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Polynomial

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Polynomial

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Monday 5 May 1980 (35 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3504
  • Number of comments : 267
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 38 posted

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Polynomial's page activity

Visits<b>Xsweglord420x</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 5:53pm<b>llamingo</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 2:06pm<b>LittleBastard</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 12:10am<b>katachristic</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 11:03pm<b>dan199914</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 1:14am<b>love_struck97</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 7:25pm<b>Jatin_fmylife</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 7:38am<b>amadeclton</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 6:11pm<b>tylair</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 11:28am<b>madi113</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 12:08am<b>ChloeRattlehead</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 12:30am<b>kikikiwi14</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 10:28am<b>THEGREATKEHOLIO</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 6:50am<b>Cynt3r</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 3:45am<b>melons</b> - the 05/31/2015 at 7:59pm<b>hasooon</b> - the 05/31/2015 at 7:05pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 05/30/2015 at 8:35am<b>danielpreaches</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 3:15pm

Fucked!<b>imslappy</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 2:38pm<b>Wutdafuqq</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 3:01pm<b>Eliseopwns</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 7:44pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 2:58am

Polynomial's FML badges

Inception

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Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

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Polynomial's favorite FMLs

Today, while lifeguarding over children at work, I started thinking about my girlfriend and got a hard on. Before I realized it, I saved a kid and then hopped out of the pool next to a 5 year old in front of my managers and a little over 50 patrons with a raging boner. My HR meeting is tomorrow. FML

#21437372
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26124) - you deserved it (6651)

On 07/06/2015 at 1:28pm - intimacy - by notacreep - United States (California)

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. All the magic vanished when I kept queefing every time he thrust into me. We made it about 10 seconds before he broke down into hysterical laughter and lost his boner. FML

#21436148
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29348) - you deserved it (4287)

On 07/04/2015 at 1:02am - intimacy - by alison (woman) - United States

Today, I had to profusely apologize to a woman after my six year old son decided to crawl between her legs at the supermarket, then look up her skirt and loudly ask why she didn't have any panties on. FML

#21435950
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26515) - you deserved it (3248)

On 07/03/2015 at 4:51pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, another idiot was admitted to my hospital with a foreign object up his ass. Yet again, the excuse went along the lines of "I tripped and fell on it." Please, someone tell me how you can accidentally trip anus-first onto the end of a cucumber, which just so happens to have a condom on it. FML

#21432533
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31785) - you deserved it (2304)

On 06/26/2015 at 9:21pm - work - by Idiot says "HIPAA violation" (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I heard my sister screaming from the basement, "Don't you hit me, you asshole!" Knowing her boyfriend was over, I ran downstairs with my baseball bat, ready to smash the fucker hitting my sister. Turns out they were just playing Mario Kart and he rammed her off the edge of a bridge. FML

#21428714
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26820) - you deserved it (3705)

On 06/19/2015 at 6:21pm - misc - by baberuth - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, my housemate got back at me for asking for her share of a bill by losing her virginity to the guy I like, very loudly. FML

#21423445
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26474) - you deserved it (2022)

On 06/09/2015 at 4:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Ireland

Today, I saw a real, erect penis for the first time. My brother's, while he was jerking off. He doesn't know I saw, because he was holding a pair of panties over his face with his other hand. I'm trying like hell to act like I'm not mentally scarred. FML

#21411971
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32475) - you deserved it (2989)

On 05/18/2015 at 12:58pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, I had to play the hot and cold game with my boyfriend until he found my clitoris. FML

#21405064
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34678) - you deserved it (4526)

On 05/05/2015 at 11:13am - intimacy - by baby_trex_arms - United States (California)

Today, I saw one one of my cat's hairs on my sweatpants and wanted to remove it. It wasn't a cat hair, but a pubic hair that has found its way through my panties and sweatpants while being still attached to me. FML

Today, I jokingly sent my girlfriend a link to an article about giving better head. She didn't think it was funny, and has since sent me numerous articles about the female orgasm, and I just got a link to the Wikipedia article about the clitoris. FML

#21372045
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (369) - you deserved it (48830)

On 03/10/2015 at 7:15pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, at a music festival, some douche unzipped the back of my skirt, exposing my Ninja Turtle undies to everyone before running off. FML

#21369215
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32153) - you deserved it (4870)

On 03/06/2015 at 9:03am - misc - by no touching - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, after a 7 year dry spell, I finally got laid. The downside? It was in my dreams and involved a character from My Little Pony forcing itself on me. Now I hate that fucking stupid show more than ever. FML

#21365913
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33975) - you deserved it (7746)

On 03/01/2015 at 2:24pm - intimacy - by love and tolerape, apparently (man) - India (Jharkhand)

Today, I was checking the family's computer history, and found that "Shrek Porn" had been searched multiple times. FML

#21365639
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30724) - you deserved it (3338)

On 03/01/2015 at 1:05am - misc - by mszoe - United States (California)

Today, I had a talk with my daughter about how I hope her first boyfriend is a special one because 'spending the night' with a boy is a big deal. She replied with a giggle, "Mom, I lost my virginity in a parking lot three years ago!" FML

#21362728
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37152) - you deserved it (8188)

On 02/24/2015 at 5:25pm - intimacy - by Like mother like daughter (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my daughter got her first period. Nobody was home but my husband. He didn't know what to do, except give her a sponge to put in her underwear. FML

#21356191
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36390) - you deserved it (3465)

On 02/14/2015 at 7:34pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)



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