About Sal_Plissken : 18, a visionary robbed by fate. Look for your light, and keep it safe. I'm a listener, so if you need someone to talk to, I'll be there to listen. I don't hide the truth, so you can expect a sincere response at all times; it's not easy but someone has to do it. Don't let anyone else tell you who are, you make a name for yourself and you earn respect, if they don't want to respect it, reply in kind.
Sal_Plissken's FML badges
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Sal_Plissken's favorite FMLs
Today, I was travelling. At airport security, the woman patting me down felt something "down there" and asked me what I was wearing. I told her it was a sanitary napkin. She put her hands inside my pants just to be sure. FML
by sufia / 09/29/2016 at 7:14am / Pakistan / Transportation
Today, in science class, I was bored and playing with a paper towel, dipping it into a container of water. When my teacher caught me and asked what I was doing, I panicked and said I was 'drying the water'. FML
by slitherasssnape / 09/13/2016 at 2:53pm / United Kingdom (Milton Keynes) / Work
by Foot In Mouth / 07/12/2016 at 10:46pm / United States (Arkansas) / Work
Today, my sister played a prank by pretending to break into my house. I ended up nailing her in the chest with my baseball bat. Now all of my family is bitching and wants me to pay the medical bills. FML
by BlueBaronBitch / 06/24/2016 at 10:59am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
Today, I've been awake for 4 days. My doctor recently put me on enough sleeping pills to kill a small country, but when I take them it's like a shot of adrenaline. I'm wide awake and tired as all hell at the same time. FML
by dead / 03/18/2016 at 3:40pm / United Kingdom / Health
by Anonymous / 02/23/2016 at 12:16am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 01/31/2016 at 4:33am / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous
by hrmpf / 01/19/2016 at 9:37am / Germany (Bremen) / Miscellaneous
Today, I almost died. My friends dragged me unconcious, hypothermic and half-drowned out of the sea. A helicopter took me to the hospital where they brought me back to life. My family's reaction? "You aren't dying so we don't have to come to the hospital." They wouldn't even bring me clothes. FML
by KereKris / 01/14/2016 at 7:11am / Netherlands / Miscellaneous
Today, my boyfriend finally proposed to me in front of his whole family with the ring his mother had helped him pick out. Two hours later, I found emails of nudes from another women that had been sent to him a week prior, on his phone. Our flight for home leaves in a week. FML
by FMeRight? / 12/28/2015 at 3:15pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Hormones apparently / 12/07/2015 at 9:32pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy
by _Asykes_ / 11/24/2015 at 7:56pm / Miscellaneous
by FitnessFirst / 11/24/2015 at 7:38pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, I was fired from my job because I, in my bosses words, "Abided by company policy to such an…