Ozmat

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Ozmat

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 12 December 1985 (30 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1676
  • Number of comments : 106
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 28 posted

About Ozmat : I'm a girl that loves to party and have a good time.

Ozmat's page activity

Visits<b>Bowtie</b> - the 02/10/2016 at 2:29pm<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 6:08pm<b>Jonny_Blaze0017</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 6:57pm<b>minecraf_cow</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 10:48am<b>babe7260</b> - the 03/18/2014 at 5:43am<b>Trollx</b> - the 12/12/2013 at 11:19am<b>MandyCat484</b> - the 11/15/2013 at 1:16pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:50pm<b>DocBastard</b> - the 02/19/2011 at 8:28am<b>Mervin22</b> - the 01/29/2011 at 8:32pm<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 12:11am<b>JustSoLost</b> - the 01/26/2010 at 1:57am<b>tikicrown</b> - the 01/25/2010 at 1:55am<b>DoveOrHawk</b> - the 08/18/2009 at 10:37pm<b>prplr</b> - the 08/18/2009 at 5:17pm<b>ch2358</b> - the 08/18/2009 at 1:15pm<b>kayla_f_babyyy</b> - the 08/18/2009 at 10:32am<b>mari0958</b> - the 08/18/2009 at 7:43am

Ozmat's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Ozmat's favorite FMLs

Today, while waiting on the platform, a blind man asked out loud for some help getting into the subway car. I helped him through the doors and into a seat. I decided to sit down as well. Twenty minutes later, I realized I was on the wrong subway line. FML

by Anonymous / 09/24/2010 at 1:06pm / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation

Today, while waiting on the platform, a blind man asked out loud for some help getting into the subway car. I helped him through the doors and into a seat. I decided to sit down as well. Twenty minutes later, I realized I was on the wrong subway line. FML

by Anonymous / 09/24/2010 at 1:06pm / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation

Today, in math class, I had the urge to fart. I had the bright idea that if I dropped my textbook and farted at the same time, nobody would hear it. I dropped my textbook, everyone looked at me, then I farted. Loudly. FML

by fartwoman / 06/22/2010 at 9:41pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, I woke up at a guy's house drunk and soaked in my own pee. I had passed out with all my clothes on. Since I was late for work and didn't have a change of clothes, all I could do was throw my jeans in the dryer. I had to sit all day at work in crusty pee pants. FML

by goldenshower / 02/05/2010 at 1:22pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I started our diet. After a long day of being held accountable for every calorie I ate, I went home to sneak a snack. My boyfriend came over to surprise me, and found me on the couch shoveling left-over Indian food into my mouth. FML

by Glutton / 01/27/2010 at 8:29pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, my 5 month old son decided that my lip ring was a toy. Thinking it would be ok, I let him touch it. He got his finger caught and pulled his hand back. The lip ring is still in, but now I have a huge gaping hole in my face. FML

by pinky / 01/06/2010 at 1:12pm / United Kingdom (London) / Kids

Today, my 5 month old son decided that my lip ring was a toy. Thinking it would be ok, I let him touch it. He got his finger caught and pulled his hand back. The lip ring is still in, but now I have a huge gaping hole in my face. FML

by pinky / 01/06/2010 at 1:12pm / United Kingdom (London) / Kids

Today, my 5 month old son decided that my lip ring was a toy. Thinking it would be ok, I let him touch it. He got his finger caught and pulled his hand back. The lip ring is still in, but now I have a huge gaping hole in my face. FML

by pinky / 01/06/2010 at 1:12pm / United Kingdom (London) / Kids

Today, I found out that shutting off the heat in the rental property my parents owned was a bad idea. The water froze and the pipes burst, causing the whole kitchen ceiling to fall down. The water ruined the wood floors and the appliances. I turned off the heat to save money. FML

by WorkSexMonkey / 01/04/2010 at 2:20pm / United States (New Jersey) / Money

Today, I found out that shutting off the heat in the rental property my parents owned was a bad idea. The water froze and the pipes burst, causing the whole kitchen ceiling to fall down. The water ruined the wood floors and the appliances. I turned off the heat to save money. FML

by WorkSexMonkey / 01/04/2010 at 2:20pm / United States (New Jersey) / Money

Today, I was at my school's spaghetti dinner with my family. My brother shook up my mom's soda, as a prank. My entire class witnessed my mom waving around an overflowing Diet Coke while my dad yelled, "Come on, put your mouth on it! Suck it! Suck it, Kathy!" FML

by gbhlaughingstock / 08/18/2009 at 3:20pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was going on a first date with a girl I really like. We were going to see the new Harry Potter movie, and she told me she was getting all dressed up. It was only after I picked her up I realized she meant that she was dressing nicely. I was dressed as Harry Potter. FML

by harrysolo / 07/18/2009 at 9:26pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, my daughter asked me when was the first time I had sex. After I told her 22 she quickly shouted, "Beat ya!" She's thirteen. FML

by Noname / 03/06/2009 at 2:04pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy