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Offline (the 10/25/2016 at 5:01am)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2471
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Sal_Plissken : 18, a visionary robbed by fate. Look for your light, and keep it safe. I'm a listener, so if you need someone to talk to, I'll be there to listen. I don't hide the truth, so you can expect a sincere response at all times; it's not easy but someone has to do it. Don't let anyone else tell you who are, you make a name for yourself and you earn respect, if they don't want to respect it, reply in kind.

Sal_Plissken's page activity

Visits<b>terryaly</b> - the 09/24/2015 at 4:40pm<b>GoldCyclone</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 11:07pm<b>macncheeze97</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 10:23pm<b>hotheadslav</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 6:49pm<b>yellosno</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 3:31am<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 6:51pm<b>NikhilBajaj</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 10:49pm<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 10:37pm<b>delilablue95</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 3:58am<b>kkkkkkkkkka</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 12:30am<b>tantanpanda</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 12:19am<b>hurtfeet</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 6:11am<b>123765</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 7:15pm<b>JMichael</b> - the 10/02/2014 at 3:16pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 12:10am<b>itscare1217</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 1:50pm<b>letmehavemytea</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 10:21am<b>MrGauss</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 5:02pm

Fucked!<b>GoldCyclone</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 5:07am<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 12:52am

Sal_Plissken's FML badges

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Sal_Plissken's favorite FMLs

Today, I was travelling. At airport security, the woman patting me down felt something "down there" and asked me what I was wearing. I told her it was a sanitary napkin. She put her hands inside my pants just to be sure. FML

by sufia / 09/29/2016 at 7:14am / Pakistan / Transportation

Today, in science class, I was bored and playing with a paper towel, dipping it into a container of water. When my teacher caught me and asked what I was doing, I panicked and said I was 'drying the water'. FML

by slitherasssnape / 09/13/2016 at 2:53pm / United Kingdom (Milton Keynes) / Work

Today, at the funeral home where I work, I asked my boss if it was time to "bring out the stiff". I didn't realize the guy's family was not only in the building, but within earshot as well. FML

by Anonymous / 08/30/2016 at 11:01am / Work

Today, while meeting a new client, their assistant said I looked familiar. Before my brain could stop me, I blurted out, "I do porn." FML

by Foot In Mouth / 07/12/2016 at 10:46pm / United States (Arkansas) / Work

Today, my sister played a prank by pretending to break into my house. I ended up nailing her in the chest with my baseball bat. Now all of my family is bitching and wants me to pay the medical bills. FML

by BlueBaronBitch / 06/24/2016 at 10:59am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I've been awake for 4 days. My doctor recently put me on enough sleeping pills to kill a small country, but when I take them it's like a shot of adrenaline. I'm wide awake and tired as all hell at the same time. FML

by dead / 03/18/2016 at 3:40pm / United Kingdom / Health

Today, I realized that I will be leaving for the US Marine Corps in June, and the presidential election is in November. I could potentially be serving with Trump as my Commander-in-Chief. FML

by Anonymous / 02/23/2016 at 12:16am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I accidentally walked in on my sister shaving, naked. I don't know what's worse, the fact I've now seen her nude, or that she looks ten times better than any girl I've ever slept with. FML

by Anonymous / 01/31/2016 at 4:33am / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to the hairdresser for the first time in the country I just moved to. Guess I don't speak the language as well as I thought. FML

by hrmpf / 01/19/2016 at 9:37am / Germany (Bremen) / Miscellaneous

Today, I almost died. My friends dragged me unconcious, hypothermic and half-drowned out of the sea. A helicopter took me to the hospital where they brought me back to life. My family's reaction? "You aren't dying so we don't have to come to the hospital." They wouldn't even bring me clothes. FML

Today, I found out my wife has been taking "love thy neighbour" very literally with the bloke next door. FML

by Anonymous / 12/29/2015 at 9:15am / Love

Today, my boyfriend finally proposed to me in front of his whole family with the ring his mother had helped him pick out. Two hours later, I found emails of nudes from another women that had been sent to him a week prior, on his phone. Our flight for home leaves in a week. FML

by FMeRight? / 12/28/2015 at 3:15pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was so inexplicably horny that I had to shuffle awkwardly and use my bag to hide the wetness of my pants as I left work for the day. FML

by Hormones apparently / 12/07/2015 at 9:32pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, I started a new school, after moving from England to New York. People only talked to me just to hear my accent. FML

by _Asykes_ / 11/24/2015 at 7:56pm / Miscellaneous

Today, I painfully watched my doctor burn a hole in my nail to drain the blood underneath. This is the prescribed treatment for the injury of hammering your thumb. FML

by FitnessFirst / 11/24/2015 at 7:38pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work