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PhoenixMartinez

Offline (the 04/22/2015 at 5:58am) | Search for a member

PhoenixMartinez

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1220
  • Number of comments : 57
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 38 posted

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PhoenixMartinez's page activity

Visits<b>colvindj</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 11:09pm<b>feven</b> - the 02/01/2015 at 3:23pm<b>destructor2014</b> - the 02/01/2015 at 12:43am<b>TPH1979</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 8:36am<b>triplebeerox</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 5:33am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 7:51am<b>Wolfparable</b> - the 01/16/2015 at 7:33pm<b>sam882</b> - the 01/06/2015 at 8:10pm<b>clairesucks</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 2:07am<b>missa8604</b> - the 01/04/2015 at 8:48pm<b>klauerbrianna</b> - the 12/05/2014 at 6:48pm<b>jmcr</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 10:34am<b>boobear19883</b> - the 09/09/2014 at 8:35pm<b>sapnagirl</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 11:18pm<b>kaceylee</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 9:08am<b>MrsWinchester</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 1:12am<b>DomiLove</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 8:12pm<b>hurtfeet</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 4:34pm

Fucked!<b>klauerbrianna</b> - the 12/06/2014 at 12:48am<b>Metz_yolo</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 8:21am

PhoenixMartinez's FML badges

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of PhoenixMartinez's badges

PhoenixMartinez's favorite FMLs

Today, a parent of one of the students I teach called me to complain that I was teaching her child "lies" and "fairytales". I was teaching them about the Holocaust. FML

#21390720
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33308) - you deserved it (1810)

On 04/09/2015 at 3:38pm - work - by PrettySureItsReal - United States (Missouri)

Today, I got a bikini as a birthday present. I pulled the bikini bottom out of the box first, only to find a pubic hair stuck to the hygienic liner. FML

#21390617
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31371) - you deserved it (2022)

On 04/09/2015 at 12:00pm - misc - by gross - United States (Michigan)

Today, at the restaurant I work at, my own mom refused to give a tip and complained to my boss. FML

#21390474
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31690) - you deserved it (3071)

On 04/09/2015 at 3:55am - work - by jackzz - Vietnam (Dac Lac)

Today, I overheard a large group of my friends and acquaintances making spontaneous plans to go see a movie that afternoon. I was the only person not invited. Normally I would have believed their excuse that they thought I was "sick at home", except I was sitting a few feet away the entire time. FML

#21390441
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27976) - you deserved it (2356)

On 04/09/2015 at 2:25am - misc - by ifeelsoloved (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was paired up with my long-term crush for a project. She introduced herself to me and asked if I was new this year. We've gone to the same school since kindergarten. FML

#21390271
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32834) - you deserved it (3008)

On 04/08/2015 at 9:58pm - love - by Heart-Broken - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, after locking myself out of my house, I let myself into my car to wait on someone with a spare key. It took me 15 minutes to realise the house and car key share the same ring. FML

#21390076
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19084) - you deserved it (15433)

On 04/08/2015 at 3:36pm - misc - by losing the plot (man) - United Kingdom (Bristol, City of)

Today, I walked in on my 17-year-old brother jerking it to a scene from the movie Frozen. Brain bleach, please. FML

#21390007
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35575) - you deserved it (3659)

On 04/08/2015 at 1:19pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, at a mind-numbingly boring support session, everyone was talking about their hardships. One guy was talking about losing his leg in a car accident. I was half-asleep and asked without thinking, "Did you ever find it?" I almost shat my pants at the roomful of death glares that followed. FML

#21389976
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17305) - you deserved it (32323)

On 04/08/2015 at 12:08pm - misc - by S to the HIT (man) - United States (California)

Today, after pulling an all-nighter studying for an exam, I caught the bus to college. On the way there, the bus decided to make sweet love to a taxi, creating a pile-up and a traffic jam. I didn't make it to the exam in time. FML

#21389932
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28584) - you deserved it (1919)

On 04/08/2015 at 10:43am - misc - by rUs7up1d (man) - Guatemala (Guatemala)

Today, I found out just how much my dog likes ice-cream when she tackled a little girl at a park for hers. FML

Today, I did the smart thing and bought an umbrella before walking to work. My efforts proved useless when a truck ran through a huge puddle and drenched me from head to toe. My underwear was still wet 4 hours later. FML

#21389865
50 comments

Today, I got disappointed when I realized that I had to share a bed with my husband because we had company over. FML

#21389862
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22576) - you deserved it (16364)

On 04/08/2015 at 6:52am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I had to get stitches in my vagina due to an unfortunate mishap while climbing a fence. FML

#21389569
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32393) - you deserved it (4733)

On 04/07/2015 at 8:47pm - misc - by burnswhenipee - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was talking with my mother. As we went to say goodbye, she said "I love you". Out of habit of saying I love you to my girlfriend, I said, "Love you too babe". FML



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