About ResoundingSpud : I hate everyone, go away.
ResoundingSpud's FML badges
I like your style
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You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
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ResoundingSpud's favorite FMLs
Today, I went to feed my neighbors' chickens while they were on vacation. I noticed the TV on inside, so I peeked in to see if the place was being messed with. Guess who found the neighbor home early, fully naked, and jerking off. FML
by Lebac / 04/14/2015 at 4:33am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy
by no, YOU raised him / 04/03/2015 at 5:15pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Kids
Today, three of my dipshit coworkers kept whining all day about Zayn Malik leaving One Direction, how devastating it is, and what it means for their future. As a pacifist, I've never had to struggle so hard to not beat the piss out of people and hurl their broken remains out a window. FML
by Anonymous / 03/25/2015 at 3:00pm / United States (New Jersey) / Work
Today, I heard what sounded like water against my window, and I couldn't believe it was raining in Southern California at this time of the year. I then turned to the window to see a hobo peeing on my window. FML
Today, my teacher took my test along with another student's and gave us both a zero. Why? Because we both have colds so when we breathe through our nose it makes a sniffle noise. She thought we were using a secret code to communicate by sniffling. FML
by Mr. Sniffles / 03/23/2015 at 11:43am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
by poop / 03/21/2015 at 12:47pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous
Today, my brother wore a T-shirt to my birthday party that said "I dig skinny chicks". I'm a recovering anorexic and told him that I didn't really like his shirt. His response? "Don't let the liberal media brainwash you into thinking it's OK to be fat." FML
by Idigrespectfulattire / 03/17/2015 at 8:18pm / Trinidad and Tobago (Port-of-Spain) / Miscellaneous
by sa la vash / 03/14/2015 at 4:22am / Netherlands / Intimacy
Today, I was walking my dog. Suddenly, my insane neighbor who loves dogs a bit too much comes over and asks to pet my dog. I say OK, thinking that if I watch her, she won't do anything. I turn around to make sure no cars are coming and when I turn back, she's trying to steal my dog. FML
by teecrafter2038 / 03/12/2015 at 10:07am / United States (New York) / Animals
Today, I went running. I live in a small town and people know me fairly well. It was dark when I went to avoid the heat. I was almost finished with my run when the cop comes up and asks me what I'm running from. Clearly being fat and out of shape is not a good enough alibi. FML
by Anonymous / 03/11/2015 at 9:50pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Health
Today, I finally accepted I need help with my anxiety issues. I started small and I joined a support forum and wrote a post. I was quickly called a troll by multiple users, accused of faking it, and told to "fuck off back to Tumblr" because they wouldn't believe my anxiety is really so serious. FML
by Anonymous / 03/11/2015 at 2:43pm / United States / Health
Today, I jokingly sent my girlfriend a link to an article about giving better head. She didn't think it was funny, and has since sent me numerous articles about the female orgasm, and I just got a link to the Wikipedia article about the clitoris. FML
by Anonymous / 03/10/2015 at 7:15pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by oh well / 03/10/2015 at 9:27am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I got to listen to my boss lecture me about professional dress and subtly insinuate that my being on the heavier side top-wise with all the men in the office could be a problem. I've worn turtle necks for the whole two months I've been working there. FML
by Anonymous / 03/09/2015 at 6:59pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Work
by Anonymous / 03/07/2015 at 2:05pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous