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Rilerz6996

Offline (the 08/19/2014 at 6:02pm) | Search for a member

Rilerz6996

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 780
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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Rilerz6996's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of Rilerz6996's badges

Rilerz6996's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up after a night out drinking on my sofa, with an electric dog collar around my neck and handcuffs on my wrists. The keys were on the other side of the invisible doggy fence. FML

#15154591
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13551) - you deserved it (35016)

On 02/28/2011 at 8:10pm - health - by stupiddrunk (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I woke up to a broken window and 3 guys sitting in my living room watching TV. FML

#13413623
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36724) - you deserved it (2820)

On 10/11/2010 at 11:06pm - misc - by anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, I saw a crash on the highway. The police weren't yet there, so I pulled over to help because I know CPR. No one needed CPR, but I had locked myself out of my car. My roadside assist won't come to highways, so I had to get towed away in front of everyone. FML

#13245639
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23499) - you deserved it (5858)

On 09/29/2010 at 3:08am - misc - by blonde (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I waked in on my boyfriend and his best friend playing "Dick Wars" while wearing glow in the dark condoms. FML

#9416886
396 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49239) - you deserved it (9637)

On 03/27/2010 at 4:26am - intimacy - by pumpkinlover89 - United States (California)

Today, I was at the Wild Animal Park. There were bees everywhere. One brave bee, thinking he was Mr. Macho, flew right down my tank top in between my boobs. I freaked the hell out and ended up screaming and pulling down my shirt to get the bee out. I flashed about 10 kids and their families. FML

Today, I allowed my five-year old daughter to paint my fingernails during a living-room "picnic" we were having. A while later I got called back in to work for an emergency meeting. When I arrived at the meeting I noticed my fingernails were still neon-green. I am a 40-year old man. FML

#2565972
287 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48751) - you deserved it (15843)

On 06/03/2009 at 1:40pm - kids - by psychortiz (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was taking a nap. Apparently, my two year old daughter decided to crawl on top of the covers on my bed because she was scared since there was a thunder storm. I thought she was one of our cats so I kicked her off. She hit the wall. FML

#2532710
1185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (88995) - you deserved it (234413)

On 06/02/2009 at 2:03pm - animals - by fmlfmlfml (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my dog started to hump my leg. He always does this and I heard that humping the dog back asserted dominance. Well, I decided to, and I dry humped him back. As I was doing this I said "How do you like that!" And then my mom walked in. FML

#2026481
440 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33803) - you deserved it (146969)

On 05/17/2009 at 7:40pm - animals - by sucks (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I found out that my husband named our daughter after his favorite porn star. FML

#1749459
248 comments

I agree, your life sucks (140372) - you deserved it (14208)

On 05/08/2009 at 3:39pm - misc - by Oblivious (woman) - Kuwait

Today, I went to a fast-food joint and ordered off the $1.00 menu to save money. Five hours later I go to the hospital with food-poisoning. After a whole day of not eating, crapping, puking, having tests, and a bunch of IV fluids, my $1.00 burger ended up costing me $2,000 in bills. Really. FML

#1547778
428 comments

I agree, your life sucks (167642) - you deserved it (25666)

On 05/02/2009 at 12:56am - health - by Sick (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I had an ultrasound in fear of testicular cancer. I apparently signed papers allowing an intern to do it for practice. She was in her early 20s and smoking hot so as she was rubbing jelly on my testes I got an erection. FML

#1525413
291 comments

I agree, your life sucks (74839) - you deserved it (25416)

On 05/01/2009 at 2:21pm - intimacy - by erectioninfection (man) - United States

Today, I was at work laminating a large photo. While I was doing this, I had a sudden itch on my nut sack. So I quickly scratched it away. When the customer came to pick up the print, I noticed that one of my pubic hairs had laminated itself on the cheek of the woman in the photograph. FML

#869023
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17238) - you deserved it (94053)

On 04/08/2009 at 10:48am - work - by StevieMe (man) - Canada (Ontario)



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