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ProMaxwell's FML badges
You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
I like your style
You've liked someone. How cute!
ProMaxwell's favorite FMLs
Today, like every other day for many years, I have a phobia of bananas. This evening, the phobia came to a head when I had a nightmare in which I was stabbed to death by a gang of walking bananas. FML
by Elisa_LmR / 01/03/2014 at 6:28pm / France / Miscellaneous
by NoNotCats =^._.^= / 09/03/2013 at 4:17am / United States (Arizona) / Health
by VictoriaLeavitt / 06/24/2013 at 8:35pm / United States (Nevada) / Kids
Today, my very conservative mom met my girlfriend, who recently shaved her head in support of her best friend, who has cancer. My girlfriend looks beautiful and feminine even with her still very short hair. My mom, however, keeps insisting that I'm dating "a confused transgender". FML
by Anonymous / 02/23/2013 at 8:42pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
Today, as an introduction to the history of China, I asked my APA World History class to write a 500 word essay on a historical Chinese person. Out of a class of 18, five of them were about Mulan. FML
by desperate / 10/05/2012 at 5:47am / Malta / Work
by blakeintheoffice / 08/08/2012 at 9:53am / United States / Work
by mypoolisstilldirty / 02/16/2012 at 11:26am / Australia / Miscellaneous
by MikeNick / 12/17/2011 at 2:59am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/08/2011 at 9:04am / United States (Texas) / Love
Today, I emailed my potential boss a copy of my résumé. However, I didn't realize until too late that it was my fake resume, created for an English class project. Some of my former jobs included being a certified gangster, as well as the former president of Canada. FML
by Almostfunny / 03/16/2011 at 9:01am / United States (Massachusetts) / Work
Today, I celebrated my birthday. When asked last week, I said I wanted a keyboard. When I opened the present, my parents went into hysterics. It was an electronic Dora the Explorer keyboard. I've been studying music composition and theory for six years. They think my major's a joke. FML
by Anonymous / 11/24/2010 at 9:49pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous
by liz / 07/16/2010 at 3:45pm / United States (California) / Love
by Anonymous / 01/08/2010 at 11:32am / United States (New York) / Love
Today, my boyfriend of 7 years broke up with me in a text message. Then I found out from a mutual friend that he "came out" and told everyone at our school that he is gay. He has known he was gay for years and he was just using me as a cover up. What a great way to start my senior year. FML
by amanda_ae_erin / 11/09/2009 at 11:02pm / United States (Georgia) / Love
Today, my car was in the shop so I borrowed my wife's VW Beetle convertible. It's really embarrassing because it's a girlie car and it's full of little stuffed animals. At a stop light a man asked me if I'd like to borrow one of his testicles because "every man should have at least one." FML
by NoBalls / 06/11/2009 at 8:23pm / United States (Indiana) / Transportation
- Today, my neighbor turned down his loud music that he's been playing for months, only to turn on a… Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It was the first time in four months since our baby was… Today, I met my recently divorced mother's new boyfriend. He is missing teeth and has long hair and…
- Today, on the road in China, I committed a small offense. A cop saw me, stopped me and told me that… Today, it’s exam day in Sweden. Yesterday, I prepared three fountain pens and six cartridges. The… Today, I’m on vacation in Peru in the Amazonian forest. I woke up in the middle of the night to the…