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RedX1000FML's favorite FMLs
by Ellie / 10/09/2013 at 7:15pm / United States (Kansas) / Work
by resurrected / 09/04/2013 at 11:59am / United Kingdom (West Sussex) / Work
Today, in a fit of paranoid hysteria, my mom threw out my phone, claiming the NSA can look through the camera to spy on me. I guess that's why you're still using your own phone to sext your latest boyfriend, eh mom? FML
by whoriblemomindeed / 06/20/2013 at 12:02pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by jku / 01/02/2012 at 8:18am / United States (Montana) / Miscellaneous
by ifailsobadly / 08/13/2011 at 4:22pm / United Kingdom (Worcestershire) / Miscellaneous
by ChubbyTubby / 01/17/2010 at 1:13pm / United States (Georgia) / Geek
Today, I took this gorgeous girl from work to eat at Olive Garden. I was trying to be romantic and had the waiter bring two glasses of wine. I guess she doesn't really drink wine, she covered her fettucini Alfredo in vomit. After dinner, she thanked me with a french kiss. FML
by Anonymous / 10/30/2009 at 2:02am / United States (California) / Love
Today, I was feeling really horny. I decided to send dirty texts to my girlfriend. I sent the first and she didn't reply, so I sent more and more and then I got one back saying 'Stay away from my little girl.' FML
by Oops54321 / 09/28/2009 at 3:12am / France (Midi-Pyrenees) / Intimacy
by fmysexlife / 07/27/2009 at 1:06am / United States (New Hampshire) / Intimacy
Today, I stepped outside to wait for a cute guy to arrive after arduously preparing for our first date. Just as he rounded the corner, I tripped over the last stair and landed headfirst into my mom's fresh pot of snapdragons. My mom uses compost and manure for her plants. FML
by flowerfail / 06/16/2009 at 5:13am / United States (Illinois) / Love
by SoClose / 02/03/2009 at 9:25am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
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