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OochenSnoochen

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OochenSnoochen
  • Town/Country : Sydney, Australia
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 1 March 1990 (24 years)
  • Number of visits : 690
  • Number of comments : 64
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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OochenSnoochen's favorite FMLs

Today, after years of bad blood, my husband decided to invite his parents to dinner. After making rude remarks about my pregnancy, his dad eventually muttered that I'm a slut. My husband punched him, his wife called the police, and now I'm all alone while he sits in a jail cell for battery. FML

#20030486
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25322) - you deserved it (1450)

On 08/19/2012 at 7:25pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Gloucestershire)

Today, I tried to explain to my daughter why she couldn’t have a sleepover with her boyfriend yet. She said, "If you're so worried about me having sex, then you failed as a father because I've already banged four guys." FML

#19995628
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52250) - you deserved it (9697)

On 08/01/2012 at 12:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, my husband and I went to the store. Because we have no car, we had to walk four miles in the 115 fahrenheit weather. It didn't click until we were standing outside the door with a metric shit-tonne of ice-cream, that we'd have to tear ass back home to keep it all from melting. FML

#19876028
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5547) - you deserved it (22598)

On 07/01/2012 at 1:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was T-boned at an intersection. In an ambulance. On the way to the hospital after being T-boned at an intersection. FML

#19873048
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29684) - you deserved it (1162)

On 06/30/2012 at 8:31pm - health - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, it was my wedding day. Midway through the ceremony, my visibly drunk uncle stood up and denounced the minister for "preaching yer god shite where it weren't never be welcome". FML

#19276871
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18366) - you deserved it (1977)

On 03/14/2012 at 10:38am - love - by mel_bear_ (woman) - United Kingdom (Reading)

Today, a hooker refused my custom. According to her, "Even whores have standards." FML

#17548776
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18679) - you deserved it (39369)

On 08/22/2011 at 3:35pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my roommate and I got into an argument. He told me he understood if I didn't forgive him "for a couple of days." He'd confessed to undressing my girlfriend in her sleep. FML

#17447904
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32377) - you deserved it (2383)

On 08/12/2011 at 3:54am - intimacy - by James (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, a fight broke out in a bar between several people, over some talk about one of their moms being somewhat inclined towards intercourse with her pets. I managed to slip out quietly with just a scratch from flying chair debris, despite having started the rumor. FML

#17376503
23 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6917) - you deserved it (59029)

On 08/05/2011 at 10:05am - intimacy - by Username - United States

Today, I wore a Stanford college T-shirt to school. My Spanish teacher took one look at it and said "You wish". FML

#15752266
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29783) - you deserved it (7176)

On 04/12/2011 at 6:09am - misc - by anon -

Today, my boyfriend and I were in our room getting hot and heavy. As he was entering me, he started making electronic whirring sounds. Once inside, he said in a robotic voice, "Initiating launch sequence in 3... 2... 1..." and began thrusting as fast as possible. FML

#14333152
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35242) - you deserved it (7057)

On 12/25/2010 at 8:38am - intimacy - by Jessie - United States (Texas)

Today, I told my 3 year old daughter to behave or I'd spank her. She looked right at me and said "Bring it." FML

#13026235
417 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28826) - you deserved it (26804)

On 09/12/2010 at 9:38pm - kids - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was babysitting for my mum's friend. I put her little boy on my knee, and he kept pulling at my top. I asked him "are you hungry?" He replied "No, I want to see your titties." FML

#12305756
289 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35255) - you deserved it (9880)

On 08/04/2010 at 6:25am - intimacy - by Embarressed... (woman) - United Kingdom (Derbyshire)



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