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PureTime

Offline (the 01/14/2015 at 7:22pm) | Search for a member

PureTime

0Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 1085
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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PureTime's page activity

Visits<b>sadbubbles</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 5:39pm

PureTime's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

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You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

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PureTime's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend slept with my sister. "Accidentally", apparently. FML

#21322801
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37416) - you deserved it (2941)

On 12/23/2014 at 4:48pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, a customer came in with a laptop smashed beyond repair. She asked if we could recover her files, but thanks to my idiot boss' new store policy I had to ask her a bunch of questions, including if she had tried "turning it on and off". She stared at me, speechless, like I was a complete moron. FML

#21321539
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34565) - you deserved it (3746)

On 12/21/2014 at 2:08pm - work - by anonix (man) - Canada

Today, I went on a date with a girl who had to cut our date short so she could go on another one. FML

#21313753
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34451) - you deserved it (3278)

On 12/08/2014 at 12:58pm - love - by Anonomous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I decided to check out a dating site, when I stumbled across my ex wife's profile. She'd had it for four out of the five years of our marriage. And no, it didn't rate us as a good match. FML

#21305183
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30928) - you deserved it (3253)

On 11/24/2014 at 1:47pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I helped a very large elderly man, who thanked me and tried to hand me a dollar bill. I kindly told him, "We are not allowed to accept tips from customers." His reply was, "You're going to take this fucking money," and shoved it in my pocket. I'm now being written up for it. FML

#21304848
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32763) - you deserved it (2644)

On 11/23/2014 at 10:48pm - work - by justinmdent - United States (Missouri)

Today, I had a dream that I kicked the moon like a soccer ball. It started swearing in my boyfriend's voice. That part wasn't a dream. FML

#21300835
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28802) - you deserved it (3451)

On 11/17/2014 at 5:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, as I was waiting in line at the check out, some guy came up behind me, plucked a hair out of my head, and ran off with it. FML

#21295452
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31467) - you deserved it (2551)

On 11/09/2014 at 1:49pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was at my friend's Bar Mitzvah. After he finished his long-winded speech, I sarcastically did the mockingjay sign from the Hunger Games. It took a couple of seconds before I realized how that looked, and a couple more for me to be shouted down and kicked out. FML

#21294686
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17066) - you deserved it (30792)

On 11/08/2014 at 12:24pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I finally found out why my husband is always so eager and happy to buy me whatever I am craving during my pregnancy. It's because it gives him an excuse to meet up with his mistress and have a quickie. FML

#21294259
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53963) - you deserved it (2970)

On 11/07/2014 at 6:59pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I took a army-mandated personality evaluation test. The results said I had a high chance of schizophrenia and multiple personality syndrome. Part of me says that the test is probably spot-on, the other part says it has to be a mistake. Apparently this is another sign of schizophrenia. FML

Today, my ex sent me a pack of beer to screw with me. I'm still going to AA, and I thought I was almost over it. Five bottles later, I realized I'm not. We didn't break up over my drinking, either; it was because after just 2 weeks of dating, she threatened to kill herself if I didn't marry her. FML

#21292603
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34165) - you deserved it (3323)

On 11/05/2014 at 8:57am - health - by AAnonymous (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blowjob. I was laying in between his legs because it's just more comfortable. I looked down, and he had pieces of toilet paper sticking out of his butt cheeks. FML

#21291810
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44363) - you deserved it (6606)

On 11/04/2014 at 7:03am - intimacy - by anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I lost my virginity. In the middle of it, he just gave up and said he wasn't in the mood anymore. Then I had to listen about his past failed relationships for over an hour. FML

#21291250
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40936) - you deserved it (4629)

On 11/03/2014 at 1:56pm - intimacy - by EliseV (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my daughter mentioned that she didn't need to work because she could convert a dollar to 13 Mexican pesos and convert it back into "13 USD", over and over again. She's 17. FML

#21290410
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35642) - you deserved it (4727)

On 11/02/2014 at 10:23am - kids - by wow - United States (Florida)

Today, I discovered that if you heckle a mime, it's possible that the mime will actually kick your ass. FML

#21283193
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15521) - you deserved it (34705)

On 10/22/2014 at 4:24pm - misc - by mr_cheese (man) - United States (Washington)



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