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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 25 July 1995 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 632
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About Sam0011 : Hi, I like to go on FML because it makes my day feel a ton less shitty.

Sam0011's page activity

Visits<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 5:48pm<b>OhMyOhMila</b> - the 12/26/2013 at 4:21pm<b>loriprieto</b> - the 11/04/2013 at 11:03pm<b>Kitty19</b> - the 11/02/2013 at 5:04pm

Sam0011's FML badges

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”


You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

See all of Sam0011's badges

Sam0011's favorite FMLs

Today, my neighbor finally password-protected his wifi. Right in the middle of my timed, online exam. FML


I agree, your life sucks (28948) - you deserved it (91430)

On 11/21/2013 at 5:30pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I sat down with my daughter to have the sex talk, because she recently started seeing a guy. I mentioned at one point how disappointed I would be if she got pregnant. She went wide-eyed and asked, "Didn't mom tell you?" FML


I agree, your life sucks (61621) - you deserved it (6456)

On 11/02/2013 at 5:10pm - kids - by unknown (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I got a new cell phone number and sent a text to my wife. Playing around, I said, "Hey sexy are you alone yet? I'm ready to come over." She responded with, "Hey, yeah he is at work - did you get a new number?" FML


I agree, your life sucks (93151) - you deserved it (6784)

On 11/01/2013 at 3:01am - intimacy - by PapaW - United States (Utah)

Today, I was playing World of Warcraft, when all of a sudden, I remembered I was supposed to be at a wedding. I was 25 minutes late to my own wedding. FML


I agree, your life sucks (23954) - you deserved it (95714)

On 09/14/2013 at 1:23am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, while chatting with a friend online, I told her that Kristen Stewart isn't going to star in the 50 Shades movie as she originally thought. She then spammed me with so many "NO"/"NO WAY" messages that my crappy laptop froze up, forcing me to reboot and lose a ton of unsaved essay notes. FML


I agree, your life sucks (42788) - you deserved it (11883)

On 09/13/2013 at 5:31pm - misc - by CHEERS, TUMBLTARD (woman) -

Today, I read a seemingly serious article online about giving your smartphone some extra charge by putting it in the microwave for one minute. My phone is now fried. FML


I agree, your life sucks (19473) - you deserved it (140552)

On 09/02/2013 at 4:37pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I asked my boss for a raise, explaining that another shop offered me a job at a higher rate, but I would stay if he would offer me the same. Instead, he fired me then called the other shop and said I was fired for failing a drug test. FML


I agree, your life sucks (56835) - you deserved it (7381)

On 08/27/2013 at 11:21pm - work - by nowork - United States (New York)

Today, a classmate posted a recording of a recent lecture on my university's Facebook page, so we could listen again and take notes at home. A few minutes in, I heard myself asking a question. I then heard snorting and some girl muttering "dumb cunt" under her breath. FML


I agree, your life sucks (36760) - you deserved it (4213)

On 02/27/2013 at 3:52pm - misc - by DumbCuntApparently (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, someone stole the massive pumpkin I've been painstakingly growing all year. What did they do with it? They put it in the middle of a busy intersection. FML


Today, I was watching a kid at school walk like a gangster. My teacher was standing there, so I stood behind the kid and walked like him, laughing to myself, at which point my teacher took me to one side and told me the kid was handicapped. FML

Today, I noticed that after a month of using my gel, it never seems to empty. I then found out my older brother and his friends had been pumping their man-juice into it. FML


I agree, your life sucks (73036) - you deserved it (6726)

On 02/04/2011 at 9:08am - intimacy - by theish -

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job. As I reached my climax, she thought it would be funny to turn my 'weapon' against me. Boom, headshot. FML


I agree, your life sucks (43783) - you deserved it (28054) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 4:53am - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, I found out that my wife was having sex with my friend. It turned out that my genius cat realized it wasn't me there and attacked his balls, severely cutting them. I now have to kill my cat and pay for his medical bills to sew his balls back. FML


I agree, your life sucks (73902) - you deserved it (3975)

On 01/08/2011 at 8:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I realized that in French, my name means "penis." This wouldn't be so bad if my dad wasn't fluent in French. FML


I agree, your life sucks (43889) - you deserved it (3687)

On 08/05/2010 at 2:24pm - love - by kiki - United States (Massachusetts)

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Tuesday 24 November 2015

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