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Polynomial

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Polynomial

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Monday 5 May 1980 (35 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2935
  • Number of comments : 225
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 38 posted

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Polynomial's page activity

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Polynomial's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

See all of Polynomial's badges

Polynomial's favorite FMLs

Today, the midwest blizzard hit my town, burying the roads in snow. All the local stores are closed. I'm not only currently on my period, but I'm out of pads and toilet paper. FML

#14827819
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43347) - you deserved it (9675)

On 02/03/2011 at 3:59pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I got home from my holidays to find my flatmate has moved his girlfriend in without asking me. Not only does she walk around naked, she has also redecorated the rooms. FML

#14752507
249 comments

Today, my girlfriend and I were about to have sex for the first time. We are both virgins. After we kissed and I took down my pants, she screamed and said "That THING is going to break me." We never did it. FML

#14604817
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44221) - you deserved it (6356)

On 01/16/2011 at 8:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my husband of 19 years took our children out for dinner, told them he's gay, then sent them home to tell me for him. FML

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. He's been calling his penis "fun-sized" for a while now, but I didn't know he meant it really was the size of a fun-size candy bar. I'm pretty sure I'm still technically a virgin. FML

#14475422
309 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50951) - you deserved it (8660)

On 01/05/2011 at 3:49pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my dad told me he had been seeing someone for a while and has decided to marry her. When I met her, her son looked familiar. I lost my virginity to him. FML

#14460417
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44718) - you deserved it (5376)

On 01/04/2011 at 5:56am - intimacy - by LoveMyNewBro -

Today, my best friend lost her virginity in the backseat of a car. I was sitting in the front. FML

Today, a guy at my work asked if I could fix his computer in his cubicle. The first thing I see on the screen when he logs me onto it is an anime porn game with tentacles. My boss walks by, stares at me and then laughs uncontrollably. FML

#14033332
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30357) - you deserved it (3320)

On 11/30/2010 at 3:48am - intimacy - by Jack -

Today, whilst driving to the store, an idiot driver found it to be okay to drive ridiculously fast in below freezing temperatures on the ice and snow. As he passed my car, I angrily gave him the finger. And then I realized I was wearing mittens. FML

Today, my doctor told me to buy some KY Jelly and a dildo to help "loosen me up" so sex isn't so painful. I haven't been able to have sex for 6 months because it hurts so badly, and now my doctor has basically told me to go fuck myself. FML

#13937569
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35618) - you deserved it (7900)

On 11/22/2010 at 2:36pm - intimacy - by painfulintercourse - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my mother was over visiting. My three year old ran out of my room chasing the cat with his toy. He smacked the cat with it, the cat scratched him, he dropped it and ran away. I was busy with the baby so I asked my mom to take the toy away. She walked back holding my pink dildo. FML

#13876258
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24688) - you deserved it (10517)

On 11/17/2010 at 12:13pm - intimacy - by bottomdrawerraider (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, my mother was over visiting. My three year old ran out of my room chasing the cat with his toy. He smacked the cat with it, the cat scratched him, he dropped it and ran away. I was busy with the baby so I asked my mom to take the toy away. She walked back holding my pink dildo. FML

#13876258
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24688) - you deserved it (10517)

On 11/17/2010 at 12:13pm - intimacy - by bottomdrawerraider (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I found out that my best friend lost her virginity to my father. Her excuse? She was drunk. His excuse? "She's hot." FML

#13642352
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53744) - you deserved it (4010)

On 10/29/2010 at 9:21pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I found out that my parents like rough sex. I found the whip and handcuffs. FML

#13372336
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28035) - you deserved it (5086)

On 10/08/2010 at 11:29pm - intimacy - by mster233 (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my family and I attended a pool party. I never learned to swim, so I didn't bring a suit. When someone asked why I wasn't in the pool, my sister replied in a loud voice, "She's on her period and didn't want the pool to get dirty!" Thanks. FML

#12963410
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32700) - you deserved it (4345)

On 09/08/2010 at 2:09pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Greece (Attiki)



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