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Polynomial

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Polynomial

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Monday 5 May 1980 (35 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3353
  • Number of comments : 262
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 38 posted

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Polynomial's page activity

Visits<b>LittleBastard</b> - yesterday at 12:10am<b>katachristic</b> - yesterday at 11:03pm<b>dan199914</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 1:14am<b>love_struck97</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 7:25pm<b>Jatin_fmylife</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 7:38am<b>amadeclton</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 6:11pm<b>tylair</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 11:28am<b>madi113</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 12:08am<b>ChloeRattlehead</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 12:30am<b>kikikiwi14</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 10:28am<b>THEGREATKEHOLIO</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 6:50am<b>Cynt3r</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 3:45am<b>melons</b> - the 05/31/2015 at 7:59pm<b>hasooon</b> - the 05/31/2015 at 7:05pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 05/30/2015 at 8:35am<b>danielpreaches</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 3:15pm<b>Jiratias</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 11:57am<b>danceinconverse</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 9:54am

Fucked!<b>imslappy</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 2:38pm<b>Wutdafuqq</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 3:01pm<b>Eliseopwns</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 7:44pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 2:58am

Polynomial's FML badges

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of Polynomial's badges

Polynomial's favorite FMLs

Today, I was doing laundry while my boyfriend was sitting at the table playing on his phone. I glanced over and caught him watching my ass as I put clothes in the dryer. Trying to be sexy, I looked at him as I slowly bent over to put more clothes in. Instead, I hit my head hard on the dryer door. FML

#21449270
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15348) - you deserved it (4283)

On 07/29/2015 at 10:34pm - intimacy - by RuasaLove - United States (New Jersey)

Today, a revolving door got the better of me. I made it into the crowded lobby, unlike my skirt. Bad day to wear a thong. FML

#21448563
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23046) - you deserved it (2823)

On 07/28/2015 at 1:18pm - misc - by Oopsie - United States (Vermont)

Today, I had to imagine myself savagely beating my cat to death, just to stop myself from getting a boner while a girl laid her head in my lap. FML

#21446710
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26426) - you deserved it (4594)

On 07/24/2015 at 8:12pm - intimacy - by strangely - United States (California)

Today, about 30 seconds into my first blowjob, my girlfriend threatened to cut my balls off if I didn't "just fucking cum already". FML

#21446517
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23867) - you deserved it (2184)

On 07/24/2015 at 12:44pm - intimacy - by fuck (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I received a text with my last name spelled wrong. A short conversation revealed he got my number from me, through Tinder. I don't have an account, but he insisted he knew that I like it 'hard and rough'. He knew my first name. I still don't know how he got my phone number or name. FML

#21444252
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24232) - you deserved it (1680)

On 07/19/2015 at 11:00pm - intimacy - by creepedout (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went downstairs early in the morning to watch a movie. As I walked into the living room and reached for the light switch, I heard my dad say "Knew you'd change your mind. Get them panties off." followed by the sound of a zipper being undone. I've never been so mortified in my life. FML

#21442030
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33041) - you deserved it (2320)

On 07/15/2015 at 12:29pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while lifeguarding over children at work, I started thinking about my girlfriend and got a hard on. Before I realized it, I saved a kid and then hopped out of the pool next to a 5 year old in front of my managers and a little over 50 patrons with a raging boner. My HR meeting is tomorrow. FML

#21437372
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25850) - you deserved it (6616)

On 07/06/2015 at 1:28pm - intimacy - by notacreep - United States (California)

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. All the magic vanished when I kept queefing every time he thrust into me. We made it about 10 seconds before he broke down into hysterical laughter and lost his boner. FML

#21436148
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27970) - you deserved it (3713)

On 07/04/2015 at 1:02am - intimacy - by alison (woman) - United States

Today, I had to profusely apologize to a woman after my six year old son decided to crawl between her legs at the supermarket, then look up her skirt and loudly ask why she didn't have any panties on. FML

#21435950
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26443) - you deserved it (3245)

On 07/03/2015 at 4:51pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, another idiot was admitted to my hospital with a foreign object up his ass. Yet again, the excuse went along the lines of "I tripped and fell on it." Please, someone tell me how you can accidentally trip anus-first onto the end of a cucumber, which just so happens to have a condom on it. FML

#21432533
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31317) - you deserved it (2151)

On 06/26/2015 at 9:21pm - work - by Idiot says "HIPAA violation" (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I heard my sister screaming from the basement, "Don't you hit me, you asshole!" Knowing her boyfriend was over, I ran downstairs with my baseball bat, ready to smash the fucker hitting my sister. Turns out they were just playing Mario Kart and he rammed her off the edge of a bridge. FML

#21428714
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26782) - you deserved it (3699)

On 06/19/2015 at 6:21pm - misc - by baberuth - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I saw a real, erect penis for the first time. My brother's, while he was jerking off. He doesn't know I saw, because he was holding a pair of panties over his face with his other hand. I'm trying like hell to act like I'm not mentally scarred. FML

#21411971
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32395) - you deserved it (2981)

On 05/18/2015 at 12:58pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, I had to play the hot and cold game with my boyfriend until he found my clitoris. FML

#21405064
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34555) - you deserved it (4520)

On 05/05/2015 at 11:13am - intimacy - by baby_trex_arms - United States (California)

Today, I saw one one of my cat's hairs on my sweatpants and wanted to remove it. It wasn't a cat hair, but a pubic hair that has found its way through my panties and sweatpants while being still attached to me. FML

Today, I jokingly sent my girlfriend a link to an article about giving better head. She didn't think it was funny, and has since sent me numerous articles about the female orgasm, and I just got a link to the Wikipedia article about the clitoris. FML

#21372045
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (347) - you deserved it (48745)

On 03/10/2015 at 7:15pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)



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