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Sal_Plissken

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Sal_Plissken

1Fucked!

Sal_PlisskenSal_Plissken
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 872
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Sal_Plissken : 18, a visionary robbed by fate. Look for your light, and keep it safe. I'm a listener, so if you need someone to talk to, I'll be there to listen. I don't hide the truth, so you can expect a sincere response at all times; it's not easy but someone has to do it. Don't let anyone else tell you who are, you make a name for yourself and you earn respect, if they don't want to respect it, reply in kind.

Sal_Plissken's page activity

Visits<b>macncheeze97</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 11:41pm<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 6:51pm<b>NikhilBajaj</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 10:49pm<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 10:37pm<b>delilablue95</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 3:58am<b>kkkkkkkkkka</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 12:30am<b>tantanpanda</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 12:19am<b>hurtfeet</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 6:11am<b>123765</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 7:15pm<b>JMichael</b> - the 10/02/2014 at 3:16pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 12:10am<b>itscare1217</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 1:50pm<b>letmehavemytea</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 10:21am<b>MrGauss</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 5:02pm<b>thelifelesson</b> - the 01/18/2014 at 11:46pm<b>Janiney</b> - the 01/12/2014 at 8:35am<b>zeropointnine</b> - the 01/12/2014 at 1:36am<b>Terri_Dactal</b> - the 11/12/2013 at 8:23pm

Fucked!<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 12:52am

Sal_Plissken's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of Sal_Plissken's badges

Sal_Plissken's favorite FMLs

Today, once again, I explained that yes, I'm Russian. No, I'm not a communist. No, I don't pray to a picture of Putin riding a bear. And no, I don't have any vodka on me. FML

#21408243
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30154) - you deserved it (3002)

On 05/11/2015 at 2:59am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, our new boss banned coffee from the workplace, comparing caffeine to hard drugs. His comparison may not be wrong; after two hours, I couldn't take it any more, and in between fantasising about his cold-blooded murder, I begged to be allowed just one last cup. FML

#21403720
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29139) - you deserved it (4502)

On 05/03/2015 at 1:58am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Finland

Today, I asked my class to name some West African countries. Several of them thought Ebola was a country. I teach an AP history class. FML

#21400396
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33846) - you deserved it (3643)

On 04/27/2015 at 12:58am - work - by advanced history teacher (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my dad tricked the local biker gang into believing he's actually part of the Russian mob. FML

Today, for the first time in my life, a girl showed interest in me. She sent me a text message saying she wanted to come over and fuck my brains out. This would've made me the happiest guy alive, if only she weren't my extremely drunk sister. FML

#21391907
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33286) - you deserved it (2608)

On 04/11/2015 at 4:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I found out that my family and friends all laugh and compare me to Spongebob behind my back. Why? Because I'm 37 and still can't pass my driver's test. FML

#21391668
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28140) - you deserved it (16620)

On 04/11/2015 at 3:56am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I took my girlfriend to meet my parents. My dad thought it'd be hilarious to act surprised and ask me if I'd already dumped the girlfriend I introduced him to yesterday. She slapped me and stormed out of the house before my dad could tell her it was a joke. FML

#21378402
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32030) - you deserved it (2161)

On 03/20/2015 at 1:50pm - love - by not picking up (man) - Slovenia (Skofljica)

Today, I had to take a dump at work. I walked into the bathroom and opened a stall, only to find what I can only describe as a fecal crime scene. It was like a turd had exploded mid-air. It was so vile, my anxiety kicked in and I broke down into a sobbing panic attack. FML

#21378385
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25871) - you deserved it (3096)

On 03/20/2015 at 12:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, I told my mom I've been having sleep issues and asked if she could take me to the doctor. She decided I just need to read the Bible more. Needless to say, I still can't sleep. FML

#21377689
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27288) - you deserved it (2163)

On 03/19/2015 at 10:24am - health - by david99021 (man) - Turkey (Ankara)

Today, as I was riding my bike home from school, I saw a homeless man sitting on a bench. I was about to walk up to him and give him money, but before I could do anything my mother walked up and kissed him. My mom is dating this guy. FML

#21368890
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35244) - you deserved it (2787)

On 03/05/2015 at 8:38pm - love - by Not Homeless - United States (New Jersey)

Today, while cleaning my son's room, I found an envelope labelled "PRIVATE AND CONFIDENTIAL" under his bed. I opened it, only to find it was a glitter bomb. I couldn't get it all cleaned off myself before he got home. He just said "HAH! Serves you right!" and went to his room smirking. FML

#21365242
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18757) - you deserved it (55458)

On 02/28/2015 at 1:11pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I had a one night stand. After holding in my farts all night as is done, I decided enough was enough and to calmly let one slip out. One did not calmly slip out instead I shit myself in her bed. I was naked at the time so was unable to hide it. FML

#21346279
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29784) - you deserved it (13134)

On 01/29/2015 at 4:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, thinking he was being so hilarious, my friend slipped me enough laxatives to make a horse shit its intestines out. I haven't been able to move from the toilet for over an hour. FML

#21341346
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31936) - you deserved it (2637)

On 01/20/2015 at 11:29pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, my wife wanted me to take her to a new restaurant in town. When I looked it up and saw their prices, I almost had a heart attack. When I said it was too expensive, she snapped "Maybe you'd like to look up 'Lorena Bobbitt' next?!" We went to the restaurant. FML

#21338935
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28463) - you deserved it (5743)

On 01/17/2015 at 1:49pm - love - by wounded pride, intact cock (man) - United States



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