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Schiffy

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Schiffy
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 4 March 1994 (20 years)
  • Number of visits : 1053
  • Number of comments : 529
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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Schiffy's FML badges

I never take things to heart

Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.

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Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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Schiffy's favorite FMLs

Today, I was visiting my cousin's farm. Going out for a morning stroll, I took an apple with me to munch along the way. As I was eating it, I heard a distant thumping sound and was suddenly slammed into the ground. When I looked up, a horse was eating my apple. I got mugged by a horse. FML

#20836718
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50702) - you deserved it (5705)

On 08/14/2013 at 5:11am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boss put me on suspension for violating company policy by having non-work related mail in my inbox. They were spam emails. FML

#20478634
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25790) - you deserved it (1749)

On 01/25/2013 at 8:04pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I'm still freshly circumcised. My penis is still very sensitive, and I can't squat to grab stuff off the floor because of the pressure against my jeans. Kicking the objects up into my hands was working well, that is until I spilled a pack of 300 toothpicks all over the floor. FML

#19933924
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21768) - you deserved it (5962)

On 07/13/2012 at 7:14pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I got mugged at Disney World, the happiest place on Earth. FML

#19434352
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31512) - you deserved it (2906)

On 04/09/2012 at 1:15am - money - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went to family therapy because my mom wanted the family to be closer. When asked what her biggest disappointment was in life, she turned to me and said, "Having a gay son" then patted my hand, smiled, and said "No offense, honey." FML

#19416879
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36602) - you deserved it (6306)

On 04/06/2012 at 10:24am - misc - by Sadboy (man) - United States

Today, I received a letter from the state saying my 14-year-old daughter is now legally recognized as a male. I have no idea what happened. FML

#18766108
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36766) - you deserved it (3391)

On 01/10/2012 at 12:43pm - kids - by Anonymous - India

Today, my parents gave me an iPhone. They then checked my grades online, and promptly took it away. FML

#18613210
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10949) - you deserved it (44123)

On 12/26/2011 at 1:35am - misc - by Paige - United States (California)

Today, I failed my driving test before even leaving the DMV parking lot. FML

#18275233
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11107) - you deserved it (25015)

On 11/17/2011 at 7:19pm - misc - by that guy -

Today, I was yelled at by a customer because we didn't have any ketchup packets. I work in a coffee shop. FML

#18096319
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23890) - you deserved it (1907)

On 10/28/2011 at 1:07pm - work - by Anonymous - United States



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  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

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