Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

ScottMC

Offline (the 04/20/2015 at 1:41pm) | Search for a member

ScottMC

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 10957
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

ScottMC's page activity

Visits<b>blcksocks</b> - the 04/11/2014 at 11:19pm<b>FindingYujin</b> - the 01/10/2014 at 8:50am<b>uzee</b> - the 01/01/2014 at 4:15pm<b>sarahperez</b> - the 11/23/2013 at 10:47pm<b>a_wiener_d0g</b> - the 11/18/2013 at 9:50am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 10/27/2013 at 5:52pm

ScottMC's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of ScottMC's badges

ScottMC's favorite FMLs

Today, I told my younger brother that I'm a lesbian. Now he keeps asking me if I want to play rock, paper, vagina. FML

#21390758
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28164) - you deserved it (4618)

On 04/09/2015 at 4:24pm - love - by Sarah (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, things got heated with my boyfriend for the first time. Turns out he's even more inexperienced than I thought; when I started grinding against him, he frowned and said, "Um... why're you doing that? We've still got clothes on..." FML

#21387249
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29625) - you deserved it (3297)

On 04/03/2015 at 9:57pm - intimacy - by lameows - United States

Today, my kid made a new friend at school. When I asked her to describe her new friend, she said, "She looks kinda like you, only pretty." FML

#21372313
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (118) - you deserved it (2421)

On 03/11/2015 at 1:32am - kids - by CasaDeLoser (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I got my first handjob. I also found out today that a girl can pull your skin hard enough to cause it to bleed profusely. FML

#21371903
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35358) - you deserved it (3935)

On 03/10/2015 at 3:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous -

Today, I woke up this morning in a panic. Last night, I heard scratching at my door, but I thought it was just my cat and went back to sleep. This morning, it hit me that my cat is 600 miles away living with my mom in Iowa. I'm terrified to even sleep now. FML

#21370427
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (114) - you deserved it (2586)

On 03/08/2015 at 10:41am - animals - by no salt, no burning, just STFU (man) - United States

Today, I got a haircut. The guy quickly cut off most of the hair above my forehead. When I angrily asked him what he was doing, he said, "Quitting." FML

#21369589
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35422) - you deserved it (2287)

On 03/06/2015 at 10:22pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my mother walked in on me watching porn. As punishment, she sat down and made me watch the rest of it with her as she gave play-by-play commentary. FML

#21368964
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43310) - you deserved it (19608)

On 03/05/2015 at 10:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, while cleaning my son's room, I found an envelope labelled "PRIVATE AND CONFIDENTIAL" under his bed. I opened it, only to find it was a glitter bomb. I couldn't get it all cleaned off myself before he got home. He just said "HAH! Serves you right!" and went to his room smirking. FML

#21365242
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18781) - you deserved it (55553)

On 02/28/2015 at 1:11pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my girlfriend said she was going to start appreciating the little things in life. She's starting with my penis. FML

#21364983
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34450) - you deserved it (4992)

On 02/28/2015 at 12:03am - intimacy - by FreshDonuts (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I came home from work to find that my girlfriend had sold all of my N64 and Atari games and both the consoles and bought me a PS4 with the money. While I was standing there in shock, she kissed me on the cheek and said, "I know, I'm the greatest." FML

#21361122
462 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44442) - you deserved it (4026)

On 02/22/2015 at 3:41pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I looked my boyfriend in the eyes and said "I love y-" He cut me off with, "Babe, a blowjob's worth a thousand words" and held eye contact until I awkwardly excused myself. FML

#21361029
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33848) - you deserved it (3872)

On 02/22/2015 at 12:31pm - intimacy - by bugger -

Today, I found out that my boyfriend of two years has a beautiful daughter. That's cool, except she's 1 year old. FML

#21360646
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33471) - you deserved it (2338)

On 02/21/2015 at 9:44pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out the hard way that blood-filled deer ticks can look a lot like black jelly beans. FML

#21360309
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30217) - you deserved it (7591)

On 02/21/2015 at 10:12am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my dad gave my younger brother condoms and a pat on the back, even though he doesn't have a girlfriend. This is after called me a whore after he saw me kissing my long-term boyfriend last week. FML

#21360278
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39242) - you deserved it (3656)

On 02/21/2015 at 8:46am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, my mom told me that, even though my brother sells drugs, he's still her favorite child. FML

#21359996
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33046) - you deserved it (2737)

On 02/20/2015 at 7:35pm - misc - by pissed - United States (Illinois)



FML's blog

  • Tania's illustrated FML
  • Hi gang! How are you all doing? This week has been quite eventful for some people. Uber has been causing taxi drivers here and there to get their knickers in a twist, notable over here in France, which caused…

Friday 26 June 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: