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PenguinBitch

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PenguinBitch

56Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 1 November 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 13216
  • Number of comments : 1088
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About PenguinBitch : Congratulations. You have now reached the end of FML. Go any deeper and you will reach the void. Goodbye. ✌🏼️

PenguinBitch's page activity

Visits<b>yasss</b> - 5 hours ago<b>annie_potter_</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 6:28am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 7:58am<b>ginnylin</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 12:58pm<b>jadenjacksonm</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 8:15am<b>cutiepie292929</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 3:58am<b>the_aspect</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 10:48am<b>BIGGItheTexan</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 6:16am<b>brutally</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 3:13am<b>wheresmymary</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 12:32am<b>Raleaf</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 11:38pm<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 11:06pm<b>HumanitysFinest</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 1:15pm<b>lucythomson</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 1:05pm<b>addisonrose12</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 12:22am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 9:55am<b>CultureChic</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 12:19am<b>whitnayfortooh</b> - the 04/30/2015 at 11:41pm

Fucked!<b>the_aspect</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 4:48pm<b>whitnayfortooh</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 5:41am<b>nhbasskid13</b> - the 04/30/2015 at 1:01am<b>interesting33</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 12:08pm<b>sarcasm_insanity</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 5:17am<b>MaltWarrior</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 6:47am<b>Drarry</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 4:17am<b>LoveNnyl</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 3:25am<b>allykaymorris</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 2:06am<b>skye147</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 12:03am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 12:57am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 8:43pm<b>mwali02</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 9:53pm<b>clairesucks</b> - the 03/25/2015 at 7:32am<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 2:21pm<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 12:44am<b>MehNameIsJuan</b> - the 03/03/2015 at 4:58pm<b>ClockworkPoleaxe</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 7:14am

PenguinBitch's FML badges

Gold Rush

How about we run you a bath and give you a new car as well?

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Colonel_Whiskers

You liked our secret mascot. Well done, Sherlock!

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PenguinBitch's favorite FMLs

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She said, "Sure, but not yet." As we've been together for five years, I was a bit confused, but she cleared that up with, "Not until your dad has died, I don't want him to ruin my wedding with a bad toast." FML

#21405053
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34260) - you deserved it (2781)

On 05/05/2015 at 10:44am - love - by inheritance (man) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, I was supposed to light candles at my aunt's wedding. I accidentally lit the groom on fire. FML

#21402824
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29757) - you deserved it (5549)

On 05/01/2015 at 9:41am - misc - by why? - United States

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years broke up with me, all because he thought I was a communist, a sinner, and a terrorist, simply because I think the gay rights are OK, because I agree with some feminists, and because I got blonde highlights in my hair. FML

#21402099
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31689) - you deserved it (5422)

On 04/29/2015 at 11:31pm - love - by Confusedblonde - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend for the first time. I moved my leg to wrap it around him and accidentally hit his penis. Without thinking, I said, "Sorry little guy!" FML

#21402047
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31165) - you deserved it (9706)

On 04/29/2015 at 10:25pm - intimacy - by MiniJeans - United States (Florida)

Today, my mom announced my pregnancy to the entire family via Facebook with the post, "Just went from a MILF to a GILF in one moment of unprotected sex." FML

#21401833
100 comments

Today, my mom told me that if I wanted to commit suicide, I should make it seem like a car accident, and not do it in the house, because she would be too embarrassed if people thought she was a bad parent. FML

#21401085
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36250) - you deserved it (2625)

On 04/28/2015 at 9:26am - misc - by WasNotAdopted (man) - United States (California)

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend because I felt unappreciated. She found it appropriate to sarcastically say, "Oh no, how will I ever be able to open my jars?" FML

#21378617
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29953) - you deserved it (47)

On 03/20/2015 at 9:32pm - love - by tumbleshay - United States (Oregon)

Today, while shopping with my 6-year-old daughter, she said, "Mommy, remember you wanna get duck tape!" A middle-aged guy nearby scoffed and told her: "DUCT, not DUCK. Dumb cunt." I ended up having to drive my bawling daughter home with no shopping. FML

#21352119
292 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43574) - you deserved it (2997)

On 02/08/2015 at 2:16pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, I bought a small tub of coconut pieces in a bid to eat healthier snacks at work. I noticed that the chunks were a bit slimy, but thought nothing of it and kept eating. It wasn't until I reached the final few pieces that I noticed a huge black slug crawling across the bottom of the tub. FML

#21346678
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29801) - you deserved it (4872)

On 01/30/2015 at 6:00am - misc - by goodbyediet (woman) - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, I started at my new job. Turns out my boss is a complete douchebag. He spent most of the day looking over our shoulders and making cuntish comments about our work, then called a guy a piece of shit for farting and forced him to spray disinfectant on his chair. FML

#21342765
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28983) - you deserved it (2532)

On 01/23/2015 at 8:27am - work - by Mishlette (woman) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, I had to explain to my teenage daughter that The Interview wasn't a documentary and that Kim Jong-un wasn't actually assassinated by a pair of goofy reporters. FML

#21338906
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27170) - you deserved it (5907)

On 01/17/2015 at 1:11pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I slept on the plane ride home and had a scary nightmare. I started screaming in my dream, so loud that it shocked the old lady sitting next to me into screaming as well. The whole plane began laughing as we were both screaming. FML

Today, I posted a photo on Facebook showing a side-by-side view of me before and after I'd tried out my new makeup. My dad commented, "What is this, Gollum cosplaying an Orc?" My mum, brother, and over 20 "friends" liked his comment. FML

#21320382
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27477) - you deserved it (4636)

On 12/19/2014 at 2:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I was so lonely, I tried to get into bed noiselessly while pretending I had a boyfriend asleep in it. FML

#21317613
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31104) - you deserved it (5237)

On 12/14/2014 at 10:22pm - love - by lonesome - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend of 2 years after eating in a 5-star restaurant. She said that she wasn't ready and that she would walk home by herself, which she did. A homeless gentleman walked up from behind me, patted me on the back and said, "Bitches man." I cried. FML

#21315476
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39372) - you deserved it (2694)

On 12/11/2014 at 7:01am - love - by Brasilian29 (man) - United States (California)



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  • Hello everybody, how's it going? This week we're looking at the delicate art of getting along with your neighbours. If you've ever lived in an apartment building, you'll know that having people live…

Friday 22 May 2015

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