About PsychoticAsylum : I'm a pretty good person to talk to. I'm a gender neutral person, which means I do not go by she/he, him/her, or male/female. I would prefer to be addressed as they/them/their. I'm a fan of heavy metal and it's many sub-genres but I listen to other music too. I like playing Nintendo video games and reading manga/comic books. My favorite being Kabuki: Circle of Blood. I love to draw, I drew my profile picture.
PsychoticAsylum's FML badges
Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja
You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
PsychoticAsylum's favorite FMLs
Today, I had to remove a glass bottle, complete with an ineffective pullstring, from a patient's rectum. He claimed that he'd accidentally sat on it, and later threatened to sue me for every penny if I breathed a word of it to anyone. Oops, looks like I just did. FML
by DocKreso / 06/28/2013 at 5:59pm / Croatia (Splitsko-Dalmatinska) / Work
by Anonymous / 06/28/2013 at 2:07pm / Egypt (Al Qahirah) / Miscellaneous
by unknown relationship / 06/28/2013 at 1:23am / United States (Illinois) / Work
Today, after spending four hours cooking food for a special family dinner, I went to take a shower before they arrived. I came back out less than twenty minutes later to find most of the food gone, and a very guilty-looking puppy. FML
by Auroraen / 06/27/2013 at 9:23pm / United States (Illinois) / Animals
Today, I was accused of shooting drugs at work. I was only feeding a baby bird that was tucked into my arm using a medicine syringe. I've been smuggling it to work because it has to eat every 2 hours or it will starve. Now everyone there thinks I'm a hardcore dope fiend. FML
by Gribby / 06/27/2013 at 7:56pm / United States (Missouri) / Animals
by smh / 06/27/2013 at 7:37pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous
by keiran123 / 06/27/2013 at 7:15pm / United States (Louisiana) / Work
by Guntherdog / 06/27/2013 at 11:17am / United States / Miscellaneous
by EpicJman2828 / 06/27/2013 at 12:27am / United States / Animals
by theunluckylifeofme / 06/26/2013 at 4:33pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, another "gentleman" called and asked for my "services". This is happening a lot lately, because apparently I have the old number of a prostitute. I told him I'm not who he's looking for, to which he replied that I sound like a "sexy lady" and that he wanted to have some fun. FML
by Anonymous / 06/26/2013 at 1:05pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 06/26/2013 at 2:57am / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 06/25/2013 at 1:16pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous
Today, after going out to dinner with my girlfriend, we went back to my place and things started getting hot. I went in the bathroom and put on a green condom. She wouldn't have sex with me because it looked "like a cucumber" and "cucumbers are nasty." FML
by dan / 06/25/2013 at 12:22am / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy
by o_O / 06/23/2013 at 1:26pm / United States (Kentucky) / Miscellaneous
- Today, I just found out I am pregnant by my abusive drug addict Ex who I broke up with 2months ago.… Today, is a month into my new job. Three employees have already been fired, my boss has interviewed… Today, all of my friends are moving into their university dormitory. I'm stuck at home on bedrest…