About PoLLynomchik : Whenever I feel like a loser, just a few fmls are usually enough to realise my day wasn't really that shitty=)
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PoLLynomchik's favorite FMLs
by frediqqq / 02/25/2015 at 11:21pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was sitting on a bench at the local park, eating a banana. A guy old enough to be my grandfather walked by, turned to look at me, then said "Young man, I wish I were that banana." He walked away, and I almost blacked out choking on it in shock. FML
by Operation Yewtree here I come / 09/26/2014 at 4:40pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/17/2014 at 4:07pm / United States / Love
by Mia / 08/20/2014 at 2:07am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy
by FANZZY / 08/18/2014 at 12:29pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by give me an F / 01/05/2014 at 11:16am / United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire) / Love
Today, I watched my father attempt to light a cigar with the stove and end up burning off some hair and eyebrows. He tried to play it cool, said, "Haircuts are too expensive these days anyway." and walked out, his head smoking. This man is a college professor. FML
by Purplexus / 01/02/2014 at 9:13am / Turkey (Ankara) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was proud when I started a confrontation with my best friend's brother because he is a sexist pig who treats women like crap. Six hours later my pride was gone: I made him an after-sex sandwich. FML
by Ashamed_Sister / 11/30/2013 at 2:35am / Namibia (Windhoek) / Love
by hoolagirl4422 / 09/20/2013 at 7:23am / Hong Kong / Love
Today, I saw an elderly gentleman in the street wearing a shirt with a big QR code on it. Amused, I used an app on my phone to decode it. It gave me a shortened web address, which I followed, only to be faced with a picture of the same gentleman naked, grinning, and giving a thumbs up. FML
by Anonymous / 09/15/2013 at 3:53pm / Romania (Bucuresti) / Intimacy
by Anon / 04/22/2013 at 3:19am / Singapore / Miscellaneous
by dancekat / 04/08/2013 at 5:17am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy
Today, while going down on my girlfriend, I finally managed to give her an orgasm. During that orgasm, she tore out a clump of my hair, causing me to scream in pain. She scowled and said, "Ah shut it, ya little bitch." FML
by dating walter white's gf apparently / 04/06/2013 at 3:13pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy
Today, I was eating out with a group of friends and my boyfriend. During the meal, I accidentally took a sip from my male friend's glass. My boyfriend pointed and said, "Babe, you took his drink." My friend responded by putting his arm round me and saying, "Whatever, I took her virginity." FML
by everyoneheard / 03/28/2013 at 11:11am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Intimacy
by Candycane88 / 03/26/2013 at 10:12am / United States (California) / Love
- 1Today, I took a test. I got up to turn it in, and accidentally bumped into another student. We both… 2Today, I tried to fire the worst worker I've ever had over the phone because he never shows up for… 3Today, a week after dropping my car off for the third time in a month at the dealership because of…