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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 16 January 1997 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2232
  • Number of comments : 40
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About Ozzien : Meow.

Books: Legend by Marie Lu, Game of Thrones by George R. R. Martin

Video games: Ace Attorney, Portal, Ghost Trick

Ozzien's page activity

Visits<b>3051628</b> - the 11/03/2015 at 1:43pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 12:32am<b>Rithvikhari</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 11:58pm<b>AviatOfficial</b> - the 10/17/2015 at 4:21am<b>rexgober</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 2:14pm<b>LilRedRobinHood</b> - the 10/14/2015 at 11:00pm<b>DerBuchmacher</b> - the 09/14/2015 at 4:35pm<b>TheLostCauseFML</b> - the 09/06/2015 at 8:40pm<b>kawayi</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 2:07pm<b>martin8337</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 10:57pm<b>balboa_2</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 3:53pm<b>noctali_Solstice</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 6:03pm<b>wheresmymary</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 5:19pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 1:34pm<b>gichikku</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 12:31pm<b>kaed</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 11:11am<b>clumsyninja13</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 5:54pm<b>lmfao789</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 12:16am

Fucked!<b>3051628</b> - the 10/16/2015 at 8:32pm<b>TheLostCauseFML</b> - the 09/07/2015 at 2:39am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 7:34pm<b>martin8337</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 4:06am

Ozzien's FML badges

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How about we run you a bath and give you a new car as well?

I NEED to know!

You went as far as reading the terms of use. You’re a total FML completist.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

See all of Ozzien's badges

Ozzien's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to the bowling alley. I have short, stubby fingers, and as I looked for a bowling ball that would fit my hand properly, an old man watched me searching, and approached asking, "Is that how you are with women? Fingering them, tossing them in the gutter, and looking for another?" FML


I agree, your life sucks (22836) - you deserved it (2720)

On 11/16/2015 at 4:47pm - intimacy - by weldingmachine217 (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my 6-year-old daughter touched a tray I'd just pulled out of the oven. I quickly swatted her hand away, but then noticed she wasn't hurt or burned at all. I then gingerly touched the tray and got scalded. My daughter giggled maniacally as I screamed. To be honest, I'm now terrified of her. FML


I agree, your life sucks (27283) - you deserved it (3887)

On 09/26/2015 at 12:10am - kids - by :| (woman) - New Zealand (Nelson)

Today, I was signing with my deaf brother at a local McDonald's. We were having a laugh about a game we played last night when this morbidly obese woman waddled over to us. She was utterly convinced we were "talking shit" about her and made a scene about our "hand gestures." Seriously? FML


I agree, your life sucks (27489) - you deserved it (1365)

On 09/15/2015 at 6:31pm - misc - by Stairs? Noooooo - United States (California)

Today, I told my nephew to be careful when crossing the street in front of a bus because it might eat him. We then watched as a bus slowed down and stopped in front of a group of people. When the bus moved away, all the people were gone. My nephew is terrified, and won't stop crying. FML


I agree, your life sucks (16002) - you deserved it (20451)

On 09/11/2015 at 8:32pm - kids - by busmonster - United States (Virginia)

Today, my psycho cat stood on my toilet seat and challenged me to a stand-off. After 10 minutes, I couldn't hold it in any more and asked to use my neighbor's bathroom instead. I told him my toilet was broken. FML


I agree, your life sucks (19214) - you deserved it (9202)

On 09/05/2015 at 1:56am - animals - by I'm a pussy, yeah yeah (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got a notice from the housing association, if I don't water my lawn I will be charged a $150 fine. Yet if I do water my lawn the city with charge me a $150 fine because of the drought. FML


I agree, your life sucks (25269) - you deserved it (1505)

On 09/01/2015 at 3:43pm - misc - by really? - United States

Today, a tarantula joined my stuffed animal collection in its drawer. It, unfortunately, wasn't stuffed. FML


I agree, your life sucks (21351) - you deserved it (1820)

On 08/14/2015 at 3:01am - animals - by MushyKetchup (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I woke up panting and drenched in sweat from a horrible nightmare. I'd been dreaming that bright, colored shapes were falling from the sky and I couldn't make them all neatly align with one another on the ground. I guess I should stop playing so much Tetris before bed. FML


I agree, your life sucks (21836) - you deserved it (4786)

On 08/08/2015 at 6:56pm - misc - by I love L (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while walking down the street, a truck hit a puddle and splashed me with water. After I cursed and flipped him off, he put his truck in reverse and splashed me again. FML


I agree, your life sucks (24155) - you deserved it (9161)

On 07/18/2015 at 2:01am - misc - by supersmashpika (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got a nose piercing. I was asleep at the time in my backyard, and the piercer was a snake. FML

Today, at 3 in the morning, I was getting out of bed to use the bathroom, when my boyfriend grabbed my arm, looked at me wide-eyed and begged, "Don't... They'll take your skin..." He doesn't remember saying it, and now I'm scared shitless to use the bathroom at night. FML


I agree, your life sucks (28708) - you deserved it (2622)

On 07/10/2015 at 11:49pm - misc - by Julianapilikusplatosophophes (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, while reading my girlfriends kid's a story, her daughter started pouring a tiny watering can on my head. When I asked her what she was doing, she said, "Watering your head so your hair grows back". I'm twenty-seven. FML


I agree, your life sucks (25059) - you deserved it (2214)

On 07/06/2015 at 10:21pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was having a dream about Chris Pratt. Instead of having a sexy dream that I would have enjoyed, I dreamt he was a supervisor at my work. He kept telling me how much I sucked. FML


I agree, your life sucks (27963) - you deserved it (3360)

On 07/06/2015 at 11:14am - intimacy - by BrittUnicorn - United States (Tennessee)

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