Ozzien

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Ozzien

6Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 16 January 1997 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2997
  • Number of comments : 49
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About Ozzien : Meow.

Ozzien's page activity

Visits<b>kcl729</b> - the 05/30/2016 at 3:02pm<b>Tripartita</b> - the 05/30/2016 at 10:06am<b>phoneaddict13</b> - the 03/30/2016 at 4:43pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 03/28/2016 at 8:01am<b>xxcamxx15</b> - the 03/24/2016 at 10:54pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 03/10/2016 at 2:20pm<b>Sayeret_Matkal</b> - the 02/28/2016 at 1:20pm<b>snarkytruth</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 4:19am<b>isnobodyhere</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 3:23pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 2:10am<b>netflixislove</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 12:09am<b>WoodKiller</b> - the 12/09/2015 at 12:01am<b>HerpNdurp88</b> - the 12/04/2015 at 11:08am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 12/04/2015 at 9:30am<b>tiger820</b> - the 12/04/2015 at 9:28am<b>3051628</b> - the 11/03/2015 at 1:43pm<b>Rithvikhari</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 11:58pm<b>AviatOfficial</b> - the 10/17/2015 at 4:21am

Fucked!<b>snarkytruth</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 10:19am<b>isnobodyhere</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 9:23pm<b>3051628</b> - the 10/16/2015 at 8:32pm<b>TheLostCauseFML</b> - the 09/07/2015 at 2:39am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 7:34pm<b>martin8337</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 4:06am

Ozzien's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Gold Rush

How about we run you a bath and give you a new car as well?

I NEED to know!

You went as far as reading the terms of use. You’re a total FML completist.

See all of Ozzien's badges

Ozzien's favorite FMLs

Today, my therapist told me to write down my goals for the next five years. After thinking hard for what seemed like forever, all I could come up with was getting a girlfriend and having an FML published. And to be honest, I'm not even sure about that first one. FML

by Anonymous / 06/11/2016 at 1:03am / United States (California) / Health

Today, I'm so tired from constantly soothing my crying 2-month-old baby that I've started trying to soothe inanimate objects with baby talk when they make a noise. My fridge stated beeping and I began an involuntary chorus of, 'It's OK darling, shhhhhh, it's alright.' FML

by Babyhazy / 06/05/2016 at 5:52pm / Australia (Victoria) / Kids

Today, due to me not looking, I accidentally bit an apple made of styrofoam that was meant to be a part of a display on the kitchen table. My roommates were there and me not wanting to embarrass myself by putting it back, I walked out, apple in hand, to throw it away elsewhere. FML

by Cinnanyan / 06/02/2016 at 6:20am / Philippines (Quezon City) / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband and I both got smart watches. We were running around, acting like we were in a James Bond movie, having fun. Until our neighbors called the cops on us for hiding in their bushes. FML

by nykkymcallister / 05/18/2016 at 11:07pm / United States (Maryland) / Geek

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was at a mini arcade and accidentally put a hundred dollar bill through the quarter machine. FML

by aianmoo16 / 05/01/2016 at 5:52pm / United States (Illinois) / Money

Today, I saw my cat licking something on the side of the road and went to check what it was. It was someone's old cigarette. I now know why she wants to be let out so often: She's addicted to nicotine. FML

by Emmaraine189 / 04/27/2016 at 10:22pm / Canada (Manitoba) / Animals

Today, my roommate's shopping addiction reached a whole new level. He bought a box of tampons just because they were 40% off. Yes, he. FML

by Roomie pay rent plz / 04/23/2016 at 9:25pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, while using the leg press at the gym, some guy thought he could use more weight than me since I look really young. He hurt himself. He then blamed me and tried to get me kicked out. FML

by Shotacon / 04/06/2016 at 11:06pm / United States (New York) / Health

Today, I noticed that both my managers completely ignored me when I told them that I'm fully booked, and can't take any more clients. Both of them scheduled additional clients. At the same. Three people from different companies will show up at my office at the same time. Yep. FML

by O / 04/03/2016 at 11:38pm / Sweden (Vastra Gotaland) / Work

Today, I explained to my five year-old son that the dinosaurs were wiped out because of a meteorite that hit our planet. He replied, "They should've stood out of the way." FML

by sauve dino. / 03/24/2016 at 11:12pm / Kids

Today, I went to Costco and the cashier asked me how I was doing so, to be nice, I asked her back. She said, "I'm fucking horrible, I'm working at Costco," nearly making me spit my drink out. FML

by sorkin15 / 03/24/2016 at 5:06pm / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, I woke up at 2 AM to the sounds of my roommate and his girlfriend on Skype, playing a game of, "No, I love YOU more, baby, schmoopy schmoopy schmoopy schmoo". It went on for around half an hour. FML

by GetAnotherRoomAlready / 03/12/2016 at 12:58am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was once again mistaken for an escaped convict. I live near a women's correctional facility and apparently my nursing scrubs look a lot like their prisoners' uniforms. The cop made me late for work. FML

by Never Been Arrested / 03/01/2016 at 4:44pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work

Today, while on the tram with my friend, we ended up discussing religion. When we started talking about God, some guy asked us, in a serious tone, to "stop talking about me" because it was really starting to bother him. FML

by DieuEstUnHomme / 02/03/2016 at 10:44am / France (Champagne-Ardenne) / Transportation

Today, I found out if a tree falls in the forest and there's nobody around, it does in fact make a sound, and also $5,000 worth of damage to your truck. FML

by Anonymous / 01/20/2016 at 12:05am / United States (New Mexico) / Miscellaneous