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  • Town/Country : Arc, France
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 2 August 1990 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 17752
  • Number of comments : 410
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

About SHAMUS_the_WITTY :
Shamus is the nickname I've had from my friends since I was 14 years old. I grew up in southern Alabama, and am attending college at LSU. IMHO, New Orleans is amazing

SHAMUS_the_WITTY's page activity

Visits<b>tgodluke</b> - the 11/04/2015 at 8:30pm<b>Mewling_Quim</b> - the 10/23/2015 at 2:47am<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 10/20/2015 at 8:15pm<b>xninix</b> - the 10/11/2015 at 11:06pm<b>CandienInEurope</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 9:07pm<b>slingerslasher</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 4:01am<b>dying_to_know</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 3:23am<b>Hop6e</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 1:00am<b>XPhoenixFire</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 3:26pm<b>yaboigabe</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 1:29pm<b>Vintage_Cola</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 11:53am<b>symfora</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 10:33am<b>chriss2015</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 10:09am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 9:40am<b>blaacbird</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 7:07am<b>Lukewarm_Grandma</b> - the 08/02/2015 at 1:17am<b>maydayyparade</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 12:24pm<b>theswanlake</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 8:55am

Fucked!<b>dying_to_know</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 9:23am<b>Hop6e</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 7:00am<b>ScratchCatPower</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 12:34pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 3:28pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 02/01/2015 at 7:32am<b>WoldowJR</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 6:59pm<b>emmaaadotcom</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 11:06pm<b>mintyowlgirl</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 1:29am

SHAMUS_the_WITTY's FML badges

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You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.


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You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

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SHAMUS_the_WITTY's favorite FMLs

Today, my 175-pound rottweiler I've raised since a puppy watched me get jumped and robbed of my phone and money in my yard. An hour later, he hopped the fence and chased the mail man down the street after he leaned on the fence for a second. FML


I agree, your life sucks (50204) - you deserved it (5076)

On 01/08/2014 at 6:02pm - animals - by Zach Got Robbed (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, like every other day for many years, I have a phobia of bananas. This evening, the phobia came to a head when I had a nightmare in which I was stabbed to death by a gang of walking bananas. FML


I agree, your life sucks (44487) - you deserved it (8312) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/03/2014 at 6:28pm - misc - by Elisa_LmR (woman) - France

Today, when I am asked to do something and I don't do it immediately, my mother threatens to "twerk" in front of my friends. FML


I agree, your life sucks (45852) - you deserved it (8858)

On 01/02/2014 at 9:52pm - misc - by FMLPLZ (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I watched my father attempt to light a cigar with the stove and end up burning off some hair and eyebrows. He tried to play it cool, said, "Haircuts are too expensive these days anyway." and walked out, his head smoking. This man is a college professor. FML

Today, I announced my pregnancy to my husband. He responded with, "Well shit, when do these faucets turn on?" and started honking my boobs. FML


I agree, your life sucks (40407) - you deserved it (5553)

On 12/26/2013 at 12:27pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, we got our Christmas bonuses. Instead of money, the company decided to give us all lunch boxes with the company name on them. I went ahead and put my lunch in mine, then put it in the break-room refrigerator. Apparently so did all the other employees. Now I can't find mine. FML


I agree, your life sucks (39199) - you deserved it (8894)

On 12/25/2013 at 1:38am - work - by peevedemployee - United States

Today, I got a ransom note saying, "We have kidnapped your husband and won't release him unless you postpone the wedding." The wedding is tomorrow and it was in his handwriting. FML


I agree, your life sucks (52835) - you deserved it (4271)

On 12/20/2013 at 9:51am - misc - by oh why... (woman) - United States

Today, I had to pee during a supervised lockdown. I asked my teacher to take me since we couldn't be in the halls alone. Since class was going, she couldn't take me. Much to my dismay, she sent a school-wide email asking for someone to take me to pee. Six teachers took me, including my principal. FML


I agree, your life sucks (47239) - you deserved it (5016)

On 12/18/2013 at 4:56am - misc - by Anon - United States (California)

Today, I finally got the courage to tell the girl I like how I feel. She instantly burst out laughing and said "A crush? Dude, what are you, 12?! Hahaha!" FML


I agree, your life sucks (45412) - you deserved it (6016)

On 12/15/2013 at 2:16pm - love - by i don't think so anyway (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, at my job as a night janitor, at which I work alone, I saw an old man enter a bathroom. When I went to investigate, it was completely empty. I'm now scared to work. FML


I agree, your life sucks (57078) - you deserved it (3663)

On 12/10/2013 at 4:50am - work - by scared shitless (man) - United States (California)

Today, I took my cat to the vet's. When the vet took her temperature anally, I couldn't stop laughing. The vet had to ask me to leave the room. FML

Today, I was proud when I started a confrontation with my best friend's brother because he is a sexist pig who treats women like crap. Six hours later my pride was gone: I made him an after-sex sandwich. FML


Today, I arrived at work six minutes late due to heavily congested traffic. This is just two days after my boss put out a memo saying that anyone who's late to work from then until the new year will have their holiday bonus pay forfeited. FML


I agree, your life sucks (44232) - you deserved it (8130)

On 11/28/2013 at 5:03pm - work - by aaannnddd there goes my boner (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I had a nightmare in which I was haunted by the ghost of my foreskin. I then spent the whole day moping around, wondering what my life would've been like if my parents hadn't opted to slice it off. Will I see you in heaven, long-lost ghostly foreskin? FML


I agree, your life sucks (33910) - you deserved it (15847)

On 11/27/2013 at 3:44am - health - by MissYouPieceOfSkin (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was playing monopoly with my boyfriend and a few friends. After I bankrupted my boyfriend, he turned to me and said, "I fucked your best friend last night, so who really won?" I turned to the best friend in question, she looked at the board and said, "I'd like to buy a house please." FML


I agree, your life sucks (63532) - you deserved it (4630)

On 11/23/2013 at 11:11am - misc - by I hate that game - United Kingdom (Wigan)

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  • Hi gang! It’s a day of national pride over near the FML offices. There's a time for everything, and even if the desire to piss about to release the tension is huge, we mustn’t forget that we can…

Friday 27 November 2015

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