Sammy61400

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Offline (the 02/26/2015 at 11:34pm)

Sammy61400

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 14 June 1990 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 984
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

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Sammy61400's page activity

Visits<b>indigohippopo</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 1:43am<b>RWBYRose</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 2:19pm<b>kitkat818</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 2:48pm<b>Exaspera</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 1:46am<b>hurtfeet</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 4:44am<b>TanzWolf</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 1:18am<b>Gentleman_Snivy</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 12:26am<b>StormGirl142</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 7:40am<b>AHotCupOfCoffee</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 4:07pm<b>KagamineRinny</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 4:44pm<b>cakefete2</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 10:24pm<b>bonbon4644</b> - the 07/05/2014 at 1:50pm<b>LynxieLynx</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 4:36pm<b>aa1717</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 12:30pm<b>Kirito_Kazuto</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 12:52am<b>ironfey</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 11:01pm

Sammy61400's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

See all of Sammy61400's badges

Sammy61400's favorite FMLs

Today, I realized how bad my insomnia had got when I tried answering my water bottle when my alarm went off. FML

by Overworked / 09/30/2013 at 1:01am / United States / Health

Today, someone told me that my initials really fit my personality. I took it as a strange compliment, until I realized my initials spell "ew". FML

by ew / 08/11/2013 at 9:09am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was using a public toilet, when someone in the next stall reached under, grabbed at my low-hanging toilet paper and pulled at it at an insane speed, whispering some kind of weird chant. Then he suddenly stopped, screamed, and ran out. What the hell happened in there? FML

by Anonymous / 06/13/2013 at 12:01pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, while practicing a song in choir, I got a boner. Trying to cover it up, I tried sitting down. My choir teacher got mad and made me stand in front of the whole class. FML

by Soundofaboner / 04/23/2013 at 12:08pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, as per usual, my mother went to see her psychic, who told her that one of her children is harbouring a "dark secret". Now we're all grounded until one of us confesses our obviously non-existent secret. FML

by daughter of a gullible cunt / 01/13/2013 at 4:02pm / Australia / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out my friend swapped my girlfriend and probation officer's numbers in my phone. My girlfriend is wondering why I asked her permission to leave the country, and my probation officer said she can't wait to see me again. FML

by Anonymous / 09/02/2012 at 1:34pm / United States (Virginia) / Love

Today, I had to force myself to take a dump at school, even though I have severe restroom anxiety and shyness. I had finally relaxed enough to go when the tornado drills went off mid-dump, and 46 students and teachers packed into the bathroom with me. FML

by DamnTornadoAlley / 08/30/2012 at 1:55am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally hooked up with the girl of my dreams. We went back to her place, and I explored every inch of her body; luscious lips, hourglass curves, genital warts... The worst part was when she got angry when I refused to continue, shouting, "No wonder you're still a virgin!" FML

by checkup / 07/14/2012 at 8:50pm / United Kingdom (Worcestershire) / Intimacy

Today, a little girl walked up to me at Target and asked me what my name was. I smiled and told her my name was Kristen. She looked at the skirt I was wearing and said, "Kristen, can you wear pants tomorrow?" FML

by whattdafuuukkkk / 06/05/2012 at 7:56am / United States / Work

Today, my gynecologist told me that the ecosystem in my vagina is unbalanced, and that I have to do some reconstruction. Uhm what? FML

by Anonymous / 11/23/2011 at 4:36am / United States / Health

Today, I found Jesus. The bad news, he was in the form of a concrete statue falling on my car. FML

by religionbites621 / 11/22/2011 at 12:18pm / United States (Tennessee) / Transportation

Today, I found out that a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser will erase the paint right off your wall. FML

by jazzybell / 11/20/2011 at 7:29pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was hurriedly doing laundry. I threw a second load in the dryer and slammed the door shut. All of a sudden, I heard scratching and whining coming from the dryer. My cat probably hates me now. FML

by benji / 11/01/2011 at 3:02pm / United States (Michigan) / Animals

Today, my parents staged a family intervention and gave me the grandest bollocking I've ever experienced in all my 22 years of life. They did this because my sister showed them a photo of me jokingly posing with three bottles of Bud Light at a party. Apparently, I'm an alcoholic in denial. FML

by wtf / 10/24/2011 at 6:46pm / United Kingdom (York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I heard on a TV show that it's possible to fit a standard light-bulb in your mouth, but it can't be removed afterwards. I just had to try this out. And then visit the local hospital to get it removed. FML

by Stuck / 09/08/2011 at 6:00am / United States / Health