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PaigeLeeAnn11's favorite FMLs
by sick of this shit / 03/12/2016 at 8:33am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
Today, I heard a noise outside in the middle of the night, so I went out for a look. I'm also pregnant and can't stop farting. I get 2 steps outside and accidentally let a huge one rip, then, from the shadows I hear "Oh my god!" and then running in the opposite direction. I farted away a prowler. FML
by Gassy / 09/21/2015 at 10:45am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 08/15/2015 at 5:32am / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy
Today, I was unloading Cokes outside of the movie theater I work at. While bent over, I heard someone call out, "Damn girl, you got a fat ass," followed by, "Oh God, that's a man!" I am indeed a man. FML
by Why Me / 08/12/2015 at 9:50am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
Today, I overheard my wife telling my mother-in-law I was diagnosed with a learning disability earlier this week. She replied, "I always knew he was a retard. Why did you ever marry that idiot?" All my wife did was mutter "I don't know." FML
by Anonymous / 06/04/2015 at 5:08am / Maldives (Maale) / Miscellaneous
Today, my crackhead neighbour got slightly annoyed at my 2-day-old daughter's late-night wailing. Well, I think so, anyway, as she politely requested us to "SHUT THAT CUNT KID UP." or she would "BLOW BOTH OUR HOUSES UP, YOU FUCKING ASSFUCKS." But I'm not 100% sure. FML
by Anonymous / 05/29/2015 at 11:51pm / Australia / Kids
Today, my dog was knocked unconscious. I had to race him to the vet and pay a small fortune for x-rays and shots. All because he ran into the kitchen at full speed and smashed headfirst into the refrigerator after hearing me open a bag of turkey. FML
by roadie42 / 05/24/2015 at 11:15pm / United States (Missouri) / Animals
by Anonymous / 01/23/2015 at 9:58am / United States / Love
by Mr_snuggels / 12/24/2014 at 3:05pm / Canada (Ontario) / Animals
by fuck / 12/16/2014 at 4:04pm / Norway (Buskerud) / Health
by boo / 11/16/2014 at 10:07pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
by how about never? / 10/19/2014 at 7:22am / United States (California) / Kids
by highfive / 10/16/2014 at 9:27pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love
by Anonymous / 10/04/2014 at 10:58am / United States (Massachusetts) / Health
by cat lady / 08/30/2014 at 7:56am / Norway (Rogaland) / Animals