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SHAMUS_the_WITTY

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SHAMUS_the_WITTY

8Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Arc, France
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 2 August 1990 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 16412
  • Number of comments : 410
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

About SHAMUS_the_WITTY :
Shamus is the nickname I've had from my friends since I was 14 years old. I grew up in southern Alabama, and am attending college at LSU. IMHO, New Orleans is amazing

SHAMUS_the_WITTY's page activity

Visits<b>CandienInEurope</b> - yesterday at 9:07pm<b>slingerslasher</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 4:01am<b>dying_to_know</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 3:23am<b>Hop6e</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 1:00am<b>XPhoenixFire</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 3:26pm<b>yaboigabe</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 1:29pm<b>Vintage_Cola</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 11:53am<b>symfora</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 10:33am<b>chriss2015</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 10:09am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 9:40am<b>blaacbird</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 7:07am<b>Lukewarm_Grandma</b> - the 08/02/2015 at 1:17am<b>maydayyparade</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 12:24pm<b>theswanlake</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 8:55am<b>nerdtron430</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 12:20am<b>sethsmith11</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 4:24pm<b>redstone7693</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 12:50am<b>Welshite</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 9:29pm

Fucked!<b>dying_to_know</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 9:23am<b>Hop6e</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 7:00am<b>ScratchCatPower</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 12:34pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 3:28pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 02/01/2015 at 7:32am<b>WoldowJR</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 6:59pm<b>emmaaadotcom</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 11:06pm<b>mintyowlgirl</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 1:29am

SHAMUS_the_WITTY's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

See all of SHAMUS_the_WITTY's badges

SHAMUS_the_WITTY's favorite FMLs

Today, I announced my pregnancy to my husband. He responded with, "Well shit, when do these faucets turn on?" and started honking my boobs. FML

#21006112
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39907) - you deserved it (5512)

On 12/26/2013 at 12:27pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, we got our Christmas bonuses. Instead of money, the company decided to give us all lunch boxes with the company name on them. I went ahead and put my lunch in mine, then put it in the break-room refrigerator. Apparently so did all the other employees. Now I can't find mine. FML

#21004456
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38740) - you deserved it (8817)

On 12/25/2013 at 1:38am - work - by peevedemployee - United States

Today, I got a ransom note saying, "We have kidnapped your husband and won't release him unless you postpone the wedding." The wedding is tomorrow and it was in his handwriting. FML

#20998964
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52342) - you deserved it (4230)

On 12/20/2013 at 9:51am - misc - by oh why... (woman) - United States

Today, I had to pee during a supervised lockdown. I asked my teacher to take me since we couldn't be in the halls alone. Since class was going, she couldn't take me. Much to my dismay, she sent a school-wide email asking for someone to take me to pee. Six teachers took me, including my principal. FML

#20996748
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46111) - you deserved it (4914)

On 12/18/2013 at 4:56am - misc - by Anon - United States (California)

Today, I finally got the courage to tell the girl I like how I feel. She instantly burst out laughing and said "A crush? Dude, what are you, 12?! Hahaha!" FML

#20993484
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44939) - you deserved it (5967)

On 12/15/2013 at 2:16pm - love - by um...no? i don't think so anyway (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, at my job as a night janitor, at which I work alone, I saw an old man enter a bathroom. When I went to investigate, it was completely empty. I'm now scared to work. FML

#20987406
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56583) - you deserved it (3633)

On 12/10/2013 at 4:50am - work - by scared shitless (man) - United States (California)

Today, I took my cat to the vet's. When the vet took her temperature anally, I couldn't stop laughing. The vet had to ask me to leave the room. FML

Today, I was proud when I started a confrontation with my best friend's brother because he is a sexist pig who treats women like crap. Six hours later my pride was gone: I made him an after-sex sandwich. FML

#20975509
100 comments

Today, I arrived at work six minutes late due to heavily congested traffic. This is just two days after my boss put out a memo saying that anyone who's late to work from then until the new year will have their holiday bonus pay forfeited. FML

#20973886
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43775) - you deserved it (8069)

On 11/28/2013 at 5:03pm - work - by aaannnddd there goes my boner (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I had a nightmare in which I was haunted by the ghost of my foreskin. I then spent the whole day moping around, wondering what my life would've been like if my parents hadn't opted to slice it off. Will I see you in heaven, long-lost ghostly foreskin? FML

#20972170
248 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33493) - you deserved it (15691)

On 11/27/2013 at 3:44am - health - by MissYouPieceOfSkin (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was playing monopoly with my boyfriend and a few friends. After I bankrupted my boyfriend, he turned to me and said, "I fucked your best friend last night, so who really won?" I turned to the best friend in question, she looked at the board and said, "I'd like to buy a house please." FML

#20967834
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62379) - you deserved it (4530)

On 11/23/2013 at 11:11am - misc - by I hate that game - United Kingdom (Wigan)

Today, everything that was beautiful and pure in my life turned into a terrible, warped version of what it once was. Today, I lost all hope, and no longer believe that life, although sometimes shitty, is sweet and worth living. Today, I met my mother-in-law. FML

#20949272
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53710) - you deserved it (5600)

On 11/07/2013 at 5:21pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Derry)

Today, my 8-year-old came home from school crying. Apparently her teacher told the whole class to write about how they felt when they learned that Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy weren't real. FML

#20942077
286 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55073) - you deserved it (5491)

On 11/02/2013 at 12:19am - kids - by SantaClaus - United States (California)

Today, I got a new cell phone number and sent a text to my wife. Playing around, I said, "Hey sexy are you alone yet? I'm ready to come over." She responded with, "Hey, yeah he is at work - did you get a new number?" FML

#20941049
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (91572) - you deserved it (6647)

On 11/01/2013 at 3:01am - intimacy - by PapaW - United States (Utah)

Today, I heard crashing noises coming from my dining room. I got up to see what it was; my asshat cat was flinging himself at my chandelier. He'd figured out how to grab the ceiling fan from the other room, build momentum, and launch into my expensive chandelier. Hooray. FML

#20929956
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47983) - you deserved it (5087)

On 10/22/2013 at 5:12am - animals - by IamAflyingCat - United States



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