Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

RockyLovesARacer

Offline (6 hours ago) | Search for a member

RockyLovesARacer

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Toronto, Canada
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 16 October 1989 (25 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2118
  • Number of comments : 38
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

RockyLovesARacer's page activity

Visits<b>bahamit</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 12:53pm<b>kathstew</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 9:47am<b>MidnightRain3</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 3:15am<b>knightofdarkness</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 10:32pm<b>seetei</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 1:37am<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 9:46am<b>MrsHaxxo</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 9:40am<b>chillandfun</b> - the 05/28/2015 at 1:12am<b>Allornone</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 11:18pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 11:08am<b>toasty_narwals</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 9:44am<b>FuckFace10</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 7:19pm<b>BlondePsycho</b> - the 04/05/2015 at 3:58pm<b>ma12r</b> - the 04/05/2015 at 1:13pm<b>Railworker12</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 9:01am<b>hasanjk</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 1:06am<b>Ingredients</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 8:36pm<b>PaigeCutright</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 4:25pm

Fucked!<b>flopstar</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 10:08pm

RockyLovesARacer's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

See all of RockyLovesARacer's badges

RockyLovesARacer's favorite FMLs

Today, I accidentally texted the girl I like, "Oh god, I just choked on a boner." I meant bone. FML

#21442630
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24148) - you deserved it (4288)

On 07/16/2015 at 3:22pm - misc - by Boneo and Juliet - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I went down a water slide. Halfway through, I got stuck behind some kids who were blocking the tube. Seconds later, a big-boned lady crashed into my back. Her solution to break the blockade was to start kicking my back repeatedly as hard as she could. The kids still wouldn't move. FML

#21441433
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27588) - you deserved it (1563)

On 07/14/2015 at 6:33am - misc - by ow my kidneys (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, my 3-year-old pooped his pants in a public bathroom. As I was squatting down, doing my best to clean poop off of his legs and the floor, a wasp flew up my pant leg. I was stung four times before I danced it out of my pants. FML

#21433955
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23940) - you deserved it (1476)

On 06/29/2015 at 5:52pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Mississippi)

Today, while watching a family movie, my mother made every effort to make sure I covered my eyes during a kissing scene. I guess it shouldn't be a surprise, since she still forces me to put my phone in her room every night as she makes me go to bed at 8:30 PM. FML

#21432771
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25941) - you deserved it (3269)

On 06/27/2015 at 11:01am - misc - by anonynous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was complimented on my improved performance over the last 3 months. My boss said he doesn't know what I've done to improve, but to keep it up. I'd only started looking for another job, and stopped giving a shit. FML

#21431603
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24480) - you deserved it (1955)

On 06/25/2015 at 3:06am - work - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I brought my best friend home and told my dad we were going to study together. He loudly replied "Woah!", stumbled around for a few seconds like he was drunk, then apologized and said the "sheer amount of gayness" between us had overloaded his gaydar. We're not gay, dammit! FML

#21429349
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25527) - you deserved it (2992)

On 06/21/2015 at 2:04am - misc - by notgay (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my girlfriend gave me my first ever blowjob and she surprised me by deciding to swallow. Or so I thought. When she came up to kiss me, she spat my man-milk into my mouth and almost pissed herself laughing when I freaked out and nearly threw up. FML

#21428553
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29782) - you deserved it (12280)

On 06/19/2015 at 12:17pm - intimacy - by shmarf (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, it's my birthday. I had asked my parents for a keyboard, and I was really excited to open the massive box they gave me. It was a computer keyboard. I've been playing piano for 11 years. FML

#21428456
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28195) - you deserved it (4032)

On 06/19/2015 at 4:37am - misc - by THANKS - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my 14 year old brother and 9 year old sister were fighting. My brother said "You suck!" to my sister, and she replied with "You swallow!" FML

Today, some guy I passed in the street was so high out of his mind, he beat the crap out of me, thinking I was a piñata. FML

#21416582
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28725) - you deserved it (2396)

On 05/27/2015 at 10:21am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Mexico

Today, some guy I passed in the street was so high out of his mind, he beat the crap out of me, thinking I was a piñata. FML

#21416582
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28725) - you deserved it (2396)

On 05/27/2015 at 10:21am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Mexico

Today, I sleep during the day because I work nights. My neighbors have a very loud wedding and reception in their backyard including a live mariachi band. FML

#21414664
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26082) - you deserved it (2992)

On 05/23/2015 at 10:38pm - misc - by Vlen (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I waited tables for the first time at my new restaurant job. I asked a group of older men what they would like. One replied, "A slice of that ass". I'm 19 and a guy. FML

#21413610
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31642) - you deserved it (2797)

On 05/21/2015 at 4:41pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I took my family to Disneyland. My husband had more fun than my five year old daughter. He was hitting on the princesses. FML

#21411433
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29000) - you deserved it (2668)

On 05/17/2015 at 12:08pm - love - by creepedoutmom (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my grandpa told me he was going to be eating out tonight, and I asked at which restaurant. He replied "Your gran's room." and winked. I didn't need that mental image, at all. FML

#21409445
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31168) - you deserved it (2907)

On 05/13/2015 at 12:00pm - misc - by -_- (woman) - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • Feeling shitty? Write to Auntie Bernie!
  • It's a new summer, so here's a new feature. OK, that doesn't mean much, but you've got to start somewhere. The idea came from the fact that we get sent a lot of FMLs that touch us, in our heart of…

Friday 24 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: