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Prolux

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Prolux
  • Town/Country : Alberta, Canada
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 8 November 1998 (15 years)
  • Number of visits : 1139
  • Number of comments : 103
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Prolux : "Censorship is telling a man he can't have a steak just because a baby can't chew it." - Mark Twain

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Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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Prolux's favorite FMLs

Today, while at a funeral for a distant family member, I was giving my condolences to the family. When one of them asked how I was doing, I replied with, "I'm still alive!", which is one of my standard responses due to being a cashier and being asked that question a hundred times a day. FML

Today, after working my shift at McDonalds, I went to clock in at my dispatch job. During a 911 call, I blurted, "Would you like to try the McRib while it's back?" FML

#21023934
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44399) - you deserved it (8166)

On 01/10/2014 at 9:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I rushed to a dentist's appointment. Once in the chair, I apologized for not having had the time to brush my teeth beforehand. He responded with, "Ah that's alright, I just took a piss and forgot to wash my hands." FML

#20937985
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43183) - you deserved it (11315)

On 10/29/2013 at 2:57pm - health - by Anonymous - Zimbabwe

Today, my best friend went in for her scheduled mammogram, and I sent her a text saying, "How're your boobies?" It was only after I sent it that I realized I'd sent it to my history professor. FML

#20930198
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35432) - you deserved it (9973)

On 10/22/2013 at 12:47pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I heard crashing noises coming from my dining room. I got up to see what it was; my asshat cat was flinging himself at my chandelier. He'd figured out how to grab the ceiling fan from the other room, build momentum, and launch into my expensive chandelier. Hooray. FML

#20929956
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43539) - you deserved it (4600)

On 10/22/2013 at 5:12am - animals - by IamAflyingCat - United States

Today, I found out that my phone fits perfectly through the slot between the elevator and the floor. FML

#20921212
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45381) - you deserved it (4196)

On 10/15/2013 at 2:37am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my son's lemonade stand was robbed by a senior citizen. FML

#20908703
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44825) - you deserved it (2778)

On 10/05/2013 at 6:25pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, a customer was paying for his food. As he placed the money in my hand, he said, "Careful, those coins are sticky." I asked why. He replied, "You know, male stuff." FML

Today, I started my new job at a restaurant I really like. As I waited on my first customer, I suggested that he try the apple pie, because it's my favourite. He looked up at me and said, "Yeah? Figures! Lay off 'em, porky!" FML

#20891546
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40400) - you deserved it (4965)

On 09/22/2013 at 2:00pm - work - by -_- (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my grandmother opened the bathroom door to find me eating a spoonful of Nutella while on the toilet. She is convinced that I was eating my own shit and will not stop telling everybody. They believe her. FML

#20882660
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25667) - you deserved it (37578)

On 09/15/2013 at 5:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, after having recently told my 4-year-old daughter that she won't grow big and tall if she doesn't eat her veggies, she decided to pass this wisdom on to a midget that we passed in the store. FML

#20877041
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54515) - you deserved it (8924)

On 09/11/2013 at 2:10pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I was asked to leave a church service for laughing at the kids trying to sing. FML

#20876850
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20571) - you deserved it (70150)

On 09/11/2013 at 9:29am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Today, I was asked to leave a church service for laughing at the kids trying to sing. FML

#20876850
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20571) - you deserved it (70150)

On 09/11/2013 at 9:29am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Today, my husband thought it would be acceptable to watch Breaking Bad on Netflix with my 4-year-old in the room. What happened to be the only line he picked up? "Well heil Hitler, bitch!" I found out from his preschool teacher. FML

#20865525
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39528) - you deserved it (4318)

On 09/03/2013 at 12:13am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, we went boating with friends. For some reason the bottom of our tube deflated, causing me to be bounced roughly up and down on the water. As a result, I had the most intense orgasm of my entire life, while sitting 2 inches away from my dad's friend. He definitely noticed. FML

#20862305
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51687) - you deserved it (5344)

On 08/31/2013 at 9:21pm - intimacy - by SplishSplash (woman) - United States



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