About Pussycat86 : My whole existence is FML!
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Pussycat86's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 11/22/2014 at 1:18pm / Ireland (Kilkenny) / Intimacy
Today, my boss expects me to conduct a meeting with a client, give him all the info he needs, and manage his campaign. This is because he fired the "expensive" marketing director and wants me, the intern, to continue his work. FML
by givemestrength / 08/14/2014 at 6:31am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Work
by Anonymous / 05/31/2014 at 3:24am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Jarool / 05/12/2014 at 3:41pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous
Today, I farted so loudly I not only woke myself up, but my husband as well. He mistook my gas for someone trying to break in and insisted on checking the whole house. I was too embarrassed to tell him the truth. FML
by gassymomma / 04/28/2014 at 12:58pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
by Not-pregnant / 04/20/2014 at 1:21pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
by Motha / 04/09/2014 at 1:17am / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous
Today, I met a really nice girl at a club, and we went back to my place. I was finally going to lose my virginity, but just as she started kissing me, I panicked and ended up fainting. When I came to, I was still clothed, and she was long gone. FML
by ohai ur hawt, wanna fuzzzZzZZzzZzz / 04/04/2014 at 7:20pm / Mexico (Distrito Federal) / Love
Today, it's the last day of my sign language class. At the end of the class, my teacher surprised us by speaking for the first time, also surprising everyone that she wasn't actually deaf. It wouldn't have been so bad had I not just given someone an answer to the test, thinking she couldn't hear me. FML
by booboo300 / 04/03/2014 at 6:16pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, my wife got her period. Every single time, she ends up asking me to go buy her some midol after a few days of trying to tough it out, so I decided to buy her some ahead of time. She reacted by yelling at me for treating her like a child and implying that she couldn't go buy it herself. FML
by unappreciated husband / 03/28/2014 at 5:43pm / United States (Washington) / Love
Today, I took my 12 year-old to the orthodontist. While I was talking to the dentist about what was needing to be done, my daughter listened. With a straight face, the dentist joked, "Yeah, we're going to need to rip off her entire jaw." My daughter won't leave her room anymore. FML
by Anonymous / 03/27/2014 at 8:09pm / United States (Ohio) / Kids
Today, a tiny worm was wriggling across the screen of my Mac laptop. I tried to wipe it away with my thumb, but it just kept crawling. Turns out the worm lives *inside* my screen, beneath the glass. FML
by Anonymous / 03/21/2014 at 1:14am / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous
by KEA_08 / 03/20/2014 at 1:13pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
by Good choice cat / 02/24/2014 at 2:05pm / United States (California) / Animals
by vey / 02/08/2014 at 5:14pm / China (Beijing) / Miscellaneous
- Today, my mother got incredibly drunk. She told me that only "sluts and whores" shave their pubes.… Today, my boyfriend and I went out on his boat. We got in the water and started to have sex when a… Today, I walked in on my dad completely naked. When I expressed my displeasure, he told me to knock…
- Today, I realized I despise most of my friends and will do anything to avoid them. Including hiding… Today, my brother tried to convince me the Earth is flat and that stars are people that died. FML. Today, my six year old son was yelling to me from outside the house. Frustrated because I could not…