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SayPeanuts

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SayPeanuts
  • Town/Country : Ireland
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 18 November 1993 (20 years)
  • Number of visits : 2056
  • Number of comments : 133
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About SayPeanuts : "Look, now he’s going up on that little ladder. Up he goes with that little wiggle of his. The wiggle of Judas. The Judas boogie."

SayPeanuts's last visitors

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SayPeanuts's FML badges

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You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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SayPeanuts's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend texted me "I think we should move in". Then, ten seconds later she sent another text that said, "Sorry, typo. Move on". FML

Today, my mother-in-law yelled from across the house for me to come quickly. She sounded frantic, so I rushed and asked what was wrong. She said, "Nothing." and that she just wanted to remind me that she hates my guts. She'll be living here with me and my wife for the next two months. FML

#20830989
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43700) - you deserved it (3181)

On 08/10/2013 at 5:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, my five-year-old daughter called the police to report her stolen nose. FML

#20769088
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48960) - you deserved it (8615)

On 07/07/2013 at 5:57pm - kids - by nosestealer (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my grandma's new dildo arrived in the mail. We buried her yesterday. FML

#20731352
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61854) - you deserved it (2810)

On 06/17/2013 at 12:43pm - intimacy - by hinting (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was going on a blind date with a girl. She walked up to the table, said "Nah, no thanks" and left. FML

#20675286
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46907) - you deserved it (4111)

On 05/20/2013 at 12:02pm - misc - by well okay then - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my girlfriend was visiting, and while in the bathroom, she clogged the toilet. Since there was no plunger in the room, she unclogged it with the only thing she could find: my mother's hairbrush. FML

#20660172
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37671) - you deserved it (4530)

On 05/13/2013 at 1:02am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was in a bathroom stall and I accidentally dropped my new tampon on the ground. Just as I was about to reach for it, I heard a voice on the other side of the stall say, "Oh great, I needed that" and then a hand reached under my stall and grabbed it. It was my last one. FML

#20647074
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55477) - you deserved it (4329)

On 05/07/2013 at 1:10am - misc - by the girl next door (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, through sheer luck, I got talking to an actor from the Harry Potter films who I've had a crush on since I was about ten. I tried to play it cool, and pretend I didn't know who he was. Then my phone rang, with the Harry Potter theme tune. FML

#20633236
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20055) - you deserved it (37394)

On 04/30/2013 at 6:23pm - misc - by itsellie27 (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, as I was walking down the street, a car full of hot girls pulled up and asked if I wanted to party; obviously, I said yes. They then shot at me with party poppers and threw party food all over me. FML

#20622653
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38158) - you deserved it (8283)

On 04/26/2013 at 4:36am - misc - by KingUrge (man) - United States (California)

Today, my social teacher thought it would be a great idea to have a casual debate about Margaret Thatcher and her legacy. Within 10 minutes, the entire class was yelling, screaming, throwing stuff at each other. I got hit in the face with a binder. FML

#20584117
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34701) - you deserved it (3316)

On 04/10/2013 at 8:40pm - misc - by great idea - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my little sister figured out how to use the printer. I came home to pictures of Nicolas Cage all over my room. FML

#20571278
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30348) - you deserved it (4982)

On 04/02/2013 at 5:22am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my parents asked me if I was sexually active. My grandma then screamed from upstairs, "She's not even physically active!" FML

#20548943
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45063) - you deserved it (13554)

On 03/18/2013 at 4:59am - intimacy - by Susan (woman) - Ireland

Today, I told my parents that I was going to hang out with some friends. My dad guffawed and said, "Ooh, look at Mary, pretending she has a social life." Thanks, Dad. FML

#20498469
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24100) - you deserved it (2602)

On 02/08/2013 at 5:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Havering)

Today, I met my girlfriend's dad for the first time. His shirt said "D.A.D.D, Dads Against Daughters Dating, shoot the first one and word will spread". FML

#20480699
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28843) - you deserved it (3048)

On 01/27/2013 at 12:57am - love - by pdub523 - United States (Texas)

Today, I was at a party with my crush. The collar on his shirt was sticking up so I fixed it for him. He gave me a hug and said, "Aww you're so good to me. You're like my mother. You can be my college mother." I got mother-zoned. FML

#20458655
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44781) - you deserved it (5466)

On 01/14/2013 at 7:56am - love - by shiney100893 (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)



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