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PenguinBitch

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PenguinBitch

66Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 1 November 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 14079
  • Number of comments : 1108
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About PenguinBitch : Things I enjoy...
-I enjoy paddle boarding every Sunday
-I volunteer at an animal shelter during my free time
-I also partake in fencing and do my share with the community Jazz Club. The enormous lie I'm telling you still doesn't compare to the size of your mom's ass.

PenguinBitch's page activity

Visits<b>Musicforlife29</b> - 2 hours ago<b>Broskenman20</b> - 15 hours ago<b>Quasars</b> - 15 hours ago<b>stereomommy</b> - 24 hours ago<b>buckstop1</b> - 24 hours ago<b>TheBitchSlayer</b> - 24 hours ago<b>chaoss10</b> - yesterday at 1:42pm<b>Wolfipoo</b> - yesterday at 12:34pm<b>DaEpicTaco</b> - yesterday at 9:56am<b>kittykat1501</b> - yesterday at 1:22am<b>EmmaMK</b> - yesterday at 11:20pm<b>Jax_Ashnarr</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 12:29pm<b>heyitscoley</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 10:22am<b>Sidbore</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 8:46am<b>addisonrose12</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 12:26am<b>raul1394</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 10:48pm<b>ronnie7pt</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 10:31pm<b>BigL99</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 8:50pm

Fucked!<b>EmmaMK</b> - yesterday at 5:21am<b>CrAzYELF4</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 2:12am<b>RektRules</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 1:04am<b>sp00derman</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 12:41am<b>Juicenub</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 1:32pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 12:31am<b>Wolfipoo</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 6:51pm<b>Zigstyle308</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 8:14pm<b>starlandmarie</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 2:50am<b>seetei</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 7:14am<b>the_aspect</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 4:48pm<b>whitnayfortooh</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 5:41am<b>nhbasskid13</b> - the 04/30/2015 at 1:01am<b>interesting33</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 12:08pm<b>sarcasm_insanity</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 5:17am<b>MaltWarrior</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 6:47am<b>Drarry</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 4:17am<b>LoveNnyl</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 3:25am

PenguinBitch's FML badges

Gold Rush

How about we run you a bath and give you a new car as well?

Picture this FML

You have left your mark on an illustrated FML’s presentation blog article.

Colonel_Whiskers

You liked our secret mascot. Well done, Sherlock!

See all of PenguinBitch's badges

PenguinBitch's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my girlfriend why she never lets me in her house. She stared blankly and said, "What is inside is not for thine eyes." I told her best friend about this creepiness later on. She sighed and said, "T'was not for mine eyes either. I didst fail to listen." I feel like I'm losing my mind here. FML

#19772012
284 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26984) - you deserved it (3534)

On 06/11/2012 at 5:45pm - love - by amidreaming?? (man) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I was jumped and savagely beaten to the ground by a group of six-year-olds wearing Disney princess masks. FML

#19641324
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23167) - you deserved it (6079)

On 05/18/2012 at 10:13am - kids - by 23yearoldtoddler - United States

Today, I went to the hair salon. When I got home, my three-year-old daughter told me I looked like Dora the Explorer. FML

#19635267
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20366) - you deserved it (5198)

On 05/17/2012 at 12:35am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my dad made me deliver a welcoming cake to our new neighbors. While I was making small-talk, I saw him climb over their backyard fence. A minute later, he climbed back over, with a plastic deck-chair in hand. I feel like an accessory to the pettiest theft in history. FML

#19205333
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23415) - you deserved it (1915)

On 03/02/2012 at 9:24pm - misc - by wtf dad (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, while in Walmart, I noticed an old man who had been following me for about five minutes. I politely pulled over with my cart and smiled at him so he could pass. He then said with a creepy smile, "So it's your turn to stare at my butt now?" It's the most attention I've gotten in weeks. FML

#19117584
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28850) - you deserved it (2845)

On 02/19/2012 at 8:14pm - love - by Nicole - United States (California)

Today, I was using a restroom when I heard someone sneeze. I said, "Bless you." It happened again about three times, so I repeated myself each time. I then noticed it was an automatic air freshener. FML

#18981474
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15951) - you deserved it (22857)

On 02/03/2012 at 12:25am - misc - by coleslaw (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while helping my father build a shelf, I suggested that we should probably use the instruction manual. He suggested I should probably shut the fuck up and do it his way. FML

#18738481
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27142) - you deserved it (14038)

On 01/07/2012 at 7:12pm - misc - by Jman6295 (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I discovered that for the last six months my mother has been leaving my TV on FOX while I sleep, in the hope that my subconscious will absorb it and turn me into "a morally-upright human being". FML

#18529063
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27688) - you deserved it (4581)

On 12/16/2011 at 5:02pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went out with a guy I really liked for the first time. He tried to hold my hands, only to be stopped by my mum, jumping out from nowhere saying "Oh no you don't!" before slapping him. This isn't the first time this has happened. FML

#17827987
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40873) - you deserved it (3273)

On 09/25/2011 at 6:26am - love - by Anonymous - Singapore

Today, I'm getting kicked out of my flat because my drunk friends stole a pony and left it tied outside. FML

#17669700
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26150) - you deserved it (3010)

On 09/05/2011 at 11:03am - misc - by thefrightening1 (woman) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, my mom was convinced that the lawn gnomes we bought from Wal-Mart were secretly conspiring to kill us. FML

#17487537
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30794) - you deserved it (3607)

On 08/16/2011 at 2:52am - misc - by Stevie - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while using the restroom at McDonald's, a hand reached under my stall and took the remaining toilet paper. FML

#17307885
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36862) - you deserved it (3708)

On 07/30/2011 at 10:07am - misc - by ewww - United States (New Jersey)

Today, at a family reunion, my dad announced to everyone that I'd finally started my menstrual cycle. My grandmother started sobbing hysterically. FML

#17092331
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40300) - you deserved it (2776)

On 07/13/2011 at 9:31am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I realized that my pubes are longer than my penis itself. FML

#16181302
346 comments

I agree, your life sucks (77347) - you deserved it (23744)

On 05/15/2011 at 12:41am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I got back from vacation and walked in on my boyfriend and my brother in my bed. FML

#15617038
354 comments

I agree, your life sucks (112717) - you deserved it (7953)

On 04/03/2011 at 4:06am - intimacy - by Now Single - Reserved



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