About RodzillaX : I'm here to laugh at your misfortunes. Yes, you in the shirt. I'm laughing at you, and you can't do a thing about it. I like cats.
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RodzillaX's favorite FMLs
Today, while I was in the shower, I heard a door slam. Assuming it was my fiancé, I shouted "I love you!" I later opened the bathroom door to see my stereo and television missing. I'd said "I love you" to whoever robbed my apartment. FML
by ShowerGirl / 04/30/2013 at 3:54am / United States / Money
by Anonymous / 04/24/2013 at 6:29pm / United Kingdom (Gloucestershire) / Love
Today, my school took part in a standardized state test. After finishing, I decided to take a nap, only to be awoken by the test monitor, who wanted me to leave. Apparently, I was ferociously farting in my sleep and was disturbing the people still taking the test. FML
by Skyler / 04/24/2013 at 3:14pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I was hanging out with some friends, and I had to take a dump. After I was done, I realized there was no more toilet paper, so I asked my friends to get me some. They threw in duct tape, sandpaper, and saran wrap, and told me to make a decision. FML
by Anonymous / 04/22/2013 at 2:33pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anon / 04/22/2013 at 3:19am / Singapore / Miscellaneous
by wilks311 / 02/02/2013 at 9:12am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
Today, I desperately needed to pee, so I decided to confront my anxiety issues and use a public toilet. I opened the lid, only to see several huge, rancid floaters staring back at me. I had an attack, started sobbing, and pissed myself on the way home. Never again. FML
by VMV / 02/01/2013 at 6:53pm / Spain (Catalonia) / Miscellaneous
Today, as usual, my cat was sleeping on my stomach. I couldn't fall asleep so I delicately picked him up and put him down next to me. He got up, hopped back onto me, gave me a slap and then went back to sleep on my stomach. I didn't dare move all night. FML
Today, I came home to find my girlfriend crying. Concerned, I quickly asked her what was wrong. She told me tearfully that she couldn't understand why her pet lizards hadn’t grown into dinosaurs yet, and that pet store had cheated her. I’m still concerned now, but for entirely different reasons. FML
Today, as every day for the past few weeks, my husband won't have sex. His reason? We've decided to have a baby, and he reckons that the longer he waits, the more competition there will be between his sperm and thus the better the result will be. FML
by Karim / 12/12/2012 at 12:29am / France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur) / Love
Today, as I was waiting for my girlfriend in the street, I saw a woman who looked a lot like her. I ran towards her, my arms in the air ready to give her a hug, only to realise it wasn't her. I then had to pass the woman, my arms in the air, still running. FML
by minibuch1505 / 09/21/2012 at 7:31am / Miscellaneous
Today, I was out apartment hunting with my boyfriend. We visited a marvelous place that ticked all the boxes on our requirement checklist, but my boyfriend was unenthused. There was just one small detail that I hadn’t factored in: it's very badly located if ever zombies attack. FML
by TBTC / 08/31/2012 at 3:16am / France (Pays de la Loire) / Miscellaneous
by LOTRfail / 07/26/2012 at 10:13pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy
- Today, I was in a taxi in Mexico. The driver got fed up with the traffic and decided to cross the… Today, on the road in China, I committed a small offense. A cop saw me, stopped me and told me that… Today, I couldn't get into my car. I got mad at the lock, and my key broken inside it. It wasn't my…