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Self_Reliant

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Self_Reliant

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Self_ReliantSelf_Reliant
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 16 April 1986 (29 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1405
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Self_Reliant : Live. Laugh. Love. Learn.

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Self_Reliant's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my boss for a promotion. "You don't work here but I can give you a job application." I've been working here for 8 years. FML

#21448654
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15081) - you deserved it (1109)

On 07/28/2015 at 4:44pm - work - by Application - United States (Ohio)

Today, the guy I've been dating for 3 weeks showed up at my house at 7 AM. I was about to give him a kiss when he said, "Good morning, is Sarah here?" I was confused until I realized he didn't recognize me because I had no make up on. FML

Today, at 3 in the morning, I was getting out of bed to use the bathroom, when my boyfriend grabbed my arm, looked at me wide-eyed and begged, "Don't... They'll take your skin..." He doesn't remember saying it, and now I'm scared shitless to use the bathroom at night. FML

#21439825
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27624) - you deserved it (2381)

On 07/10/2015 at 11:49pm - misc - by Julianapilikusplatosophophes (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, instead of canceling for the third consecutive time due to work-related reasons, my boyfriend sent his twin brother on our date. They both thought I wouldn't notice. FML

#21438625
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26281) - you deserved it (1671)

On 07/08/2015 at 4:50pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I rang up a good friend to ask her to be one of the two bridesmaids at my upcoming wedding. Before I could ask, she let me know that she would not be attending my wedding, as, "Weddings are expensive, so I'm not attending ones for people that are just acquaintances". FML

#21435764
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26071) - you deserved it (1978)

On 07/03/2015 at 6:30am - misc - by NeedMoreFriends (woman) - United Kingdom (Wakefield)

Today, I decided to break up with my boyfriend. The main reason being that he doesn't value my time, and fails to see how canceling at the last minute is rude and a major inconvenience. I wanted to be respectful enough by breaking things off face to face. He cancelled, at the last minute. FML

#21433097
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25310) - you deserved it (2080)

On 06/28/2015 at 1:06am - love - by Waste Someone Else's Time - United States

Today, another idiot was admitted to my hospital with a foreign object up his ass. Yet again, the excuse went along the lines of "I tripped and fell on it." Please, someone tell me how you can accidentally trip anus-first onto the end of a cucumber, which just so happens to have a condom on it. FML

#21432533
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31309) - you deserved it (2151)

On 06/26/2015 at 9:21pm - work - by Idiot says "HIPAA violation" (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was using the toilet. I was still insanely pissed off over an argument with my girlfriend, which kind of explains why I was wiping my ass so furiously that my fingers broke through the tissue and ended up in my ass, causing me to shriek like a little girl. FML

#21428778
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20403) - you deserved it (12407)

On 06/19/2015 at 9:22pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, the 4-year-old I was babysitting came up to me all happy, saying she went to the bathroom like a "big girl". Knowing she was just potty trained, I asked if she'd remembered to flush. Looking at me confused, she said, "But it's in my room." FML

#21424205
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25719) - you deserved it (1832)

On 06/10/2015 at 11:04pm - kids - by AdoKitty (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my husband and I broke the news to my 10-year-old son that in about 8 months, he'll have a baby brother or sister. I knew he never wanted a sibling, but I didn't expect him to throw a tantrum, then look at me through teary eyes and scream, "Why can't you keep your fucking legs closed?" FML

#21423894
317 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35255) - you deserved it (6970)

On 06/10/2015 at 12:13pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my mom found my weed stash and went berserk, grounding me and saying she's going to have my bedroom door removed. Less than an hour later, I found her laughing and smoking the same stash with my dad in the backyard. FML

#21421662
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27477) - you deserved it (8543)

On 06/06/2015 at 5:11am - misc - by lehonX9 (man) - Germany (Niedersachsen)

Today, at a party I got blind drunk and I gave a guy a blowjob for the first time. I'm a 100% heterosexual male. FML

#21406764
301 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19871) - you deserved it (36934)

On 05/08/2015 at 12:59pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - India (Delhi)

Today, I brought my girlfriend home to introduce to my parents. My dad thought it would be hilarious to fill some clear bags full of flour, then pretend he was sampling a cocaine shipment when she arrived. She excused herself very quickly and isn't answering my calls. FML

#21399378
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31236) - you deserved it (2500)

On 04/25/2015 at 6:34am - love - by a critically injured shitehawk (man) - United Kingdom (York)

Today, I thought my dad was finally showing interest in the business I started last year when he asked about my next event. Nope, he just wanted to know if I would hire his step-granddaughter. Her first question: "So, I won't have to do any like, real work right?" Gee, thanks Dad. FML

#21393221
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26259) - you deserved it (1905)

On 04/13/2015 at 9:50pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I ran into the woman who hit my car and drove off three days ago. She was my bank teller. I called 911; she pressed the silent alarm. Guess whose story the cops believed. FML

#21392789
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36202) - you deserved it (2561)

On 04/13/2015 at 5:00am - misc - by yupthissucks - United States (Georgia)



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