Polynomial

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Offline (the 09/20/2016 at 7:26pm)

Polynomial

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Monday 5 May 1980 (36 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5600
  • Number of comments : 315
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 40 posted

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Polynomial's page activity

Visits<b>COL_Obvious</b> - the 07/14/2016 at 11:04pm<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 07/09/2016 at 12:38pm<b>ExtremeEncounter</b> - the 05/19/2016 at 8:00pm<b>anahii1028</b> - the 04/28/2016 at 6:18pm<b>Lukerocks01</b> - the 03/16/2016 at 1:59am<b>HeavyWeaponsGuy</b> - the 02/24/2016 at 12:51am<b>EcchiShojo</b> - the 02/23/2016 at 6:43pm<b>agostina_mc</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 11:47pm<b>EvilLittleGirl</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 5:43pm<b>LyonDetreny</b> - the 01/08/2016 at 5:36am<b>21PGreenDay</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 9:35am<b>Gracemonique3</b> - the 12/12/2015 at 9:26am<b>Kitsi</b> - the 12/08/2015 at 4:43pm<b>tipuda</b> - the 12/08/2015 at 1:41pm<b>Anonymous66608</b> - the 12/08/2015 at 8:21am<b>kukumber</b> - the 12/06/2015 at 1:49pm<b>Fuaaad1994</b> - the 12/03/2015 at 3:29pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 12/03/2015 at 2:38pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 12/03/2015 at 8:38pm<b>imslappy</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 2:38pm<b>Wutdafuqq</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 3:01pm<b>Eliseopwns</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 7:44pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 2:58am

Polynomial's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of Polynomial's badges

Polynomial's favorite FMLs

Today, I was out with my brother and his group of very cute friends at a Cheesecake Factory. When the server came to take our orders, she asked me what kind of sauce I liked. Like a complete fuckwit, I blurted, "I like creamy white stuff." The guy across from me choked on his water. FML

by Bex98 / 01/11/2016 at 3:17am / United States (California) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was standing in line at the checkout, and my children were arguing with each other. The guy in front of me sighed loudly and told me over his shoulder: "There're these things called condoms, you know." FML

by Anonymous / 12/31/2015 at 5:33pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Kids

Today at work, a woman decided to use the changing room as a public toilet, to wipe the urine with the clothes she tried on, then leave the mess along with her soiled underwear and a used maxi pad for me to clean up. FML

by peachass / 12/28/2015 at 11:59pm / Australia (Victoria) / Work

Today, I opened my Christmas presents with my husband. One of the things he got me was a ball gag. "Yeah," he said with a grin, "That one's more for me but I didn't wanna buy myself headphones." Cue our son asking me what it was. FML

by Anonymous / 12/24/2015 at 6:47pm / Australia (South Australia) / Love

Today, I came home early to surprise my boyfriend. I walked into our bedroom to find him in dressed completely in my clothes, and in makeup. It took me a moment to realize it was him and not a female intruder. FML

by ConfusedGirl / 12/15/2015 at 8:03am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my wife knelt down in front me to give me a blowjob. As she took my underwear off a moth flew out of them. I've got no idea how it got there but I was cock-blocked by a moth. FML

by Moth_Balled / 12/14/2015 at 11:50pm / Australia / Intimacy

Today, I found out my girlfriend is a full-on, wants-to-be-banged-by-a-horse furry. FML

by Anonymous / 12/13/2015 at 6:47am / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy

Today, I was so inexplicably horny that I had to shuffle awkwardly and use my bag to hide the wetness of my pants as I left work for the day. FML

by Hormones apparently / 12/07/2015 at 9:32pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, I got the most action I've had in months when a stranger fondled my thigh on the subway. It was a blind man, searching for empty seats. FML

by SadAndAlone / 12/03/2015 at 11:41am / Sweden (Stockholms Lan) / Transportation

Today, I gave my boyfriend a blowjob for the first time. He came. A lot. I doubt I'll remember it as anything other than, "The day I found out what sneezing semen feels like." FML

by snortingspunk / 12/03/2015 at 7:52am / South Africa / Intimacy

Today, I completed my two-month internship, where I have been working as hard as I could with the hope of being hired. My boss couldn't remember my name, and declined to be a reference. FML

by Anonymous / 12/03/2015 at 4:47am / United States (Oregon) / Work

Today, while at a fastfood restaurant, I wanted to wash my hands. The restrooms were locked, so a cashier got the key and opened the mens restroom. This would have been fine if I wasn't a girl. FML

by turtles_yup / 12/03/2015 at 12:50am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realised there's a reason that no one talks to the weird guy from choir practice. I was nice to him a couple weeks ago and now he won't stop following me around the school and watching my group at lunch from behind a pole. FML

Today, my girlfriend and I were sending dirty messages to each other. We were getting really into it until she replied to one of my messages with, "Oooooh yeah." I read it in the Kool-Aid man's voice and couldn't stop laughing. Mood killed. FML

by Stuby14 / 11/23/2015 at 9:31am / United States (South Dakota) / Intimacy

Today, I've spent nearly three weeks indulging my boyfriend's weird fetish, where he wears a hockey mask and I call him Jason. He just confessed it isn't really a fetish for him and that was just fucking with me. He's already told all his friends. I'm humiliated. FML

by Anonymous / 11/21/2015 at 7:44am / United Kingdom (Cardiff) / Intimacy