SemiAuto

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SemiAuto

3Fucked!

SemiAuto
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1388
  • Number of comments : 31
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

About SemiAuto : "One day, I'm gonna run off the bus into the woods and never come back. And when I come back, I'm gonna be the knife master." - The Rev

SemiAuto's page activity

Visits<b>shebewoofle</b> - the 04/18/2016 at 4:25pm<b>Oliok</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 2:36pm<b>LivToFail</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 1:44am<b>CogadhTallon</b> - the 12/30/2015 at 9:10am<b>SirFawkes</b> - the 10/14/2015 at 11:28am<b>senor_octubre</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 9:05pm<b>KyokoSakuraChan</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 6:33pm<b>HikaruNoGo</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 5:38am<b>FitFriday</b> - the 03/03/2015 at 4:35pm<b>iAmPaul</b> - the 02/07/2015 at 9:11pm<b>BrickTamlandLamp</b> - the 02/05/2015 at 12:16am<b>907Drifter</b> - the 01/20/2015 at 2:19pm<b>Darkness_Hate</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 7:04am<b>alayshajlp</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 1:55am<b>23lf</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 1:38am<b>whos_ur_daddy1</b> - the 12/27/2014 at 8:38am<b>Vanillanougat</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 3:46pm<b>ZY1431</b> - the 12/07/2014 at 12:55am

Fucked!<b>HikaruNoGo</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 11:38am<b>23lf</b> - the 12/26/2014 at 1:16am<b>Oliok</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 1:53am

SemiAuto's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of SemiAuto's badges

SemiAuto's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked a short girl to prom by making a "You must be this tall to say no" sign. She grabbed a chair, stood on it, and then said no. FML

by anonymous / 04/19/2016 at 11:09pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, I invited my sister to my wedding. She is not coming, because I didn't reply to her email three years ago. The one she sent to my whole family, saying that I was a dangerous psychopath. FML

by Coco / 04/19/2016 at 4:58pm / Denmark (Nordjylland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that I wasn't going to be a father. My best friend is going to be the father to my girlfriend's child, though. FML

Today, I discovered my elderly neighbour likes to roam around his yard naked and wash his balls with the sprinkler. I'm never going to grab a snack in my kitchen again. FML

by Sprinkles / 02/04/2015 at 2:44am / Australia / Miscellaneous

Today, I was making out with a girl I've liked for a long time. At one point she stopped kissing me and said, "You kiss like my brother". I sat there dumbstruck as she went back to kissing me. FML

by Anonymous / 02/03/2015 at 1:23pm / United States (Wyoming) / Love

Today, I gave a presentation to my college class about life with Tourette syndrome. I only got 3 minutes into it before my asswipe classmates started yelling stuff like "Shit!", "Cock!", and "Bob Saget!" I gave up and went back to my seat in tears as our bored instructor said "Next." FML

by Anonymous / 01/10/2015 at 5:12pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was working out on a horse farm. I slipped and fell on some ice, whacking my head on the metal gate in the process. As I was getting up, I accidentally grabbed the electric fence. FML

by immaloser95 / 01/06/2015 at 4:06pm / United States (Michigan) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I felt a horrible pain while having sex with my wife, and I had to stop. I thought it was a hernia or something, but she called me a liar and accused me of everything from not finding her attractive, to me cheating on her. It turned out I had appendicitis. She still won't apologize. FML

by Anonymous / 12/17/2014 at 3:09pm / United States / Health

Today, I got broken up with. In a text message. She texted my grandma, who then had to forward said text to me. I got broken up via grandma. FML

by braceforcarnage / 12/02/2014 at 10:42am / United States / Love

Today, I sat down for a poop. The toilet seat slid off immediately, taking me with it. I lay on the bathroom floor for several moments stunned, still pooping. FML

by pooplife / 11/30/2014 at 2:32pm / United Kingdom (Nottingham) / Miscellaneous

Today, I started to get horny while watching TV with my husband. I tried turning him on by telling him I wanted his cock. He cheerfully replied without looking away from the TV, "If only I gave a fuck, babe, if only I gave a fuck!" FML

by 404: fuck not given / 11/23/2014 at 11:34am / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy

Today, while using a public toilet, a guy started pissing beside me at the urinal. The breach of bathroom etiquette then escalated to him taking a long look down at me and saying "Nice sack, dude." followed by him finishing up and leaving without even washing his hands. FML

by Anonymous / 11/20/2014 at 11:35am / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mother locked me out of the house. Why? The dog and her needed some time to talk. FML

by Anonymous / 10/25/2014 at 8:51pm / United States (Indiana) / Animals

Today, I sent my boyfriend a picture of my vagina. He replied, "What's that?" FML

by Anonymous / 10/05/2014 at 10:42pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, the guy I really like acknowledged my existence for the first time. Too bad it was through a text saying "lol ur a fat fukc". FML

by Anonymous / 10/05/2014 at 12:02pm / United Kingdom (Birmingham) / Love