About Raicomm : Im so pathetic I can't even get my FMLs posted.
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Raicomm's favorite FMLs
by Great / 04/08/2014 at 9:42pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by AsianSweets / 03/24/2014 at 11:32am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
by ashamed father / 03/09/2014 at 6:32pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids
by Estee1024 / 01/24/2014 at 12:28am / United States (California) / Kids
Today, I asked my boss for a raise, explaining that another shop offered me a job at a higher rate, but I would stay if he would offer me the same. Instead, he fired me then called the other shop and said I was fired for failing a drug test. FML
by nowork / 08/27/2013 at 11:21pm / United States (New York) / Work
Today, at soccer tryouts, the coach made us run the entire practice. I ran the whole two hours ahead of everyone. When the tryout ended, I vomited due to dehydration. I didn't make the team. The coach's reasoning: "Only the weak throw up". FML
by Anonymous / 08/27/2013 at 2:39pm / United States (New York) / Health
by 12345678910 / 08/18/2013 at 2:22pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, my daughter, who was born in late 2000, mentioned how amazing it is that she'll be alive during the year 3000. I asked her exactly how old she thinks she'll be by then. She said, "Thirty, duh." I've screwed up as a parent, so very badly. FML
by Anonymous / 08/06/2013 at 11:19am / United States (Arkansas) / Kids
Today, my girlfriend dumped me for no real reason via text message. A few hours later, she updated her relationship status on Facebook to "in a relationship." Her new "boyfriend"? Her cat. A mutual friend commented, "Well, he's better than that idiot you had before." FML
by tkghan / 08/02/2013 at 10:53am / United States (Massachusetts) / Love
Today, while leaving McDonald's, I threw a fry out the window to a flock of seagulls. I watched in the rear-view mirror as it landed in the opposite lane and about 60 winged rats descended upon the street, causing a truck to veer off the road and crash. FML
by John / 07/09/2013 at 10:48pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Your ass... Grab it... / 07/04/2013 at 6:30pm / United States (Texas) / Health
Today, I saw a little girl digging in the gravel inside the fireworks tent I work in. After she and her family left, I went and used my foot to smooth out the mound she'd made. In doing so, I discovered that she wasn't digging, she was burying. She'd pooped. FML
by brokeandhungry / 07/04/2013 at 1:18am / United States / Kids
by idk ask freud / 07/04/2013 at 12:11am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 07/03/2013 at 5:01pm / Canada (Alberta) / Work
Today, I ran the mile in gym class. I was the second to last person to finish, and I was left panting and feeling faint. When the teacher found out I hadn't come in dead last, he accused me of skipping a lap and is now making me rerun the entire thing. FML
by Anonymous / 06/12/2013 at 10:56am / United States / Miscellaneous
- Today, I walked into the restroom at work, only to find my boss stroking and playing with himself.… Today, my man and I were having sex on edge of bed. We were using chocolate spread and I was riding… Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. Right as I was really getting into it, he pauses, frowns,…