a security guard I had a machine gun in my suitcase. The interrogation was not pleasant. FML


I agree, your life sucks (64190) - you deserved it (7983)

On 06/03/2013 at 5:16pm - kids - by VDM (man) - Sent from mobile version

C comme Line's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Céline's illustrated FML
  • Hi gang! It’s a day of national pride over near the FML offices. There's a time for everything, and even if the desire to piss about to release the tension is huge, we mustn’t forget that we can…

Friday 27 November 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: