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Polynomial

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Polynomial

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Monday 5 May 1980 (35 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3155
  • Number of comments : 252
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 38 posted

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Polynomial's page activity

Visits<b>ChloeRattlehead</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 12:30am<b>kikikiwi14</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 10:28am<b>THEGREATKEHOLIO</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 6:50am<b>Cynt3r</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 3:45am<b>melons</b> - the 05/31/2015 at 7:59pm<b>hasooon</b> - the 05/31/2015 at 7:05pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 05/30/2015 at 8:35am<b>danielpreaches</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 3:15pm<b>Jiratias</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 11:57am<b>danceinconverse</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 9:54am<b>KatieKoala</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 9:32am<b>magikarpsmurfs</b> - the 05/26/2015 at 1:11am<b>wondercat40</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 10:27pm<b>BananaCoconutty</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 8:22pm<b>Raelthelamb</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 1:47pm<b>imslappy</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 8:37am<b>Kitty_Kat44</b> - the 04/27/2015 at 3:32pm<b>BBeffedmylife</b> - the 04/27/2015 at 3:06pm

Fucked!<b>imslappy</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 2:38pm<b>Wutdafuqq</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 3:01pm<b>Eliseopwns</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 7:44pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 2:58am

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Polynomial's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend went down on me for the first time. When I didn't get off right away, he asked what he was doing wrong. I told him he was doing fine, but instead of focusing only on my vagina, he might want to pay attention to my clitoris as well. His response? "What's a clitoris?" FML

#20809292
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64429) - you deserved it (9517)

On 07/29/2013 at 3:54am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was buying condoms but was a little embarrassed so I went to the self-check. I scanned the condoms, then a magazine and tried to put the condoms under the magazines to hide them. The store guy saw me, thought I was shoplifting and I was kicked out of the store. FML

#20801510
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39310) - you deserved it (14406)

On 07/24/2013 at 4:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was at the store, when I saw my boyfriend in line in front of me. I looked to see what he was purchasing; it was a pack of condoms. When I questioned him, he said that, "They're for us, babe!" We already have an unopened pack at home, and it's my time of the month. FML

#20799401
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59672) - you deserved it (5776)

On 07/23/2013 at 1:18pm - intimacy - by MenstruallyFrustrated - United States (Arizona)

Today, my girlfriend was sitting on my lap at a birthday party. She thought it would be funny to fart. I came instantly. FML

#20785133
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59842) - you deserved it (21086)

On 07/15/2013 at 9:42pm - intimacy - by needsnewshorts (man) - United States (California)

Today, working my job, I had to explain to a kid that Pokemon is owned by Nintendo and they don't make it for the Xbox. Upset by this, he took hold of my leg and started biting. I'm also suspended, because his mother complained when I kicked him off me. FML

#20771337
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49483) - you deserved it (3275)

On 07/08/2013 at 10:08pm - work - by Garchomp (man) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I got home from work early and discovered why my 17-year-old daughter's sprained elbow isn't getting any better after weeks of treatment. She can't stop giving handjobs. FML

#20764944
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69053) - you deserved it (8115)

On 07/05/2013 at 10:26am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I woke up from an extremely intense and pleasurable wet dream. This wouldn't have been bad, had it not been about Velveeta cheese. FML

#20762710
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47263) - you deserved it (9354)

On 07/04/2013 at 12:11am - intimacy - by idk ask freud - United States (Oregon)

Today, my mom stole the condoms out of my room and gave them to my little brother because I "won't be needing them anytime soon". FML

#20759724
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42954) - you deserved it (4351)

On 07/02/2013 at 12:17pm - misc - by dry spell (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my mom signed me up for a swimming class to show my sister there's nothing to be afraid of. Considering I'm 17, I assumed I'd be in an advanced class. Instead, I get to spend summer blowing bubbles in the shallow end with four-year-olds as my little sister cheers me on from the steps. FML

#20758869
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38920) - you deserved it (3287)

On 07/01/2013 at 10:37pm - misc - by AwkwardPotato - United States (California)

Today, after going out to dinner with my girlfriend, we went back to my place and things started getting hot. I went in the bathroom and put on a green condom. She wouldn't have sex with me because it looked "like a cucumber" and "cucumbers are nasty." FML

#20745688
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50528) - you deserved it (13884)

On 06/25/2013 at 12:22am - intimacy - by dan (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my mom left for a bachelorette party. She forgot a gift, so she called me and made me go into her closet, pick out a sex toy from the "box of gag gifts", and bring it to her. Should I pick anal beads or a cock ring? FML

#20744678
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54855) - you deserved it (4480)

On 06/24/2013 at 2:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my grandma's new dildo arrived in the mail. We buried her yesterday. FML

#20731352
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69354) - you deserved it (3981)

On 06/17/2013 at 12:43pm - intimacy - by hinting (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, it was my wedding. Every good wedding has slutty wedding sex, and I thought it would be over after my cousin and his girlfriend were caught in the parking lot. I was wrong, the sluttiest wedding sex goes to my drunk husband and sister in the coat room. FML

#20684997
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (78598) - you deserved it (4863)

On 05/25/2013 at 2:55am - love - by lizzie - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I finally convinced my mom to read Fight Club. As English isn't her first language, she occasionally asked me to translate some of the words. Her latest question: "What's a dildo?" FML

#20657087
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28516) - you deserved it (38156)

On 05/11/2013 at 8:07pm - misc - by joeidk (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I finally convinced my mom to read Fight Club. As English isn't her first language, she occasionally asked me to translate some of the words. Her latest question: "What's a dildo?" FML

#20657087
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28516) - you deserved it (38156)

On 05/11/2013 at 8:07pm - misc - by joeidk (man) - United States (New York)



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