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Pelvispresley

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Pelvispresley
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 522
  • Number of comments : 118
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 40 posted

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Pelvispresley's favorite FMLs

Today, I was getting a haircut. The lady accusingly told me she'd have to thoroughly wash my hair before she started, as it was way too greasy to cut through. FML

#20473123
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7764) - you deserved it (37560)

On 01/22/2013 at 2:18pm - misc - by Whoops (man) - United Kingdom

Today, my friend and I were trying out a site on which you talk to strangers using a mic and webcam. We came across a cute guy, who said to my friend, "Tell the fat guy to move." He was referring to me. I'm a girl. FML

Today, I'm sharing a hotel room with co-workers on a business trip. The walls are paper-thin, you could hear a pin drop, and I'm trying to make my explosive diarrhea as close to silent as possible. FML

#20431241
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31417) - you deserved it (2265)

On 12/30/2012 at 1:14am - work - by avoid the sour cream - United States

Today, I auditioned for a role in ballet. My stomach was in pain and as I ran to be lifted into the air by my partner, I let out a huge fart. The auditorium was dead silent. FML

#20429501
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35421) - you deserved it (3928)

On 12/29/2012 at 4:32am - misc - by gassy - United States (Washington)

Today, I went shopping. At the counter, the cashier started flirting with me and asked me for my number. He was cute, so I gave it to him. After walking out of the store, I got a text that said, "I didn't want to say it out loud, but your pants are unzipped." FML

#20427288
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30385) - you deserved it (3629)

On 12/28/2012 at 2:49am - misc - by Ren - United States (Ohio)

Today, "The Phantom of the Opera" soundtrack blasted me awake at 4 am. Not knowing how it got on my iPod, I checked and found I had bought the whole $17.00 album in my sleep. This is the second time this month; the first time I downloaded the soundtrack from "The Wizard of Oz". FML

#20198547
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23436) - you deserved it (5525)

On 12/10/2012 at 12:10am - money - by hailey - United States (Maryland)

Today, I ran across the street due to a line of cars waiting for me to cross. Just as I reached the other side, my iPhone slipped out of my hand and fell into the road, just in time to get run over by multiple cars, one after the other. FML

#20181219
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17283) - you deserved it (6006)

On 11/27/2012 at 1:45pm - misc - by unknown - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, my boyfriend and I were preparing for the arrival of Hurricane Sandy. I tasked him with going out to buy emergency groceries in case we lose power. He returned with dozens of microwave cup noodles. We're going to starve. FML

#20137235
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19484) - you deserved it (2928)

On 10/28/2012 at 4:14pm - love - by cupnoodles (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was mugged. Not for a laptop, cell phone or money, but for the cupcake I was eating. FML

#19984969
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23663) - you deserved it (2100)

On 07/26/2012 at 6:42am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, I was in a business meeting. I was giving a Powerpoint presentation to my boss and a few other associates. Then a notification popped up in the middle of my presentation reminding me that I needed to renew my pornhub subscription. FML

#19754220
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10206) - you deserved it (32027)

On 06/08/2012 at 7:58am - work - by WaffleMan (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was sitting in my school's crowded auditorium. When our single, abstinence-only ballsack of a Sex Ed teacher was announced to be stepping down due to being pregnant, I burst into uncontrollable laughter. My reward was aching sides and a week of detention. FML

#19285131
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23292) - you deserved it (6312)

On 03/15/2012 at 9:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I had to give my husband a tutorial on how to use jumper cables. Confused and flustered, he requested written instructions. FML

#18975500
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17990) - you deserved it (2928)

On 02/02/2012 at 9:50am - misc - by MM (woman) -

Today, I was woken up at 6am to the sound of my mother on the back deck of the house hooting like an owl. FML

#18346239
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18554) - you deserved it (1832)

On 11/25/2011 at 11:24am - misc - by tireedddddd - United States (New York)

Today, I brought my boyfriend over to meet the family. After several long moments of silence, one of my sisters burst out laughing, and asked, "Okay, who is this guy really?" FML

#17954133
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24677) - you deserved it (2494)

On 10/10/2011 at 7:16pm - love - by octoberrain - United States (Ohio)

Today, to show that he really wanted me to shave myself, my boyfriend pretended to go down on me, but instead of following through, he stuck a wad of gum in my pubic hair and got back up. FML

#17789200
293 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25911) - you deserved it (34495) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 09/20/2011 at 5:20pm - intimacy - by Prinpette - France



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